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Welcome everyone to the second ever edition of "Disciple's Top 11". For the unfamiliar with the concept, this is where I list various things, without putting them in a particular order. Just the Top 11 of stuff I find interesting. You can check the previous edition Here. The theme of this post is
Top 11 manliest games of all time
Hell Yeah, and without further delay, lets jump right into this hot topic, which I think everyone of you have their own opinion about, I've tried to cover as many genres as possible
Carmageddon
I cannot think of a computer game with cars, which is going to thrill your girlfriend, but the Carmageddon series are in a class of their own. Fun races and cars, cool locations, plenty of weapons, but most importantly a lot of blood and gore. The game is just so involving, and as a player you will always feel motivated to find the most brutal and creative way to kill the poor pedestrians on the road. The formula for this game is pretty simple but it will definitely strike right into the heart of any male gamer.
Duke Nukem 3-D
This would be the FPS on my list. The reason why I've picked it over L4D or another survival shooter is because Duke is a timeless classic and a role-model for a whole generation. As a game Duke Nukem came out when the FPS genre was still something new and underdeveloped, but even thou its gfx belong to the stone age, the game is really enjoyable to play even today due to its brilliant macho sense of humor. Duke Nukem is so badass, he will fuck Master Chiefs little sister and then rape the Master Chief himself for good measure.
MS Flight Simulator
I will admit, there might be some crazy chicks out there, who love brutal games and will find even the sickest FPS enjoyable to play. But no female will possibly find anything interesting in the Flight Simulator series. The sheer complication of the game and its absolute dullness will discourage many dudes from playing it as well. But this doesnt mean the game is bad. Its target audience is very specific and for sure it has no girls in mind. I think its safe to say that even thou the Flight Simulator is not the funnies manly game you could play, you have to admit, it does take some balls to even try it for an hour or two.
Championship Manager
Football is definitely the reason why a lot of couples broke up. It takes a lot of time and dedication to follow all the leagues and championships in Europe alone, to be in pace with everything, not to mention all the betting that goes along. Girls are against all that, but Championship Manager is the cherry on the cake - it is the game you can go completely macho obsessed about. Unlike Fifa, where you control a mini Ronaldo, in CM you just stare at some excel tables for hours and get angry over a script - very manly indeed.
GTA
Although the original version and the sequel were somewhat cute and girlfriendly, the most recent installments are entirely focused on men. I've always liked the old games better, but one has to admit GTA is pushing all right buttons - being a thug-pimp, fucking babes with fake boobs and meanwhile driving cars is very manly indeed. Still, I really think the series went too mainstream and lost a lot of their original charm. Discuss.
God Of War
There were plenty of cool action console games before GoW, but the trilogy is up there due to its really cool story, fast pace and involving gameplay. Kratos managed to cement his place in the pantheon of the manliest games ever made by being as violent and brutal as possible. And just when you thought it cant possibly get more brutal than that, the gamedevs decided to dig even deeper and came out with Dante. GoW however will always remain the pioneer in the segment and everything that comes after it will simply be a clone. Besides, my choice not to pick Dante's Inferno over GoW has something to do with the next game on the list.
7 Sins
As far as concept goes this game is a bit hard to describe. Basically you are this guy who must fuck as many chicks as possible and abuse all seven deadly sins in order to climb up the social ladder. The game revolves around the idea, that as man, everything is allowed and acceptable. Its easily one of the most targeted on men games ever made and it doesnt even try to hide it. I will be surprised if there was a single woman on the gamedev team. If you've never heard of this game, go try it out.
Full Throttle
What men often dream about is freedom. Not the William Wallace concept about it of course , but
the big Harley on Route 66. If Monkey Island was too gay for you, try out Full Throttle - its a Baker-Adventure with an interface, similar to the early MI games. With cool story and great characters, Full Throttle is the classic choice for calm and relaxing macho gaming experience.
Der Planer 3
This is it, the dark horse on the list. Basically its an econ simulator where the player runs a small logistics firm. The game is aiming to achieve complete realism in its gameplay and there are plenty of stuff you will understand only if you have management as your major. Der Planer 3 has absolute no sense of humor, I would hardly call it a game even, but then again its not an activity a girl would waste time with. The terrible and user unfriendly interface is also doing no good. This shit demands a lot of dedication. Men only.
Commandos
One of my favorite series of all time. Slow paced, lots of thinking and tactics, WWII. Commandos is the daddy of Call Of Duty and Medal Of Honor and it was really so sad to see it trying to be their wannabe with the latest installment - Commandos: Strike Force. Despite the latest flop, the first three games are a must for any male gamer with self-respect.
Contra
You thought StarCraft will show up here, but it wont. As manly as it is, it still causes asian babes to scream on national television over a match between two skinny nerds. Contra on the other hand must be THE manliest game ever made and I'm sure many ppl will say exactly the same. Its raw, its basic and above else - it was really difficult. Everything about this game, the concept, the gameplay, the weapons, is macho. One may argue that Contra is one of the games with the biggest gaming culture influence ever to be made. Contra is just made with balls.
So this was it, as I said I tried to cover as many genres as possible and not get too much into a particular segment. Feel free to disagree with my choices
At the end of this "Disciple's Top 11" I give you a small Bonus:Top 3 most girly games ever made
The Sims
Arguably the game that brought the girls into playing games. There isnt much to say about it, but one things for sure - it really tries hard to be liked by the chicks, especially with the latest versions. Tbh I have mixed opinion about it, I would never devote time playing it, but I dont see is as the cancer of the gaming world as well
World of Warcraft
And yes... If you trust the stats, more than 20% of the players today are girls. The main reason for it besides the friendly and cheerful looks and interesting gameplay is the fact that WoW is actually a really big social service, similar to facebook where you can chat and meet new ppl. Maybe not the girliest game as concept but it definitely offers plenty of stuff the girls are interested about.
The Settlers
They are just sooooo cuuuuteee....
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