You probably won't care about this.

I was wandering iccup, asking for games and such. I was doing pretty well this season, after clearing stats since I played at korean hour during the start of the season for a while. 7-1 at this point. Half won by cheesing. Two won against funnybananaman. Lost 1 to a korean guy.

So on I go, creating my next game, 1vs1 D/D+.

John_Stewart has joined the game.

I`m spawning as Zerg at the bottom right, in the glorious colour of brown.

John_Stewart (I bet he`s a boring guy real life) spawns at the top right in teal, and sends his probes mining.

Early game goes by. I choose to go 12 hatch since it`s a four player map, but using maphacks, John scouts me first, and despite passing my scouting drone, I fail to see the probe at first. Therefore, I make the 10, 11 and 12 drones, instead of opting into an overpool build.

Failure to notice

And he can go nexus first.

I try to sneak some lings through his base, but his cannons are up in time so I am unable to do so. Kinda stuck, being behind a lot, I go expand to try and nullify this disadvantage.

When in doubt, expand like mad.

This gets spotted out right away by a scouting probe, but thankfully, angry religious Johnlots do not come to burn down the pulsating poop blob right away. I transition into my standard 5 hatch hydra build.

Not knowing what is going on at my bases (the meowing was getting bothersome so the probe was executed by the Zergling guards), he sends a bunch of Johnlots to try and divulge my secrets through painful means.

The following pictures were taken during the public torture and interrogation of neobowman. If you wish to donate to the save neo fund, please call 416-416-4164.

After finally escaping from the torture chamber, I was in fairly bad shape. I had my third expo running well, but a lot of drones were killed and I wasn`t mining from my nat for a while. Plus, with a high tech security zergling, I had spotted this going up.

Unfortunately, the security zergling was soon also executed by the merciless Johnlots. RIP, posthumously named Tom, the security Zergling.

John had amassed a fairly large army by now, and I had nowhere near the amount of forces he did.

I had cleverly expanded a fourth time however, in anticipation for the (yet another) disadvantage I would have.

I am clever. Yes I am. Shut up.

Still, John came crashing down upon my expansion. Humourously, for over 10 seconds, the Johnlots were stuck behind the wall being attacked by sunken colonies.

There were insufficient defenses however, and soon he killed everything there. One EVIL templar had 10 drone kills.

Serial killer on the loose. RUN DRONES, RUN!

Knowing I would not be able to defeat his forces head on, I instead went for a counterattack at his natural. This turned out surprisingly effective, as he had all his forces at my third base, and I managed to snipe off both his main and natural nexi, while killing a good deal of reinforcement troops. Sadly, I lost my third base, but miraculously, my fourth base was still up, and John had surprisingly not moved in to kill it. Perhaps he did not notice.

One nexus down

Two nexi down

I had sacrificed most of my army in exchange for most of his economy. He did not lose many forces in his attack, but he only killed one expansion. At this point, it was 1 expo for John vs 3 expo for me, but he had a much bigger army. Just trying to recover his economy by planting down both his nexi again would still put him behind since I would just reexpand to my destroyed third base. Thus, he went for rebuilding his main nexus and attacked.

[image loading]

Losing all my mutas to snipe two or three templar

Being attacked

FLANK

I manage to clean up the attack with around a dozen hydralisks left. Now, at this point, John has no Army, and one expansion with his main nexus being rebuilt. There was a small timing window where I could have attacked his third expansion and killed the probes before his reinforcements came to clean up the attack, but I hung back, and tried to wait my eco advantage out. If I had simply massed up a lot of hydraling at this point, I probably would have won. Instead, I massed mutalisks.

Missing a golden templar sniping opportunity

I manage to do a good amount of damage to his economy. It did take some time to build up the mutalisk number however. I did have a better economy so this was (I thought at the time) in my favour.

Managed to kill all the probes at the base in exchange for around 6 mutalisks. Not a bad trade I`d say.

The time it took to make the mutas let him macro up however, and once again, he came crashing down upon my natural. I had managed to expand to the in between expo though, which he never noticed. This time though, the attack was a lot more effective.

My remaining mutas were all killed by two storms, and I did not have many hydralisks left. Both my main and natural were killed.

Yeah, I was kinda screwed. I managed to rebuild most of my tech at my fourth base, which is now my main.

Unfortunately, due to my eternal harass of his main, he was running off of two base, and not one, since his main was not dry yet. I had three base, so economically, we were equal, but he had a much larger army. He proceeded to use his army advantage to expand to his natural again, and to a fourth. I couldn`t move out, and he macroed his army really really big.

