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Bieberphobia

Blogs > Aeres
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Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States6531 Posts
August 24 2011 16:10 GMT
#1
I don't know how it found me, or why it continues to haunt me, but it does. And there's nothing I can do to halt its malevolent advances.

It watches.

For six months it has followed me as a shadow does. For six months it has condemned me to despair, appearing wherever I do.

It waits.

I fear madness will overtake me. This curse is too much to bear. The terror is indescribable. I doubt tha —

NO! IT'S HERE!

+ Show Spoiler +
[image loading]

Fuck this shit. My stepsister is a gigantic Justin Bieber fangirl, and she brought that cardboard cutout of the singer home when she returned from a concert half a year ago. Since then, she's kinda forgotten about it, but my brother found a use for it. He places it in spots that I wouldn't expect it to be in, and since it's fairly lifelike, it tends to creep me the fuck out.

Getting a snack from the pantry? Justin's waiting.

Taking a shit? So is he.

Waking up at 3 AM for whatever reason? Not without Bieber standing in front of your bed.

I really want to destroy the piece of crap, but even though my stepsister doesn't care about the cutout (she keeps it in her closet!), she's loathe to part with it. I'm not sure how to make this shit stop, but I fear my sanity will go before Bieber does.



****
The room is ripe with the stench of bitches!
mordek
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States12704 Posts
August 24 2011 16:13 GMT
#2
Hahahaha. That's awesome. Sorry about your situation ^^
It is vanity to love what passes quickly and not to look ahead where eternal joy abides. Tiberius77 | Mordek #1881 "I took a mint!"
Carapas
Profile Joined February 2011
Canada242 Posts
August 24 2011 16:13 GMT
#3
KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!!!
aphorism
Profile Joined February 2011
United States226 Posts
August 24 2011 16:19 GMT
#4
I feel your pain; some of my friends acquired a life-size cardboard cutout of Edward Cullen and used it for a similar purpose. There's nothing quite like walking out of your front door only to be greeted by his terrifying visage just inches in front of you. :/
Probe1
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States17920 Posts
August 24 2011 16:21 GMT
#5
Superglue a new face on top of it and .. and..
No, on second thought just kill it with fire.
우정호 KT_VIOLET 1988 - 2012 While we are postponing, life speeds by
AzTec
Profile Joined August 2010
Canada178 Posts
August 24 2011 16:30 GMT
#6
5 stars for making me look over my shoulder
ymir233
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
United States8275 Posts
August 24 2011 17:06 GMT
#7
What is with that obnoxious mike...it looks like he's sucking on it constantly.

Your rambling reminded me of this lols....

Now you can play Amnesia: The Dark Descent in your house every day just by looking back at the cutout and losing your sanity. Have fun!

I suggest nuking the cutout from orbit.
Come motivate me to be cynical about animus at http://infinityandone.blogspot.com/ // Stork proxy gates are beautiful.
Amanebak
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
Czech Republic528 Posts
August 24 2011 17:50 GMT
#8
Funny.
I am glad that I live in a bubble and don't see all that fancy stuff, cool trends on TV and internet etc.
I just learned that Justin Bieber is a guy, not a girl! :D
Thanks.
BW
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