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Top 100 Religous Quotes

Blogs > Chill
Post a Reply
1 2 Next All
Chill
Profile Blog Joined January 2005
Calgary25993 Posts
January 14 2008 15:53 GMT
#1
http://209.85.165.104/search?q=cache:http://www.fstdt.com/fundies/top100.aspx?archive=1

Examples:
One of the most basic laws in the universe is the Second Law of Thermodynamics. This states that as time goes by, entropy in an environment will increase. Evolution argues differently against a law that is accepted EVERYWHERE BY EVERYONE. Evolution says that we started out simple, and over time became more complex. That just isn't possible: UNLESS there is a giant outside source of energy supplying the Earth with huge amounts of energy. If there were such a source, scientists would certainly know about it. [emphasis added]

I am a bit troubled. I believe my son has a girlfriend, because she left a dirty magazine with men in it under his bed. My son is only 16 and I really don't think he's ready to date yet. What's worse is that he's sneaking some girl to his room behind my back. I need help, God! I want my son to stop being so secretive!

I often debate with evolutionists because I believe that they are narrow mindedly and dogmatically accepting evolution without questioning it. I don't really care how God did what He did. I know He did it.

If u have sex before marriage then in Gods eyes u are married to that person if a man rapes a woman in Gods eyes they are married it sucks for the girl but what can we do lol


****
Moderator
fusionsdf
Profile Blog Joined June 2006
Canada15390 Posts
January 14 2008 15:57 GMT
#2
lololololololol
SKT_Best: "I actually chose Protoss because it was so hard for me to defeat Protoss as a Terran. When I first started Brood War, my main race was Terran."
Krohm
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
Canada1857 Posts
January 14 2008 16:22 GMT
#3
I'm not going to read all of those. Other than what you've posted... but wow. Those people are morons.

Funny as hell too though haha especially the top one.
Not bad for a cat toy.
born-to-porn
Profile Joined January 2004
Denmark400 Posts
January 14 2008 16:29 GMT
#4
"I can sum it all up in three words: Evolution is a lie"

-JohnR7

Haha all of these quotes are just stupid on so many levels
Nobody beats the Beater
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32127 Posts
January 14 2008 16:35 GMT
#5
my brother has vowed to never talk to this one girl he's been bangin again after a drunken convo on saturday night.

He and a bunch of his friends were in my basement. They were all drinking and my mom just walked in and came down to say hello and walked into this convo. 'His girl goes something to the extent of I don't believe in evolution, I definitely didn't come from monkeys.'

One of his friends who is stuyding to be a doctor over at Drew University—and who also happens to be an abbrasive dick when he wants to get a point across—starts laughing uncontrollably in the corner and is biting his tongue so hard to not say anything.

Then he snaps and he's like what do you mean, you don't believe? There's nothing to believe, it's a studied concept. If you don't believe in that, you don't believe gravity, etc etc. He tells her there's tons of proof, citing basic stuff such as bacteria becoming resistant to certain drugs, and says that even though there's some holes, the amount of proof makes it pretty undeniable and that those gaps are just things we haven't learned yet.

The chick then goes on how she doesn't believe in bacteria and drugs, saying that it's all just a lie made up by pharmacuetical companies to exploit you. She says sickness is a result of demons in your body and that the only way to be healed is by god. Everyone, including my mother, started laughing after hearing this, and she went upstairs because she started to feel bad becaues she knew the chick was about to get torn to shreds.

The dude, who is a catholic, made it known that he believes in god n goes to chruch, but told her she's a fucking idiot if she believes that and will only accept studied scientific concepts soemtimes. The whole arguement ended up with her leaving out in a hissy fit and my brother dying laughing.
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
samachking
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
Bahrain4949 Posts
January 14 2008 16:36 GMT
#6
Amazing
Thank you
"And then Earthlings discovered tools. Suddenly agreeing with friends could be a form of suicide or worse. But agreements went on, not for the sake of common sense, or decency, or self preservation, but for friendliness."
Jibba
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
United States22883 Posts
January 14 2008 16:37 GMT
#7
God revealed to me two things about the timing of the rapture. God specifically told me 2007 was the year, because I was only going to have from 3 to 3 1/2 years to spread the message after my book was published.

