EPTJust a story for me. Hope you got time to read it and like it. It's just a story. Sorry for my English.
Here I am, again, in TL after 2 months. Those two monts was very hard for me, so hard that I didn't even have time to visit the TL site, or to play a game in SC.
Those two months I was studying very hard to pass some of my courses with some good grades, but the whole thing is that I don't wanna study something to get a job and get paid but I wanna study cause I like it. But as I study many hours a day many thoughts are coming to my head, of what really count in this world and what not.
I recall some things that I did the past years when I was a teenager and I am sure that if I had then, the experience that I have know, I would have done many things different and in a more effective way. I am not sure if I regret doing what I did, cause I think that if I hadn't done those things I would have been in a different spot (maybe worse) now.
To give you the whole picture let me give you (some aspects) of my story so far.
Well, I was a normal guy. I was going to school, and I was kinda good in maths and chemistry. I had some friends and we had a rockband and we were going out every Friday/Saturday night with my friends. I had time to study, play music, go out, relax, pass some time with my familly and all that good staff.
But then, when I was in my last year of school and I need to study a little bit more to pass in a university. I begin to study normally and to be honest I wasn't understanding all the things at that time but I kept studying and studying. As time was passing I was getting better and better at maths and physics (I was never good at physics before) and programming and I liked those things that I was learning. And I write well enough in the exams and was able to get in a Electrical and Computer Engineering school.
I was very enthousiast about that but by the time I got in the first lecture I reallized that I couldn't understand that much, even in Linear algebra (it was the esiest course). But I liked the courses and I start studying. I become quite good and when I finished the first year on that university I had quite good grades and I apply to an other university (a better one) if the could transfer me, cause it was closer to my home and in a better city.
And (after one term) they accepted me and I got in that university. I was expecting to find much better students than me there, but the reallity was that they were like my past fellow students. Most were average some were bad and quite a few were very good. So I start studying again I as the time was passing courses were getting more interesting but harder too.
All that time that I was studying I didn't noticed one big thing. I was neglecting my familly, my friends and even myself. Simultaniusly I started playing SC2 and I didn't have time to spend with anyone else. (There are many things that I am not saying in order not to make my story boring.)
During my sring term exam time period (last year) I studying, as always very much. That was the time when my grandma had a stroke (I don't know the exact english word so tell me if I am wrong) and she was I hospital for one week. At that week I didn't spoke with her and I was talking with my mother on the telephone and she was telling me that my grandma was getting better and better. So I kept studying for one week, but one morning I called my brother and he told me that my parents were on the hospital and that the situation wasn't good.
I left my house without a second thought and after 4 hours I was in my home town in hospital to see my grandma. She wasn't good. She couldn't even open her eyes or move her hand. i told her that I was there to see her and that she was going to be good again. Or so I hoped.
I stayed there 4 days and she was in the same situation every day. Her situation stabilized, but it was i na bad situation. So I left after these 4 days cause I had exams. But next day she died. I gone back for the funeral and get back again for the exams. I lost one course with all that, but thats not the point. In a few days are the exams of that lesson and if I don't pass again, I will lose a whole year. But I don't regret that I lost this course while being with my sick grandma (how could I?), I regreat not being with her a day or two before while she was better. While she could have been happy to see me and we will have talked a little a little bit.
That summer I didn't study anything. I was just with my brother, watching him playing SC2 and spend some time with my family. I wasn't going out very much and I just relaxed.
After this experience I reallized that I must spend more time with people (family and friends) and not studying so much. Cause have good time with other people counts more. After september I started playing more SC2 and I was trying to help my brother to become better, and so I was having some good time with my brother. I even missed a course (a lab) to watch I game in a tournament that he took part. And I wasn't studying so much for the first 3 months of this term.
But when I went back to my hometown in Christmas, I took some books with me and I started studying again. And I found the feeling about studying that I have lost. So in order to come back I studied for two months and finally in a few days my exams end. My brother has told my that he would come to visit me tomorrow, but I told him that Imust study, and we could not do many things together, so he (he was and a little bit ill) told me that he would not coem this weekend and will come some other time.
I hate that I need to study. After all of these, I really like studying but when I need to loose some good moments with people that count for me, I hate studying. I am trying to find ways of studying better and I am thinking about cutting off many things and not waste even a minute, to have time for the people cause I think that at last moments are all that count and is really nice when you remember doing things with people you love and need.
I wanna be very good in my school but not that much that I need to neglect the people around me.
Notes: I need to end this cause it is quite big, so it will be a more interesting and thought giving second part, but you can still think about things that count in your life and if those balances between them are changing, and if you have really learnt something from any experience. My story is much more complicated than this but I wanna keep it as simple as I can.
