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TL.net Ten Commandments - Page 10

Forum Index > TL Community
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Mora
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
Canada5235 Posts
Last Edited: 2004-09-21 15:58:20
September 21 2004 15:57 GMT
#181
u had some errors

u suck.

baal sucks

u shoudl both be banned .

edit - im desperately clinging to that hammer of thor.
Happiness only real when shared.
BroOd
Profile Blog Joined April 2003
Austin10831 Posts
September 21 2004 16:52 GMT
#182
On September 22 2004 00:20 tfeign wrote:
-post-

Good or bad? I know I haven't written any long essays since my high school days so I'm very rusty


There's a very fine line between eloquent, detailed writing and just plain verbosity. The idea is always to get the most amount of detail with the least amount of words. Oftentimes when trying to insert superfluous words, you end up with akward phrases, syntax errors and tense disagreement. Some of your sentences are needlessly unwieldy and cumbersome. I'm trying not to be too 'English-teacher' here on you, but if you'd like specific examples, I could get more in depth.
ModeratorSIRL and JLIG.
tfeign
Profile Joined June 2004
United States2980 Posts
Last Edited: 2004-09-21 17:37:56
September 21 2004 17:26 GMT
#183
This old post is unavailable due to an encoding issue. Please contact an admin if you would like this post restored for historical reasons.
baal
Profile Joined March 2003
10540 Posts
September 21 2004 17:45 GMT
#184
On September 22 2004 00:57 Teroru wrote:
u had some errors

u suck.

baal sucks

u shoudl both be banned .

edit - im desperately clinging to that hammer of thor.


actually you suck... literally hehehe
Im back, in pog form!
BroOd
Profile Blog Joined April 2003
Austin10831 Posts
September 21 2004 18:02 GMT
#185
Some corrections that I would make to this at a glance:

Never have I(I've never) had even the slightest idea about(notion of. notion and idea are synonyms, but notion is more appropriate when talking about your conception of something) any mixed emotions about FA, yet regardless of that, I have still always found that it’s quite wearisome(irksome) to witness him inscribing(simply 'writing' would do here, as inscribing carries the connotation of physically applying the message on a surface in a relief style) a series of three, or even four consecutive posts in various threads. For me(redundant) I have always believed in the excellence of one’s post to lie in the value of one’s ideas within that post. For this reason, if I ever had to append to my ideas in a post, I would always rely in that brilliant utility we’ve come to know as(on) the edit command in order to amend or supplement(amend covers it) any ideas that I need.

Nevertheless, it is also very apparent to recognize(clear. 'to recognize' doesn't fit there at all) how the presence of FA in the forums can lend to a small decline of the monotony abound within this forum(just too verbose. A simple 'bring variety' would suffice).

On the other hand, I reflect on(although 'consider' could be better) ArbiterFrolix as an outstanding reporter. His pleasant usage of words and expressions greatly complements to the excellence of his reports. The first time I had laid my eyes on AF’s game report, it had hit me right at that instant(we already know when it happened from a few words ago) that this guy would turn out to be an absolute hit(success, etc. you just used 'hit').

However, don’t misjudge my words(a little akward. 'Get me wrong' might be better). My intention would never be meant(is not) to put down the rest of TL’s reporters, as I believe that they were all superbly chosen to fit their roles as best as they could, and are performing some of the most admirable jobs in the community.(this last sentence seems a little snide, but I don't know if that was your intention)


These 'corrections' are incomplete, and many are subjective, but I believe in they work in the spirit of making the writing more technically and aesthetically pleasing.
ModeratorSIRL and JLIG.
Arbiter[frolix]
Profile Joined January 2004
United Kingdom2674 Posts
September 21 2004 20:27 GMT
#186
On September 21 2004 18:45 Rt-S.FakeSteve wrote:
ARBITERFROLIX IS A VALUABLE COMMODITY WHICH WE MUST HOARD


I only just saw this little missive. *sniff* You... guys... are wonderful.
We are vigilant.
Klogon
Profile Blog Joined November 2002
MURICA15980 Posts
September 21 2004 23:46 GMT
#187
Haha, I love the direction this thread has took. :D
tfeign
Profile Joined June 2004
United States2980 Posts
Last Edited: 2004-09-22 01:11:42
September 22 2004 01:08 GMT
#188
snide: Derogatory in a malicious, superior way

How is my last sentence a derogatory comment in any way? I am complimenting everyone, not putting anyone down.
BroOd
Profile Blog Joined April 2003
Austin10831 Posts
September 22 2004 02:34 GMT
#189
On September 22 2004 10:08 tfeign wrote:
snide: Derogatory in a malicious, superior way

How is my last sentence a derogatory comment in any way? I am complimenting everyone, not putting anyone down.


I believe that they were all superbly chosen to fit their roles as best as they could, and are performing some of the most admirable jobs in the community.

