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Active: 1296 users

Interactive Novel Writing of A Cliche Story

Blogs > Blasterion
Post a Reply
Blasterion
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
China10272 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-08-11 12:56:17
August 11 2011 04:25 GMT
#1
Foward: After writing that fanfiction I realized my writing has become as rusty as my Starcraft 2 skills so as practice I'll write another novel for fun, and also because of sheer boredom Except it will be written in a Interactive Novel format where each time I will post choices similar to those in Visual Novels and continue writing the route as the choices were made from the polls. You can't really say I didn't rip this off the Blue Creature thread, but hey it gives the activity a life of its own. Making name is going to be hell but whatever. I'll just wing it.

Oh yeah note how I have no creativity, and the story will be incredibly cliche. But that's intentional.

[???]"Oiiiiiiii are you awake?"

Something or rather someone is being loud and obnoxious, Can't a guy get some good rest?

[???]"Hey Shun, Class is over, Everyone is leaving."

I slowly open my eyes.

Then I see a vague image of someone's face.

[Shun]"Just five more min-"

*Kick*

What the fuck? I open my eyes again and sees a familiar silhouette

The person infront of me is a long time friend of mine, Kyle Walker. We used to played alot of Starcraft together and hung out at Net Cafes, Though that kind of has stopped. It seems that somewhere along the way he picked up a job as a writer.

[Shun]"Ugh, damn I am pretty sure there are better ways to wake up someone.."

[Kyle]"None of which are effective against someone like you. Were you up late Laddering again?"

[Shun]"Yeah, I was going to go to sleep after winning one more game but I kept getting cheesed until 3 AM in the morning which I decided to fuck it and just 4 gate someone."

On the Way home....

[Kyle]"By the way did you hear? There was some one trying to form a team in the all girls school downtown."

[Shun]"A team? as in a Starcraft team?"

[Kyle] "Yeah, Apparently their Student Council President is pretty into the game and wants to form a team and are holding some kind of tournament to recruit players, of course it's limited to girls only, But it might be a good opportunity for you."

He just winked at me, how creepy.

[Shun]"Why? doesn't have anything to do with us does it? It's not like I can join a team from a All Girls School."

[Kyle]"I heard the girls from that school are pretty hot, I mean the try out tournament is in an hour, You look pretty feminine to begin with, If we dress you up I bet no one will notice the difference if you don't say anything."

[Shun]"I think I just heard something extremely offensive coming out of your mouth just now"

Kyle leans back

[Kyle]"Don't mind it, Oh and if you are wondering what I get out of this, I been trying to write a novel for a while now, but I couldn't get any good lead way, with the deadline coming up I absolutely need some material for my editor. besides don't you think it would be an interesting turn of events?'

[Shun]"Oi.....you can't be serious..."

[Kyle]" Of course I am. Since when am I not serious?"

Like 75% of your lifespan you've been living. Of all the times to be serious it's something like this?
Dammit If I t comes down to this。。。。

Poll: I should....

Give myself up (16)
 
84%

Run (3)
 
16%

19 total votes

Your vote: I should....

(Vote): Run
(Vote): Give myself up



I should give myself up...

[Kyle]"Seems like you have no objections, so lets change you into this."

He takes a girl's uniform from our school. How does he have that?

[Shun]"Hey Kyle, You're an only child right?"

[Kyle]"Yeah, Is there something wrong?"

[Shun]"What so how did you get that uniform?"

[Kyle]"It's my mom's"

This is absurd. But It's true, Even now Mrs. Walker can probably fit in something like this reasonably well, and still look pretty good. Sometimes I wonder If she stopped aging at 23.

[Kyle]"Don't fantasize about other people's mothers in front of them"

[Shun]"I wasn't!"

[Kyle]"Now, now, don't waste anytime get changed and we should get going."

{After a while}

[Kyle]"Wig check, Uniform check, Stockings check, Perfume ..*sniff sniff* check"

[Kyle]"Hmmmmm I must say to myself this wasn't a bad idea at all, If I didn't know you were a guy to begin with, I'd be asking you out."

[Shun]"Please don't."

How do girls wear this stuff.... it feel awfully breezy down there.

So we took the train downtown to the All Girls School apparently the School is called Etoile. Not that I ever paid attention to things like that.

[Kyle]"Well from now on the stage is yours, give 'em all you got."

[???]"Excuse me, Are you here to sign up for the tournament?"

[Shun] *Nod*

I am careful not to speak, I still haven't found a way to cover up my voice yet. Since I am here already, I am not about to blow my cover and get arrested by the cops for being a pervert or anything.

