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I've decided to finally make a blog after weeks of thoughts about making one I just decided to do it. After completing so many job applications for work I found myself thinking that I should've done this months ago, but only find myself doing it now because of my old mindset; "I'll just do it tomorrow there's always time for that." or "Yeah I was thinking about doing that." and "Still taking it into consideration..." So, because of this past mindset that I have developed the past many years of my life I've begun to change the ways how I plan on doing things in the future for example; instead of saying that I'm thinking of doing something I'm just going to do it (while considering consequences and any bad results that could come out of doing specific actions).
As a result of this new mindset that I am now accepting, I've decided that while I'm waiting for my job applications to process I will be looking for places that I can volunteer in to boost my resume because honestly, I have a lot of free time on my hands and I figured that it'd be okay but in reality it was never okay. I have understood what mistakes that I have made and I plan on fixing what I've done and hopefully will live a more satisfying life and will not be ashamed of myself whenever I look at my poor face in the mirror.
I also plan on changing the way how I look at Starcraft II as well. For months since the release of Starcraft II I have constantly dodged the 1v1 ladders with questionable fears that I can't comprehend. Although I am in Platinum league I have faced vs Master players and Grand Master players and have held my own, in custom matches I have no fear of losing or winning I just try my best to have fun. But in 1v1 ladder I can feel my own hands trembling with fear as the Searching for Players area is flashing and most of the time I am forced to cancel the search just so I can calm myself down and not be terrified of the 1v1 ladder. Another thing in Starcraft II that I know is a huge problem is the fact that I cannot stay with one race. I don't change races because of imbalance or nerfs but I change because of mirror matches and I need to understand that regardless of what race I play there will be mirror match problems. At the moment I'm stuck really playing Random in team games until I can decide what race to play but every day I change the race that I'd like to play roughly 5 times a day. So I've decided that whoever decides to read this blog post will decide the race that I play. Regardless of the race that is chosen I plan on learning that race until Starcraft III comes out (Yes Starcraft III not HotS or Legacy of the Void, I will stay with this race until Starcraft III is released....whenever that may happen (Probably never knowing Blizzard)). People can always tell me to just play Random but honestly I feel that whenever I play random I'm not learning as much as I could if I was just focusing on one race because I'd have to learn 9 different match-ups compared to 3.
Poll: What race to pickTerran (16) 46% Protoss (11) 31% Zerg (8) 23% 35 total votes Your vote: What race to pick (Vote): Terran
(Vote): Zerg
(Vote): Protoss
Anyways for those that have read the blog all the way through thank you very much. Please leave a comment if you'd like. Any and all feedback is appreciated good and bad. This is my first blog :>
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Hey man I understand where you are coming from, I had a blog post about this just several hours ago. The feedback really inspired me to think hard about what race I should play. I thought about it and I loved zerg and have choosen said race. Even if mirror matchups are hard and generally a coin flip, there is nothing you can do about it expect practice and try and try again. Having some friends in skype really helps with the laddering 1v1 too. I used to not be able to hit the search button even when thinking in the morning " awe yeah, today im gonna ladder a whole lot " I would get anxious and just cancel as well. I've changed races every day as well, with over 700 games as each race. Each race has that pro or con you like/dislike. In the end, pick the race you enjoy, the race you get giddy for whilst watching a tournament or stream, the race that you can bond with. I love zergling hugs :3. As for laddering Hit some friends up on skype, or if you dont have some ( :< ) add some TL'ers and get to know them. It really helps having a conversation going in skype to ease the anxiety. glgl hf~
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good read,
just play to improve not to win or lose.
choose Terran! :D or whatever race you feel the best with,
glhf!
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ladder fear is so common it makes my head spin. im positive it stems from placing undue pressure on oneself and far too much importance on Blizzard's ranking system. if, to you, that is the central depiction of your skill level, it can cause major problems in terms of consistency. playing for the first time in a day when you know you'll be rusty or a bit sloppy can be trying for anybody, but the more pressure you apply the harder it is to carry on despite a few quick losses. this same behaviour messes with the mind when running good and bad. it's easy to think yourself godly, and vice versa, when it might simply a case of the matchmaking system giving you opponents you tend to beat or lose to in succession.
i think if you try and look at the content of the games (good actions, bad actions, fixable, mechanical etc.) instead of the ranking before and afterward it will benefit you more. instead of thinking "I knew I wasn't diamond level" or "I used to never lose to platinum players" think about the specific events of that game. Watch the replay. Maybe you're overestimating your skill based off of blizzards imperfect ranking system. Seriously, don't place too much importance on it. you sound like you've played/learned enough to make the judgment call yourself on whether you played well or not.
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I think its so fun that u will pick based on a poll! If i was stuck on random i might choose based on what mirrormatch i like best. Super high level terran would pay off in greatest skill ceiling perhaps, zerg units and speed allow for positioning and maneuvers, and protoss...hmm lol well they get the coolest units in the game! ZERG FTW gl hfhfhf!!
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Well, i am also choosing my race because of mirrors. In brood war i played T so naturally i chooze T when beta came out. But after a while i realized that i REALLY hate tvt, so i switched to zerg, because PvP was another bad mirror, zvz was fun for me. But now situation changed a bit, i really like all the match ups (zvz is a lot of fun for me, so is with tvt), only pvp is still retarded (maybe cuz i don't really understand it that well). So i am always choozing between T or Z. I suggest you to play T, its a lot of fun, and you have a great source for learning (lots of good terrans from korea).
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I feel ya man. I mostly roll random because I can't decide what I like best, but then again, I never expect to be masters.
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From your description of your old attitude you're basically the definition of a procrastinator. Making decisions slowly and changing them quickly. I think you will really benefit from making decisions quickly and changing them slowly. Keep up the good work.
Also, choose the race you like the most. Don't let someone else pick it for you.
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Thank you everyone for posting in the blog. The reason why I have the poll up to just help me pick a race is because to be quite frank...I can't decide myself so I figured why not just let random people pick the race for me. I don't mind whatever race I play because I can have fun regardless but I don't like switching races. I hope to overcome my ladder fear of 1v1s soon I'm just not sure yet but I know the fear will be gone. Once again thanks for voting in the poll and posting! gl hf~
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EPT
