Good blog, pretty deep shit. Some counselling couldn't hurt if you two could afford it, especially if you've been together for all that stuff you wrote about. Maybe even just giving each other some time and space will sort some things out, make it so you're stronger for it afterward. Good luck dude, and update TL if any good news.

rotinegg

United States1719 Posts

November 30 2011 22:27 GMT

I recommend getting help. I've been going to therapy for 22 sessions, an hour a week, and if you can get over the whole stigma against going to a shrink, it will be immensely beneficial. If you really open up to your therapist, a lot of subtle things within you that may never have surfaced, but directly affect your behavior and your general attitude towards life come up. I think you should give it a shot; as you said, what's there to lose? So sorry for what you and your (ex)girl had to go through, but don't "fuck" everything; sports (or even just working out everyday) have generally helped keep my mind off of things. Hope you recover soon and reap the benefits of what college life has to offer

MisterD

Germany1338 Posts

November 30 2011 22:40 GMT

no worries, drama/tragedy/love/romance are still categories in most entertainment media, there's not just comedy

also i think you shouldn't worry if she reads this. Can't do any further damage, can it? and i don't think you wrote anything bad. As long as you didn't lie about what you told, she should have almost no (rational) reason to get mad at you.

Darkren

Canada1841 Posts

November 30 2011 22:43 GMT

From what i can tell, i think she is trying to start again(your girlfriend) she fought off the cancer, in big parts thanks to you, but according to what u told us, with her shitty parents, problems etc... she want's to forget the bad and start something new. I think that is what is going trought her head and while you were a good part of her old life ur still and old part she'd like to forget.

KeksX

Germany3634 Posts

November 30 2011 22:46 GMT

Wow, I didn't expect any responses at all! Thanks guys!

@Salv:
Well, I guess if anything happens that is worth to write, I'll do!

@rotinegg:
Mhm... I would really have to look into that a bit, but looking at all this situation, and that this is not the only thing that I have to "worry" about, I'd might consider doing it... I mean, if anything it will prevent me from driving crazy, right?

@MisterD:
No, I didn't lie. Why would I? I know that she is a wonderful woman, but things that happen...do... happen to change you, at least temporarily if not for good. So I'm not really mad at her.
She's still mad though, because of all the stuff I did according to her. But I guess thats just...the "normal stuff".

@Darkren:
That is a little bit too true, I guess. I just wished it wasn't that painful

... But yea, I guess thats the admission part of the blog.
But as I try to see good things in everything, this doesn't mean at all that I can't be a part of her new life, too. You never know what the future brings. And if not, I hope that she has a more ...fortunate future that won't turn into shit. That would make me happy, too.

But thanks for your responses!:D Cheered me up a bit. Just proving that this community is indeed awesome, just writing about it relieves some stress.

Hidden_MotiveS

Canada2562 Posts

November 30 2011 23:15 GMT

Almost all these blogs are so hopeful. I think people write these sad blogs about their life situations to help give themselves a bit more extra hope.

Cuz optimism is beneficial to one's survival and ability to reproduce.

I don't have anything specific to say about your situation, because I feel anything I say would be overly hopeful. I get a perverse image of you guys having a perfect life and everything fucking up, but we all know that perfect lives never really exist, except through our rose tinted glasses.

sniffums

United States21 Posts

November 30 2011 23:30 GMT

Thank you for sharing your feelings with such honesty. I can feel the emotions jump off the page and I teared up a few times. You both shared wonderful experiences together, and you've obviously grown so much from that exchange. Sometimes when two people experience a lot together, to truly find some closure it is easier to part ways. I hope that you can both see the good in what you've been through and truly appreciate each other for these massive life lessons you've offered one another. Thanks for sharing, and from my experience the best part about ending something old, is the beginning of something new. Just don't let the transition in between the two cycles get you down too much. The energy in your life will start moving again, count on it.

nanaoei

3358 Posts

December 01 2011 01:28 GMT

it is more than respectable to be optimistic through emotions that make you curl up and cry.
someone i love has changed in the past to bring something very different to the way we were treating each other, but i wouldn't say it was for the worse either... because you just love them entirely, right?
i don't think you should forget anything about that, that happens to bring even an inch of happiness to you.

being able to stay the same sort of person is also a gift, realizing it, and being able to do this so called, 'moving on with life' may be something that happens as a natural way of life.... but i'm sure you appreciate, and take away all the great experiences you've had. i think you are lucky, and you can look forward to things in a bright way. if not, write here again.
see you on ladder? i won't steal your ladder pts. :D (just burrow *edit* borrow, haha) ^^

ArchDC

Malaysia1996 Posts

December 01 2011 02:04 GMT

#10

Thanks for sharing. I think the main thing in life is to try and live one without regret. Cliche I know, but so long as you honestly feel that you are making the best decision given your circumstances (regardless of the result though that should factor into future decision-making), you should not let any negative result bog you down.

Toopski

United States23 Posts

December 01 2011 02:32 GMT

#11

Thank you for sharing, hats off to you for having the strength to share this. I think you have made a great step in the right direction by doing so. Even if things don't work out always remember to show love for her and never let hate get a hold of you. Also, great job to TL Community for being supportive. I can't think of anywhere else on the interwebs where people are helping people and not tearing them down.

Azzur

Australia6255 Posts

December 01 2011 03:05 GMT

#12

She's also probably going through similar trauma to you now. If you both are committed to getting help and making it work - and it won't be easy - then there will be light at the end of the tunnel. However, if one party is not committed to it, then it won't work. However, this commitment may take time to develop - take time to build this trust and persevere!

KeksX

Germany3634 Posts

December 01 2011 14:13 GMT

#13

Thanks again for your responses. I'm really glad that I posted it, you guys are so nice.
As I said, just talking about it really helped me out.

I really appreciate that I could post this here without getting a shitton of trolls in here. That's really just another evidence of your
awesomeness!:D

As for being sad...Well, I still am and this won't change anytime soon, but posting on teamliquid and doing all this other stuff I have definitely help!

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