What happened... it's so sad... my history

I will start with the year 1998/1999, I am not sure which one it was. After school I went with with 2 friends home and one of them invited me and the other guy to play some games with him at home. He had 3 PCs and so we started to play this game called Starcraft. I remember that I lost at the end with Z. I had mass Ultras without any upgrades. 6 or 7 years later I found the game in a shopping mall. It was a bestseller collection and include the add on Broodwar, for only 9,99€. I immediately remembered the game and thought it was really fun when I played it. So I bought it, it was August 2004 I think.

I never liked singleplayer games so I just jumped into the multiplayer. I played a TvP on LT and had no f*cking idea what I was doing or what I had to do. The funny part was when I wanted to move out with some SCVs and out of nowhere some blue energy balls killed them. My opponent gave me vision and I saw that he had surrounded my base with goons and arbiters. After that game I joined a game called "fastest" (or something). Sadly I sticked with fastmaps for like a year. It was easy to learn and even a league was available (pg-league.net I think). After being good on that map I got bored, I wasn't the best but the ones who could beat me were like 5 players and also preferred to play with me on their team. So it was time to move forward and to improve. So I started to play "low maps".

Hardly but true I got owned pretty hard at the start, because I missed any knowledge of BOs and I even didn't knew the maps, expand timings and so on. After some days of replay and gaming sessions I got pretty decent and joined nD. (my only clan account on any public server which didn't got reseted until now) My mechanics were fine, I was used to pump out shitloads of units and to not miss workers, because of playing that fastmap.
I started to play some games on WGTour and PGtour but both died pretty fast without me making much games. Somewhere here I didn't improved anymore and so I made one bad decision, I searched for a maphack, found it and used it. I don't know how long I used the maphack but it was for a very long time. I started to be a regular visitor of the channels op ger-a, op tot), op mgz) on europe and op 3.33- (was it that way?) and op shield- and many more. I used a ton of different accounts, started to beat players who were considered to be good. Somewhere here I joined the clan -ScT-. The reason for me to join them was, because I have met them on an offline event (Broodwar only LAN in Düsseldorf) and they let me in because I was a new player who was making some good results. Then TheAbyss came out and I played there. I think it was around end of 2006 or early 2007. I finished my first season with C- and ~20 played games. I remember a russian guy who was playing under a korean flag during that time and being on top of the ladder, I think his ID was "dredredre". At this point I had a dual life. I don't mean rl and vl, no I just had a vl, but one with hack on public servers and one without on iccup. For my hard work I was rewarded with a place in the turkisch national team.
At the end it could only end one way. I was caught hacking during this time http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=69911. Well after that I was a punching bag in the german community and got banned on the main german bw board, newssite and clanleague (even if I never used a hack in any league!).
During that time I felt so lost, I avoided to play on public servers and just played iccup. somewhere here I joined the clan Get. I played a ton of games I think both my clan accounts had stats like ~150-170 and ~170-160 and I was jumping between C+ and B-. After that season I felt really confident in my self, I was sure I don't need to hack to be good. Then someday there were some spots for the ger-b nationalteam available. All I had to do, was to have more ladder points than every other German who wanted to get the invite. I finished 2nd and didn't got my chance, because I was an Idiot before and as a result I kept being and Idiot. After founding the old thread and the other players who got their invites, I am pretty sure that I would have deserved that Ger-B spot given that out of the qualified players I was the 2nd best, maybe even the best (thread on german board here, some funny shit going on there http://starcraft2.ingame.de/forum/showthread.php?t=160543).
Sadly I had to go to the army at the first January 2009 and so I had to stop playing Starcraft. Nothing really happened then for 9 months. I didn't have played a lot of SC just tried to qualifier for the Ger WCG national finals and took a map of dashwriter[pg] who had to go after that game and begged me to continue the game 3 days later. Stupid as I was, I sad ok and his APM got the 2nd and 3rd game way higher then the first ine, like his skill. Until today I am pretty sure someone else played for him, even the hotkeys weren't the same but who cares since he also didn't qualified.

After my time at the army I started to play again and joined NrG. I didn't wanted to join, since I was banned in BWCL and didn't care for leagues anymore. But They guy called NrG.NeverExpo aka as Kurt begged me so hard and one of my old fastmap allies was on that clan. So it happened I joined another clan. Before Kurt asked me to leave, because I was a caught hacker which was the first thing I have told him before I even joined, I met a lot of friends there.

Without them I wouldn't even have bought SC 2 after the Beta.

- NrG.Crackling (who was the 3rd best German Zerg in my opinion behind Mondragon and Kolll)
- NrG.v1 (thy for proving me that TvP is unwinnable T_T )
- NrG.Runa and NrG.SortOf (my lovely Swedes, nice that u 2 do so well in SC2)
- NrG.Effortless (kid you are so funny, almost as funny as I am)

also to
- Get.Shauni (I think a learned a lot by playing TvP vs you, f*ck you were so imbalancedly good)
- Get.Kimoh for letting me join Get.

and now back to the roots, my good old fastmap allies:
- denkzettel
- schokoriegel
- fr3ssend3r-zerg
- seiko12
- pr0vieh
- 1fach[zu]breit
- phinix[mage]
- ag.snuffi (du hund wo bist du nur?)
- ill.kor- (Hartz IV 4 ever hm?)
- nd.violett (ok bist kein fastmapper, aber trotzdem kenne ich dich auch schon wenig)
- achilles[aor]
- and many, many more....

also greetings to my old haters
- HoRRoR.T-ScT- (danke das du miich motiviert hast zu spilen obwohl ich eigtl keine lust mehr hatte)
- DA]KuH (weil ich besser war als du)
- iG.Infernal (weil du Kurt solange vollgeheult hast, bis er gefragt hat ob ich nicht leaven kann da er mich auch nicht kicken wollte)
- Benrath-ScT- (weil du ein wannabe bist)
- Delphi (weil ich bei SC2 meine Genugtuung bekam, als ich dich sauber 5:0 weggerotz habe auf der Ladder und in irgendeinem Turnier)

So why do I write the crap, this wall of words? It is easy, because I miss these old times. I miss these whole new world that I discovered right after buying this bestseller game for 9,99€. I miss the time where we played 3v3 on PGL fastest map maxed v1, the time where I was searching on broodwar.de for old threads to learn about the oldschool community and to see how often selector got caught hacking. I even miss the good old flamewars on our lovely german broodwar board. All in all I just want to thank everyone of the people I have ever met on battle.net or iccup, wgtour and pgtour, you all made every penny of the 9,99€ worth it. I am pretty sure I will never ever have such feelings agains, such a good time with so much stuff to explore in the e-sport world and so much to improve for myself. Damn I hope to see some of the people on SC2 again. I have met some of you again and some are still missing, no ICQ no anything since SC2 Beta =(

Finally I want to apologize for using a maphack and for somethings I have said.

Maybe someday we will met each other on the good old battle.net and play some Starcraft Broodwar.