Other half is in his main.

Eventually, I was on 3 base vs 4 base and behind on upgrades, so had to attack. I had built up a decent force of utlraling, but had neglected to get defilers (again). The following is what happens.

Lost the battle since I was caught by surprise by his army and couldn`t flank, and I had no defilers.

Screenshot from actual game.

Later, I checked his iccup rank (No Caffeine, just this once since it was a good game) and what do you know.

I think I played pretty damm well against a B+ player. Who went 79-22. I built up a good amout of minerals at one point but it was still a nice back and forth match imo.

And if you doubt me, go check.
John_Stewart

And replay if you want it

Edit: P.S. For those who don`t know, I`m C- at best.

yhnmk

Canada630 Posts

December 31 2009 06:36 GMT

dont have time to look at the replay, but it kinda sounds like you through the game away.

lokiM

United States3407 Posts

December 31 2009 06:46 GMT

why do you use tilda instead of apostrophe?
the apostrophe is located on the left of the enter key

Bibbit

Canada5377 Posts

December 31 2009 06:46 GMT

The second I saw that made up phone number I knew you were from my area

Thegilaboy

United States2018 Posts

December 31 2009 06:49 GMT

Sounds like you had fun with it, and that's really what counts. But yeah, 'grats on holding your own against a B+

neobowman

Canada3324 Posts

December 31 2009 06:49 GMT

On December 31 2009 15:46 lokiM wrote:
why do you use tilda instead of apostrophe?

Keyboard gets screwy sometimes. `comes out instead of apostrophe. Used to be only after a game of StarCraft and would go away after I closed SC. Doesn`t seem to be stopping right now though. Could be problematic. I can`t use questionmark, less than, greater than, square brackets, or colons right now either.

lokiM

United States3407 Posts

December 31 2009 06:50 GMT

wtf? ive never heard of that problem and I've been on computers since i was 8 years old

Bibbit

Canada5377 Posts

December 31 2009 06:53 GMT

On December 31 2009 15:49 neobowman wrote:

Show nested quote +

I had this before and a friend of mine fixed it for me. Hold ctrl and press shift. Sometimes you have to do it twice but it fixes it.

neobowman

Canada3324 Posts

December 31 2009 06:54 GMT

On December 31 2009 15:53 Bibbit wrote:

Show nested quote +

I had this before and a friend of mine fixed it for me. Hold ctrl and press shift. Sometimes you have to do it twice but it fixes it.

Oh wow, that worked. <3. Now I won't have that problem anymore. I used to not be able to whisper to people on iccup because of that XD.

ghostWriter

United States3302 Posts

December 31 2009 07:03 GMT

#10

I did care about it actually.

It was a very nice writeup, good description and nice pictures.
The end was a nice twist.
Thanks for doing this, it was a good read. 5/5

Oystein

Norway1602 Posts

December 31 2009 07:07 GMT

#11

John is our very own Liquid.Drone.

Carnivorous Sheep

Baa?21244 Posts

December 31 2009 07:08 GMT

#12

I wept a tear for Tom. RIP, Security Zergling.

Titusmaster6

United States5937 Posts

December 31 2009 07:10 GMT

#13

Congrats on a game worth remembering! Great screenshots as well.

neobowman

Canada3324 Posts

December 31 2009 07:10 GMT

#14

On December 31 2009 16:07 Oystein wrote:
John is our very own Liquid.Drone.

I heard from someone that he was you. Meh. Liquid.Drone it is.

LuckyFool

United States9015 Posts

December 31 2009 07:11 GMT

#15

Ah nice! I thought it was Oystein hehe.

iNcontroL

USA29055 Posts

December 31 2009 07:18 GMT

#16

haha nice job

Put up a good fight vs liquid.drone

29 fps

United States5724 Posts

December 31 2009 07:18 GMT

#17

nice. i like the extra storyline, like those johnlots.

and john stewart COULD be his real name

Comeh

United States18919 Posts

December 31 2009 07:26 GMT

#18

There is something funny about imagining John Stewart's head on a bunch of zealots, marching towards your base.

d(O.o)a

Canada5066 Posts

December 31 2009 07:31 GMT

#19

On December 31 2009 15:49 neobowman wrote:

Show nested quote +

haha sounds worse than having my keyboard changed to the canadian settings.

TheAntZ

Israel6248 Posts

December 31 2009 07:37 GMT

#20

That you put up such a good fight against drone is impressive!
Also the way you made all the screenshots and descriptions is great, someone'd have to be a dick not to care :p