[???]"Oh my, a shy one are you, I am Karen Steiner, the Student Council Secretary here. Please fill this entry form out"

Hmmmmm Name, School, Race played.... Nothing out of the ordinary. As for name I'll just make something up....Well fuck it just go with Shunko, as I write that down. School... 420th District Public High School.....Race played...
Poll: What race did I play again?

Protoss (9)
 
56%

Random (4)
 
25%

Zerg (3)
 
19%

Terran (0)
 
0%

16 total votes

Your vote: What race did I play again?

(Vote): Terran
(Vote): Zerg
(Vote): Protoss
(Vote): Random



**
[TLNY]Mahjong Club Thread
GTPGlitch
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
5061 Posts
August 11 2011 04:38 GMT
#2
This is the most awkward intro to a story i've ever read 0_o
Jo Byung Se #1 fan | CJ_Rush(reborn) fan | Liquid'Jinro(ret) fan | Liquid'Taeja fan | oGsTheSuperNada fan | Iris[gm](ret) fan |
Thratur
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Canada917 Posts
August 11 2011 04:45 GMT
#3
Gonna go get some popcorn, this is gonna be interesting.
divito
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Canada1213 Posts
August 11 2011 05:01 GMT
#4
I don't know what to vote.

That said, for a "novel," why are there names associated with their speech?
Skype: divito7
GenesisX
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Canada4267 Posts
August 11 2011 05:02 GMT
#5
"give myself up"

gogogo

+ Show Spoiler +
OP, I like your sig :3
133 221 333 123 111
tobi9999
Profile Joined April 2009
United States1966 Posts
August 11 2011 05:08 GMT
#6
omfg l0l
so awkward, gogogo keep going
"tobi is ur iq 9999? cuz i think it might be u so smart wowowow." -Artosis
LlamaNamedOsama
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States1900 Posts
August 11 2011 05:10 GMT
#7
*teen boy going to pretend to be a girl to interact with all-girls' school* Yup, sounds like a Japanese visual novel xD
Dario Wünsch: I guess...Creator...met his maker *sunglasses*
tobi9999
Profile Joined April 2009
United States1966 Posts
August 11 2011 05:12 GMT
#8
On August 11 2011 14:10 LlamaNamedOsama wrote:
*teen boy going to pretend to be a girl to interact with all-girls' school* Yup, sounds like a Japanese visual novel xD



Nah, if it were a Japanese visual novel it would be a girl pretending to be a boy in an all boy school.

And StarCraft wouldn't be involved

obv this more baller
"tobi is ur iq 9999? cuz i think it might be u so smart wowowow." -Artosis
Hermasaurus
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
54 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-08-11 10:25:31
August 11 2011 08:03 GMT
#9
I definitely think that you should bring in more than 2 options if not now then in the future.

edit: The reason that I say this is because I don't like the idea of "If its not black, its white". Instead of just having polar opposites for options, add in some more flavor.

Just for example not suggesting specifics
A) Go along with it
B) Decline
Above are the current two.
C)Counter suggest that he be the one to participate
D)Recruit sister/girlfriend to compete
E)Cut your friend up into little pieces and put him in your freezer for suggesting such non sense

You can run it however you like, but I feel like to really draw interest you have to push your characters. Transgress.
And guess what, you've wandered into our school of tuna and we now have a taste of lion. We've talked to ourselves. We've communicated and said 'You know what, lion tastes good, let's go get some more lion'
KasPra
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Estonia983 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-08-11 10:04:56
August 11 2011 10:03 GMT
#10
On August 11 2011 17:03 Hermasaurus wrote:
I definitely think that you should bring in more than 2 options if not now then in the future.


I agree with this man, it makes it a lot better in my opinion. Apart from the first glance looking very manga'ish or whatever, I think it's a good effort. Hope you'll be able to interestingly unfold the story.

Voted for "run."

Also, please do not make the main character fall in love with another girl player on said team. You know why.
Blasterion
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
China10272 Posts
August 11 2011 12:57 GMT
#11
Alright second part is up
[TLNY]Mahjong Club Thread
Caller
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
Poland8075 Posts
August 11 2011 13:17 GMT
#12
Blasterion can't write.

Here are the first seven lines, written by me, featuring Blasterion as the main character.


There I was, lying in a room with the scent of rather cheap candles in the air, my arms and legs bound to the very bed where I lay. The discomfort and tightness of the ropes that held my wrists was painful. But that pain was overwhelmed by another feeling, one which chose to erect itself by draining the feeling from my hands and feet to concentrate it elsewhere.