Generally, when you say someone is doing 'the best they can', it's not in a complimentary way. It suggest that there's some higher level of performance that, for them, is unattainable. While that may be an intrinsic characteristic to almost any situation, to say it seems very disparaging.
ModeratorSIRL and JLIG.
STIMEY d okgm fish
Profile Joined August 2003
Canada6140 Posts
September 22 2004 03:28 GMT
#190
This old post is unavailable due to an encoding issue. Please contact an admin if you would like this post restored for historical reasons.
Tien
Profile Joined January 2003
Russian Federation4447 Posts
September 22 2004 04:29 GMT
#191
lol stimey.
We decide our own destiny
tfeign
Profile Joined June 2004
United States2980 Posts
Last Edited: 2004-09-22 05:01:41
September 22 2004 04:48 GMT
#192
On September 22 2004 11:34 BroOd wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 22 2004 10:08 tfeign wrote:
snide: Derogatory in a malicious, superior way

How is my last sentence a derogatory comment in any way? I am complimenting everyone, not putting anyone down.


I believe that they were all superbly chosen to fit their roles as best as they could, and are performing some of the most admirable jobs in the community.

Generally, when you say someone is doing 'the best they can', it's not in a complimentary way. It suggest that there's some higher level of performance that, for them, is unattainable. While that may be an intrinsic characteristic to almost any situation, to say it seems very disparaging.



No Brood, I meant to say that the people that were chosen to do reports were chosen as good as they can be. What I'm saying means the decisions that were made were as good as they could be. "As best as they could" as directed to the decisions and selections of the reporters, not directed toward their performances. The second sentence is directed toward their performances, and clearly so:

and are performing some of the most admirable jobs in the community
TeCh)PsylO
Profile Joined October 2002
United States3552 Posts
September 22 2004 07:36 GMT
#193
Stimey has returned, with a vengance!
People change, then forget to tell each other - Susan Scott
BroOd
Profile Blog Joined April 2003
Austin10831 Posts
Last Edited: 2004-09-22 08:25:37
September 22 2004 08:25 GMT
#194
On September 22 2004 13:48 tfeign wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 22 2004 11:34 BroOd wrote:
On September 22 2004 10:08 tfeign wrote:
snide: Derogatory in a malicious, superior way

How is my last sentence a derogatory comment in any way? I am complimenting everyone, not putting anyone down.


I believe that they were all superbly chosen to fit their roles as best as they could, and are performing some of the most admirable jobs in the community.

Generally, when you say someone is doing 'the best they can', it's not in a complimentary way. It suggest that there's some higher level of performance that, for them, is unattainable. While that may be an intrinsic characteristic to almost any situation, to say it seems very disparaging.



No Brood, I meant to say that the people that were chosen to do reports were chosen as good as they can be. What I'm saying means the decisions that were made were as good as they could be. "As best as they could" as directed to the decisions and selections of the reporters, not directed toward their performances. The second sentence is directed toward their performances, and clearly so:

Show nested quote +
and are performing some of the most admirable jobs in the community


I understand what you meant to say, I'm just telling you that how you wrote it lends itself to an ambiguous interpretation. The phrase 'As best they could' seems to refer back to how they 'fit their roles', not how they were chosen. While it's clear to me what you meant, a syntax error like that could easily confuse someone. A simple rephrasing would clear it up. Perhaps I believe that they were all superbly chosen as best as possible to fit their roles, and are performing some of the most admirable jobs in the community would read a little better.
ModeratorSIRL and JLIG.
SyntaxError
Profile Joined January 2003
Mexico432 Posts
September 22 2004 08:26 GMT
#195
like george carlin would say ...that was artificially inflated to make it to 10...half of those are bullshit and are irrelavent.
Do you serve a purpose or do you purposely serve?
tfeign
Profile Joined June 2004
United States2980 Posts
Last Edited: 2004-09-22 14:18:31
September 22 2004 13:08 GMT
#196
This old post is unavailable due to an encoding issue. Please contact an admin if you would like this post restored for historical reasons.
Onvear
Profile Joined September 2004
Sweden55 Posts
September 23 2004 00:30 GMT
#197
--- Nuked ---
BroOd
Profile Blog Joined April 2003
Austin10831 Posts
September 23 2004 08:41 GMT
#198
On September 23 2004 09:30 Onvear wrote:
And... some people need to go outside more often!


Oh my! Aren't you a clever little girl?
ModeratorSIRL and JLIG.
Riho
Profile Joined October 2002
United States120 Posts
September 23 2004 16:46 GMT
#199
Klogon wrote. "Haha, I love the direction this thread has took. :D"

What is amazing, is how hungry and ungrateful people can argue over a free meal and a warm bed to rest in.
insert useless important quote here using invisible ink
FakeSteve[TPR]
Profile Blog Joined July 2003
Valhalla18444 Posts
September 24 2004 07:20 GMT
#200
please dont refer to me as 'a free meal and a warm bed to rest in'
Moderatormy tatsu loops r fuckin nice
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