Parent rage blog part 10 - Page 2

On April 03 2011 03:12 iamho wrote:
Dude I love your blogs, makes me feel so much better about my relationship with my parents :p

On April 03 2011 05:47 adeezy wrote:
The kids like 17/18, not everyone drinks when they are 15. I reccomend trying it before you go to college. That way you aren't socially awkward or shunned.Youre gonna be dealing with it in college you might as well.

On April 03 2011 05:47 adeezy wrote:


What you are dealing with is typicalc oming of age stuff so just grab the balls to do it and go to prom, go to the party, drink and get tipsy (don't get wasted), and just have fun.

On April 03 2011 07:41 StorkHwaiting wrote:
I can't read this. Where are the paragraphs

On April 03 2011 04:20 evanthebouncy! wrote:
Okay, i think your problem is this:

You don't realize how much control/power you actually have over yourself. Your mom is not inherently bad person, actually when I read your blog (I'm asian myself) I kinda understand what she's doing and why she's doing it (thank god my mom doesn't do that that much, but she does a little so I can relate).

The idea is this, your mom wants you to be a responsible adult, which, by itself, is all the right thing and the best thing to wish for for anyone. Now where she doesn't realize is that to be responsible she has to give you room to manage yourself, and let you make your own decision and face consequences. I don't think she knows that your decision is going to be suboptimal in the beginning, so she freaks out each time you try to manage it yourself and you didn't handle the situation well enough, and take the management responsibility into her own hands, and start to manage everything for you and be controlling.

What you need to do is first be responsible for your own shit. The cycle is vicious in that the more she cares about your shit the LESS you care, and the more she gets crazy which is no good, but her rage is now justified because you really didn't care for yourself. I read your blog and it seems she's quite crazy, which partly means she really doesn't give you any chance to manage yourself and make mistakes, and learn to handle the consequences. But in the other part, it also means you have not been responsible yourself.

So, start handling your own things a bit more WITHOUT your parents having to tell you, make a decision on which UC you want to go, have clear reasons why (It could be all the wrong reasons when you re-think it later but as day9 says, make a decision based on what you have now is better to have no decision). Explain why to your parents, and in general have a clear clear idea what you are going to do and why you are doing it.

If your parents doubt your decision, talk to them about it, be patient and let them understand why it actually is not bad. Now you might come out either winning or losing the argument, but that is not important. The important thing is to know if their suggestion is valid or not, and which UC you really should go based on the collective knowledge. If you think you know more and your decision is correct but CANNOT convince your parents you are correct, try to go to that U.C. anyways and insist on your judgement.

Overall there's a lot of parent rage blogs I've read, but I don't think in a single one you motivated that you were trying to actively make a decision for yourself and your parents shut it down. So it seems you can still do that, so start making some decisions and grow up a little, once your parents seen you make the right calls they'll realize you can handle things yourself, and leave you alone. Basically how it is for most every one. Parents didn't used to trust my judgement, but they gave me some room to grow and manage, I made the right calls, now they trust me and let me manage everything.

For me it was something like... mom used to yell a lot, then I go to college and want to study computer science, then dad yelled at me a lot saying don't do it but I realized I would not be happy studying other subjects so I made up my mind and did it anyways. Now they are very proud of me for doing that. It's incredible how much power your parents DONT have when it comes to the choices you make in life. They can only FAKE control, FAKE that power, but in the end all they do is still a suggestion, and opinion on their half, and in the worst case maybe mind twists and guilt trips to control you. But if you are responsible and know what you want, they really don't get to do ANYTHING on the choices you make because they know it is you who will call the balls.

So yeah, start actively making some decisions buddy. and know what you want out of life. If you can't do those you will continued to be bitched upon and manipulated by your parents.

On April 03 2011 09:36 Cedstick wrote:
evanthebouncy! gave you some good advice, which you seem to acknowledge. On the social front, just fucking do it. Don't hesitate, find a girl and ask, go to that party -- don't regret not regretting

On April 03 2011 05:47 adeezy wrote:
The kids like 17/18, not everyone drinks when they are 15. I reccomend trying it before you go to college. That way you aren't socially awkward or shunned.Youre gonna be dealing with it in college you might as well.

If you don't want to get rejected out-right. Ask some friends to ask girls like, hey would you go with froadrac(well obviously your real name), to prom? That way you just don't end up asking a billion girls and looking desperate.

What you are dealing with is typicalc oming of age stuff so just grab the balls to do it and go to prom, go to the party, drink and get tipsy (don't get wasted), and just have fun.

On April 03 2011 09:42 Froadac wrote:

Can't. Will be in socal @ tours. Next time though I'll try. but I suspect my parents will call her parents, and I shall not go

And I would indeed actually like to go to prom; I just find it bizarre my mom is pestering me to go, considering she's generally antisocial. in terms of an afterparty though, the prospects are very grim.

On April 03 2011 10:00 Z3kk wrote:
My faith in humanity has been bolstered by the responses to this thread ^^

Definitely go to prom, and while you're at it, convince you-know-who to go as well lolol

Isn't it a good thing that you've never been to a party with drinking? It's illegal right ? :| Or maybe you meant just general partying/drinking soda or something :D

On April 03 2011 10:38 Joementum wrote:


It depends on who you ask if it's a good thing . I know in my high school, drinking when you were a Freshman was no big deal and everyone did it. It was quite funny because everyone that drank got so fucked up they didn't remember the night. I never really understood the point of doing that other than being the cool person at the party. Getting buzzed is so much better than getting fully smashed. I was the guy that went to very few parties and didn't drink though. Haha.

On April 03 2011 13:32 Masamune wrote:
I'm not gonna write up a long reply because it's going to be harsh and you're gonna ignore it...

but if you're going to take any advice from me, please take this: when you select a university, make sure it's as far away as possible from your batshit-insane mother.

second: study something in school that you like, not what will please your folks. Chances are if you end up majoring in something that you're weak at but that they want you to do, it's gonna ultimately end up bad.

On April 03 2011 13:52 Froadac wrote:

Exactly. Although I actually would read it lol.

My parents want me to do engineering, but they are actually being fairly accepting for once about my choice to do econ/something else, possibly some asian language .<

And I'm going to socal: at least.