New Idea:
Commercialized Medicinal Tape Worm - Administered to anyone i deem fatty fat fat. Genetically modified to die after about 3 weeks - Pro Version lasts for 5 weeks (2.5x cost). Causes you to lose 10-15lbs - then buy another tablet/pill so you don't put it back on.

Sell rights to Kraft Foods for xMillion$. Becel Margerine NOW WITH TAPE WORM. Feel less guilt when eating fat food. Big Mac with TW hold the pickles.

Obesity Crisis Solved. Health Crisis Solved.

You're Welcome

DoctorHelvetica

United States15034 Posts

September 22 2010 20:28 GMT

ill take 10

Archas

United States6531 Posts

September 22 2010 20:29 GMT

Give the man a Nobel prize.

s.a.y

Croatia3840 Posts

September 22 2010 20:30 GMT

side effects ?

LaLuSh

Sweden2358 Posts

September 22 2010 20:30 GMT

Mods are so going to close this blog.

United States2921 Posts

September 22 2010 20:31 GMT

obesity yes, health no. People who eat shitty will still have unhealthy bodies even if the fat is taken out. You need your vitamins yo. Maybe you can genetically engineer the TW to eat fat and then shit out vitamins. Nice idea anyways.

NukeTheBunnys

United States1004 Posts

September 22 2010 20:31 GMT

Some one beat you too it

also its illegal in the US

Edit: woooo post #420, I should have planed this out better

Kennigit

Canada19447 Posts

September 22 2010 20:32 GMT

Oh fuck. Raped

HwangjaeTerran

Finland5967 Posts

September 22 2010 20:34 GMT

I´m sorry but there´s already a trusted and better solution on the market.
They call it: eating less.
But I bet you´d have better PR and pwn the world anyway.

Edit, wat is this 420 post probe ?!

SpicyCrab

402 Posts

September 22 2010 20:39 GMT

#10

I like the tag line

"No diets" - Hmm... okay, I guess that would be pretty conveinent.

"No exercise" - Well, who wants to be active any way?

"No baths" - What?

Emon_

3925 Posts

September 22 2010 20:40 GMT

#11

Edit - Nevermind. All wight loss is good weight loss from an aesthetic pov. Though people should exercise instead of eating and taking worms

Revolt

United States288 Posts

September 22 2010 20:43 GMT

#12

On September 23 2010 05:30 LaLuSh wrote:
Mods are so going to close this blog.

are you unaware that his nametag is darkblue?

Tabbris

Bangladesh2839 Posts

September 22 2010 20:43 GMT

#13

patent that shit Quick!

Alou

United States3748 Posts

September 22 2010 20:49 GMT

#14

Pretty sure this has been tried before and due to mutations isn't exactly safe. One can dream though.

BroOd

Austin10833 Posts

September 22 2010 20:50 GMT

#15

Hi, Chilly Mays here. Are YOU sick and tired of trying to lose weight? Impossible diets have your head spinning?

[frustrated man slams frozen diet dinner into the garbage on verge of frustration tears]"THERE'S GOT TO BE A BETTER WAY," he wails in desperation.

Well now there is! Introducing the Diet Worm: a military-grade, scientifically engineered creature that takes all the hassle and frustration out of losing weight. Our proven weight-loss method will have you in Bikini shape in no time! Here's how it works:

[scientific looking demonstration including infra-red model of human]
The worm embeds itself into your small intestine, scarfing down excess food before it hits your notorious "trouble zones," wearing down those fat reserves faster than any diet on the market today. You're free to enjoy life while our patented creature goes to town on all those fatty nutrients.

[hot actress spins and accentuates a toned midsection]
No more meal plans, no more hours at the gym, just pop in a worm and start living the way you've always dreamed. Here's how to order:

Some people may experience side effects when taking tape worm. Frequent side effects include impacted bowels, thinning of the blood, rapid calcium decomposition, vertigo and lupus. Other common side effects include yellowing of the skin and eyes, thoughts of suicide or an increased desire to gamble. In uncommon cases, there have been reported incidents of mania, an increased desire to rape or torture and some hair loss.

Hidden_MotiveS

Canada2562 Posts

September 22 2010 20:52 GMT

#16

And what happens after the people get skinny? You'll get a lot of angry families sueing you for the deaths of their pudgy loved ones. I'd reccomend you declare bankrupty before that happens (first do some tests on subjects to determine how long it takes) and then move to somewhere like Oklahoma to hide.

Oh, and you'll want to bribe the FDA the way macdonalds does to get this on the market again.

Kennigit

Canada19447 Posts

September 22 2010 20:54 GMT

#17

On September 23 2010 05:52 Hidden_MotiveS wrote:
And what happens after the people get skinny? You'll get a lot of angry families sueing you for the deaths of their pudgy loved ones..

I already covered this by genetically modifying the worm to die after 3 weeks.

AoN.DimSum

United States2983 Posts

September 22 2010 20:56 GMT

#18

On September 23 2010 05:43 Revolt wrote:

Show nested quote +

are you unaware that his nametag is darkblue?

he was kidding...