[Let's Play] Pokémon Volt White Nuzlocke Run - Page 9

Sure, why not. Let's all go stand in front of the group of hooded guys who look high as shit and may or may not have laser guns.



BAD GUY DETECTED



The only liberation my Pokemon are getting is death. Eventually.



If these tentacle porn tapes come out right, it'll be more than just a want/need relationship.



According to the last four generations and literally every episode of the TV show, it is. Who are you to claim otherwise, creepy eyepatch man?



Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. My friend has a desk job at Silph Co. over in Saffron, and his Caterpie keeps getting punched by his boss's Machop because it's funny or something. That shit's gotta stop, man.



WHY ARE YOU PEOPLE LISTENING TO THIS LYING MOTHERFUCKER?

OH RIGHT, PLOT DEVELOPMENT, OF COURSE



Oh please, humans are superior to Pokemon in every way*. Why should we owe them anything? That's nonsense.

*Except for, you know, the "every way" part.



Oh, I get it now. You weird guys must be really big fans of the Beastie Boys. You're fighting for the right for Pokemon to party! That's a noble cause. Sorry for my misgivings before, I totally approve now.



Wow, you guys are trash. And here I was thinking you were devout followers of the Beastie Boys' ideologies, and now you're spouting garbage about equality? Get out of my house.



Oh, oh! I think I get it now! You're conducting this mad scheme of advertising around the country to fulfill your own secret nefarious plans to conquer the world!



... Nah, couldn't be. That's silly.



Hell yeah, Younger Man! I like the way you think.

Whoa, a Pokemon whisperer?! That's awesome! What's Fagtron500 saying? Does he like his name?? THIS IS SO COOL!!



He actually does. All of this guy's dialogue in the game is played really fast for some reason. Not sure why. Maybe he's a qualified speedtalker or something.



Man, if only Cheren saw things the way I do. He could be talking by proxy to his little shitty dudes right now. Lost opportunities...



Wow, bragging about his psychic powers. I'm not sure I like this guy.



Especially not when he has a name guaranteed to belong to a psycho rapist or something. Or he's a total hipster who wants to use a one-character name before it becomes cool.



Cheren, why are you telling a total stranger what our names are? Didn't your mom tell you not to do that when you were a kid?



And didn't she also tell you not to tell total strangers what you're doing and where you're going?



SURELY SHE TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL TOTAL STRANGERS ABOUT YOUR LIFE'S DREAMS??

God, you're an idiot.



That's the plan. I need a buncha Pokemon to replace the ones that die in my name.



Not if I can help it.



Whoa whoa whoa, he's coming on to us! He is a psycho rapist! I NEED AN ADULT!!

+ Show Spoiler [Boss Battle #1] +

I hope not. If they do, they might actually rebel against me and tear me into thousands of pieces for my crimes against them. That would be pretty unfortunate.



So, you're a creepy psycho rapist Pokemon whisperer who attacked me for no reason, and you also a name-dropper?? Jeez, how low can you get?



... Well, that was kinda bizarre. And did you notice he has green hair? Would he really stoop so low as to be a member of GreenPeace too?



I dunno about you, but I'm worried. He attacked me, not you. What if he's targeting me? T_T



Wow, nice one. You managed to explain the exceedingly obvious and reveal your intentions to creepy hipsters all in a subtle tutorial for the player. That was slick.



Why is he my friend? Whatever. I guess I'd better follow the insanely linear path that my friend is commanding me to go in and go to Striation City to battle the first Gym.



BUT BEFORE I DO THAT I TOTALLY FORGOT SOMETHING IMPORTANT!!



Damn. :/