Then she walked in, wearing an outfit that barely covered her and yet at the same time seemed almost too much. In her left hand she threw away the few remaining clothes that covered me: with her right, a long, serpentine piece of cowhide dangled, coiled onto the floor like a rattlesnake about to strike. And indeed it struck, lashing out with bites here and there, in a way meant to inflict the most pain without feeling damage. I wanted to cringe at the stinging pain, but I couldn’t help but feel sheer joy at it. Sheer joy at the woman who was now straddling me. She opened those deep, luscious, lips, and her voice came out, nearly as suffocating as the rope around my neck.

“You need to get up now, you fat fuck.”

Years of manipulating people to do what I want them to do kicked in, so I, consumed in my hedonism, proceeded to cry out what I knew would get her to continue.

“Baby, I’m already up.”

The woman frowned for some reason. Was my pun in poor taste, I thought. But no, something else was wrong.

“Seriously bro, get the fuck up.”

The voice sounded wrong now, not like the smoothness of a roll of silk, but instead, the huskiness of a fraternity brother.

That was the last thing on my mind before the woman-whom now looked awfully like a man-twisted her foot at an angle such that her foot landed right on my face. Hard.

“You know, you didn’t have to wake me up like that<” I groaned, clutching my face in sheer pain. This was not the good kind of pain. Instead of getting my blood boiling, my blood was now spilled all over my shirt.
Watch me fail at Paradox: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=397564
Blasterion
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
China10272 Posts
August 11 2011 15:38 GMT
#13
On August 11 2011 22:17 Caller wrote:
Blasterion can't write.

Here are the first seven lines, written by me, featuring Blasterion as the main character.

Show nested quote +

There I was, lying in a room with the scent of rather cheap candles in the air, my arms and legs bound to the very bed where I lay. The discomfort and tightness of the ropes that held my wrists was painful. But that pain was overwhelmed by another feeling, one which chose to erect itself by draining the feeling from my hands and feet to concentrate it elsewhere.

Then she walked in, wearing an outfit that barely covered her and yet at the same time seemed almost too much. In her left hand she threw away the few remaining clothes that covered me: with her right, a long, serpentine piece of cowhide dangled, coiled onto the floor like a rattlesnake about to strike. And indeed it struck, lashing out with bites here and there, in a way meant to inflict the most pain without feeling damage. I wanted to cringe at the stinging pain, but I couldn’t help but feel sheer joy at it. Sheer joy at the woman who was now straddling me. She opened those deep, luscious, lips, and her voice came out, nearly as suffocating as the rope around my neck.

“You need to get up now, you fat fuck.”

Years of manipulating people to do what I want them to do kicked in, so I, consumed in my hedonism, proceeded to cry out what I knew would get her to continue.

“Baby, I’m already up.”

The woman frowned for some reason. Was my pun in poor taste, I thought. But no, something else was wrong.

“Seriously bro, get the fuck up.”

The voice sounded wrong now, not like the smoothness of a roll of silk, but instead, the huskiness of a fraternity brother.

That was the last thing on my mind before the woman-whom now looked awfully like a man-twisted her foot at an angle such that her foot landed right on my face. Hard.

“You know, you didn’t have to wake me up like that<” I groaned, clutching my face in sheer pain. This was not the good kind of pain. Instead of getting my blood boiling, my blood was now spilled all over my shirt.

Maybe you can write for me =P
[TLNY]Mahjong Club Thread
Hesmyrr
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Canada5776 Posts
August 11 2011 16:14 GMT
#14
On August 11 2011 22:17 Caller wrote:
Blasterion can't write.

Here are the first seven lines, written by me, featuring Blasterion as the main character.

[EXCERPT]

So where's the cliche?
"If watching the MSL finals makes you a progamer, then anyone in Korea can do it." - Ha Tae Ki
Gao Xi
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
Hong Kong5178 Posts
August 11 2011 18:05 GMT
#15
Why protoss?
龔智禮 _________________________________________________________________________________________________ CJ NATION
Blasterion
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
China10272 Posts
August 11 2011 18:27 GMT
#16
On August 12 2011 03:05 Gao Xi wrote:
Why protoss?

Hell if I know, I am not the one voting
[TLNY]Mahjong Club Thread
GenesisX
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Canada4267 Posts
August 15 2011 05:52 GMT
#17
lets continue this
133 221 333 123 111
KazeHydra
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
Japan2788 Posts
August 15 2011 06:04 GMT
#18
lol this really is pretty cliched...continue.
"Because I know this promise that won’t disappear will turn even a cause of tears into strength. You taught me that if I can believe, there is nothing that cannot come true." - Nana Mizuki (Yakusoku) 17:36 ils kaze got me into nana 17:36 ils by his blog
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