Now, I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a clan war by dying for his team. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his team.

Men, all this stuff you've heard about America not wanting to fight the Europeans, wanting to stay out of the clan war, is a lot of horse dung. Americans, traditionally, love to fight. All real Americans love the sting of battle.

When you were kids, you all admired the champion Donkey Kong player, the fastest Mario speed-runner, the big league Street Fighter players, the toughest SNES nerds. Americans love a winner and will not tolerate a loser. Americans play to win all the time. Now, I wouldn't give a hoot in hell for a man who lost and laughed. That's why Americans have never lost and will never lose a clan war. Because the very thought of losing is hateful to Americans.

Now, a clan is a team. It lives, eats, sleeps, fights as a team. This individuality stuff is a bunch of crap. The bilious bastards who wrote that stuff about individuality for GosuGamers don't know anything more about real battle than they do about fornicating.

Now, we have the finest food and equipment, the best spirit, and the best men in the world. You know, by God, I actually pity those poor bastards we're going up against. By God, I do. We're not just going to shoot the bastards. We're going to cut out their living guts and use them to grease the treads of our tanks. We're going to murder those lousy Hun bastards by the bushel.

Now, some of you boys, I know, are wondering whether or not you'll chicken-out under fire. Don't worry about it. I can assure you that you will all do your duty. The Europeans are the enemy. Wade into them. Spill their blood. Shoot them in the belly. When you put your hand into a bunch of goo that a moment before was your best friend's face, you'll know what to do.

Now there's another thing I want you to remember. I don't want to get any messages saying that we are tied. We're not tying anything. Let the Hun do that. We are advancing constantly and we're not interested in holding onto anything -- except the enemy. We're going to hold onto him by the nose, and we're gonna kick him in the ass. We're gonna kick the hell out of him all the time, and we're gonna go through him like crap through a goose!

Now, there's one thing that you men will be able to say when you get back home, and you may thank God for it. Thirty years from now when you're sitting around your fireside with your grandson on your knee, and he asks you, "What did you do in the great beta clan War?" -- you won't have to say, "Well, I shoveled shit on Battle.net."

Down with those tight-jean wearing, hair-product using, siesta having commies across the pond. U S A U S A. Open a McDonalds in every European school! A Wal-Mart in the kitchen of every European home! An extra 20 pounds on the waist of every European!

Alright now you sons-of-bitches, you know how I feel.

chobopeon

United States7342 Posts

April 13 2010 18:26 GMT

#109

On April 13 2010 18:38 minus_human wrote:
Wow chobopeon made a reference to one of the most annoying memes in a news post. Pretty cool I think

i didn't bring it up

EGLzGaMeR

United States1867 Posts

April 13 2010 18:33 GMT

#110

On April 14 2010 00:27 Liquid`NonY wrote:

Show nested quote +

lz and i dont have a grudge haha. where did you get that idea?

lol apparently i now have grudge match(?)'s with nony and idra.. even though i dont have a grudge ^___^ Goodluck Tyler here's to having some Good games!!

thunk

United States6233 Posts

April 13 2010 18:39 GMT

#111

Jinro =/= FA in my heart. It still confuses me.

Louder

United States2276 Posts

April 13 2010 18:45 GMT

#112

On April 14 2010 03:33 Lz wrote:

Show nested quote +

lol apparently i now have grudge match(?)'s with nony and idra.. even though i dont have a grudge ^___^ Goodluck Tyler here's to having some Good games!!

The way you two kissed goodbye in Dallas, I'd think you have exactly the opposite of a grudge.

oo_xerox

United States852 Posts

April 13 2010 18:48 GMT

#113

DID JINRO SAID HE WAS IN Dream.t) in sc1? Like THE KOREAN CLAN? Holy shit............. tl.net imba

DwmC_Foefen

Belgium2186 Posts

April 13 2010 19:00 GMT

#114

I choose Euro side ^^

Goooooooo Liquid yay

(Nevertheless, I'm always rooting for Belgians or dutchies

)

Aelfric

Turkey1496 Posts

April 13 2010 19:09 GMT

#115

You are gonna see who is your elders are yankees...

Ilikestarcraft

Korea (South)17727 Posts

April 13 2010 19:13 GMT

#116

On April 14 2010 03:48 oo_xerox wrote:
DID JINRO SAID HE WAS IN Dream.t) in sc1? Like THE KOREAN CLAN? Holy shit............. tl.net imba

is jinro frozen arbiter?

NonY

8748 Posts

April 13 2010 19:15 GMT

#117

On April 14 2010 04:13 Ilikestarcraft wrote:

Show nested quote +

is jinro frozen arbiter?

yeah he was in dream.t) and yeah he's frozenarbiter. wanna hear more amazingness about team liquid? sangho offered me to join Shield (bisu[shield], sea[shield], etc) and i turned him down in favor of keeping the liquid tag. easiest choice of my life

7mk

Germany10157 Posts

April 13 2010 19:18 GMT

#118

On April 14 2010 03:33 Lz wrote:

Show nested quote +

lol apparently i now have grudge match(?)'s with nony and idra.. even though i dont have a grudge ^___^ Goodluck Tyler here's to having some Good games!!

rofl stop BMing Nony plz