This weekend things were going well. On Friday I did a 27 page PowerPoint. On Saturday I wrote a 3200 word summary of the Mormon journey to Utah. I wrote the first 2 minutes of a 3 minute speech. Today I was sort of burned out, and played a game of StarCraft 2 this morning. In which I got drone/zergling rushed… But that aside… My dad randomly started yelling. Evidently I had my priorities screwed up: I was playing before working.
^What my parents want me to do
What the fuck? I have this entire week off, so that’s like saying I played last night, before I worked today. So I went to schedule an appointment at the DMV, found something, but thought I’d messed up the type of appointment. Turns out I had the right one, but it wasn’t available when I went back. I felt bad, but oh well. They open up the next day’s appointments tomorrow. My parents however felt otherwise. They wouldn’t pull me out of school for literally 10 minutes so that I could take it. It was my fault, because I had played this morning I hadn’t got the slot. (I was waiting for some friends to get back to me on which DMV to avoid, because there is one where evidently they fail a ton of people)
^The cause of my problems
So then the discussion goes in a random direction. I have a friend who is currently in India. He said it was hot, buggy, and he’d be surprised if he didn’t get malaria. My mom proceeded to blast him, saying he hasn’t been through anything, blah blah blah. Then proceeds to say “Well, at least he cares about school” They continually said well, because you played this morning you don’t care about school. They then faultily extrapolate this to mean that I don’t want to go to college, and only want to play video games. A little farfetched to accuse someone who has written over 9,000 words in two and a quarter days. So anyways, they started talking, and before I knew it they said how immature I was, and about how I shouldn’t even have a driver’s license. So yeah, I’m not going to have a driver’s license until I’m 18. (Or until I convince them otherwise)
In strangely good news they are now convinced that I’m psychopathic and so have arranged for me to see a counselor. I have a feeling that when I see him/her I’ll come out on top. I’m fairly sure I’m not psychopathic, but I do think talking about ripping off your child’s head is a little psycho.
Help section: My parents keep on pulling this bullshit where they say “You know we care about you asshole son, so why don’t you talk to us.” Generally they ask some stupid probing question like “Why are you playing before you are working blah blah blah” I’ll respond because I have time, and it’s not a big deal. Then they get mad, so I’ve just over time learned to not say anything, and when they rant just say OK. Now though, they are employing the most BS technique ever. Basically interrogation. You aren’t leaving your room until you talk to us. I talk; I get yelled at, et al. How should I answer these impossible questions such as “Why are you not working as much as you could” and “what can we do to help”?
Man my parents used to be like that, then they softened up. IDK why, but I definitely work harder now; weather it's because I have more work or because I just didn't appreciate working for my parents is the real question.
my dad was like that.. always when i did something for fun, he'd rant at me like "at least go an earn money with it". i was like 12 years old. sure thing.
well, up to today, that has changed at least. My dad found fun somewhere in life and now he's a pretty okay guy. But i am also left with not talk a lot to my parents about things, too. I think it is because of this shit, that kind of distanced myself from them cause they'd complain about anything i did. I am not sure if its that much of a bad thing though. Sure, its not great. But there are worse things i guess.. And yeah, of course from that situation, its super inconvenient when you are bugged by them but always feel like not wanting to talk to them really.
up to now, i am at a stage where i usually just respond something like "nothing new" if i'm asked about how i am or something. So there are these awkward moments, but they pass pretty fast then. So, one option you have is just enduring through it until you made them be used to it enough to just stop digging around if you don't give a real answer to their initial questions. One can live this way i think, even if it's probably not the best there is. But well, what is.
I hope someone else is able to give you some advice to better ends ;p
Hold them to the same standards they hold you to. Then again your parents sound insane so that may not be the best idea. You could ask the counselor to explain to your parents that their constant screaming and frothing at the mouth level of insanity isn't having the desired effect on your education
My parents were almost that bad.I just said Don't worry about it your only stressing me out and making me not want to do my work so please go away and if its not done then u can bitch but till then stfu
On November 22 2010 07:16 FindingPride wrote: My parents were almost that bad.I just said Don't worry about it your only stressing me out and making me not want to do my work so please go away and if its not done then u can bitch but till then stfu
Yeah. I said that. THey maintained that experience has told them I won't get things done. This is from like 6 years ago: now they always just rant at me to do things :/
On November 22 2010 07:16 FindingPride wrote: My parents were almost that bad.I just said Don't worry about it your only stressing me out and making me not want to do my work so please go away and if its not done then u can bitch but till then stfu
Yeah. I said that. THey maintained that experience has told them I won't get things done. This is from like 6 years ago: now they always just rant at me to do things :/
I eventually did what you did and i just go along with their games and dont let it stress me. I just agree. but i suppose thats why they are sending you to a counselor. The counselor will probably help you on dealing with the stress of how retarded your parents are acting. I use to have a counselor. Dont worry about it, i'm sure things will improve. Also keep in mind if you are not an adult your parents will most likely require your counselor to tell them the things you discuss in session. Just tell him how stressed you are with how retarded they are acting and im sure things will get much better.
Have you tried ignoring them completely? I don't mean like nodding and saying yes while ignoring them in your head, I mean like ignoring them flat out, not responding to them at all.
Being straight honest, my folks were like that until I moved out. Then, about 7-ish years after said move out, they managed to apologize once a year, every year, for being utter cunts back when. Frankly, I never let their original cuntness bother me that much (stress, closeness, etc.) so no apology is really needed.
Point being, they sound super high strung. Lay low until you can move out.
My parents are the exact same way. They would get way too angry whenever I'd play games or whatever and said if I was gonna play games, I'm better off playing with friends or something outside. So I did that and eventually they get angry over that saying I'm wasting my time and when I look back at it, I was wasting my time. I shouldn't have played and I could have probably gotten more scholarships or working more hours part-time if I didn't screw around so much in High School. Your parents just want you to succeed and a lot of parents with high expectations have this. My parents still nag even though I'm in college but I had a good talk with them that basically cleared all the life-controlling. When I was 17, I had a talk with them basically saying, "You can tell what to do, you can tell me to do more work, stop playing the computer, stop going out during the weekends, but I make all my decisions. Do you really think I'm not taking school seriously and that I would really fail or something?"
Try saying that to your parents with some variation or something. When I told them that, they knew they trusted me enough that I held academics and my future career high enough because they really trusted me. I think a lot of parents who want to really control their children's lives in their mid teenage years just don't trust their kids enough to use their time well enough.
My parents were like this. Then I proved to them that I can play games, and basically do nothing with my life, and still get the marks and performance they wanted and expected. Now I tone it down and switched hobbies around, but they still give me the freedom to do what I want. Your parents only want to know that you care and that you're capable. Show them it. Don't assume they know it.
I've just read your last 3 parent blogs and I have to say your parents have serious psychological problems. You should try to convince them to get counseling, for their sake if not for yours, it can't be healthy to be that crazy.