Shelby Corbitt, 2007rapture.com [Comments (206)] [2008-Jan-01]



ModeratorNow I'm distant, dark in this anthrobeat
RaGe
Profile Blog Joined July 2004
Belgium9950 Posts
January 14 2008 16:44 GMT
#8
oh man some are hilarious
Moderatorsometimes I get intimidated by the size of my right testicle
zer0das
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States8519 Posts
January 14 2008 17:19 GMT
#9
HOLY CRAP THE SUN WHAT IS THIS MADNESS.
Asta
Profile Joined October 2002
Germany3491 Posts
January 14 2008 17:55 GMT
#10
On January 15 2008 01:37 Jibba wrote:
Show nested quote +
God revealed to me two things about the timing of the rapture. God specifically told me 2007 was the year, because I was only going to have from 3 to 3 1/2 years to spread the message after my book was published.

Shelby Corbitt, 2007rapture.com [Comments (206)] [2008-Jan-01]






I don't get that one. Is there more to it than the "two things"? Anyway, the first one in the OP is unbelievable. They guy must have left his house one sunny day and immediately either shot himself or turned atheist. :D
RzzE
Profile Joined August 2007
Germany20 Posts
January 14 2008 18:03 GMT
#11
Here is an amazon.com review on Precalculus for Christian Schools
Some of the examples are pretty funny if you ask me.
+ Show Spoiler +

This book is an example of eisegesis gone berserk.

To get mathematics in line with the precepts of fundamentalist Christianity, the authors have tried to fuse mathematics with fundamentalist theology -- and have succeeded in straining their credibility to the breaking point.

Cases in point:

"Carl Friedrich Gauss first proved the fundamental theorem of algebra. There are many fundamental theorems: of arithmetic, calculus, and so on. These are so fundamental that many other theorems are derived from them. In the Bible, there are also fundamentals, without which Christianity would not exist: the deity of Christ, His substitutionary atonement, and the inspiration of the Bible, to name a few."

"A line can be described either by its slope (a ratio) or by its inclination (an angle). These terms describe the deviation from the horizontal, but the word inclination also has a non-mathematical meaning. Without Christ, man is inclined to sin. The Word of God should shape our attitudes (inclinations)."

"If you are given the length of two sides and the angle measure opposite one of those sides, you can use the law of sines to solve the triangle. However, this does not always determine a unique triangle. As a result, it is called the ambiguous case. Ambiguous means open to multiple interpretations. Some people say that you can interpret the Bible in any way that you want. However, there is no ambiguity in the Bible."

"A person is eccentric if his behavior deviates from normal. Jesus Christ expects His disciples to be eccentric, since living a Christlike life is not normal in this world (Titus 2:14). Likewise, in mathematics, conic sections are eccentric if they deviate from a circle. Eccentricity is a measure of this deviation. The eccentricity of an ellipse (e) is the ratio of focal distance (c) to the length of the sentimajor axis (a): e = c/a. Since c and a are distances and c < a, the eccentricity of any ellipse is 0 < e < 1.

"The concept of limit can be used to illustrate an important truth. Suppose you lived eighty years and there was no life after death; your life on the earth would be 80/80 = 1 = 100% of your existence. Now, let's assume that your life after death was eighty years long: your earthly life would be 80/160 = 1/2 = 50% of your entire existence. If life after death were 720 years, your life here would be only 80/(80+720) = 0.1 = 10%. Now extend it to eternity: (the limit as x approaches infinity) 80/(80+x) = O. In other words, this life is very insignificant in light of eternity. It is no wonder James said that life is "vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away."

This book does a gross disservice to both mathematics and the Scriptures. I would not recommend its use in ANY school -- religious or secular.
Snet *
Profile Blog Joined September 2006
United States3573 Posts
January 14 2008 18:10 GMT
#12

several million years for a monkey to turn into a man. oh wait thats right. monkeys dont live several million years.

loooooooooooooooooooool evolution gg'd
fight_or_flight
Profile Blog Joined June 2007
United States3988 Posts
January 14 2008 18:14 GMT
#13
On January 15 2008 03:03 RzzE wrote:
Here is an amazon.com review on Precalculus for Christian Schools
Some of the examples are pretty funny if you ask me.
+ Show Spoiler +

This book is an example of eisegesis gone berserk.

To get mathematics in line with the precepts of fundamentalist Christianity, the authors have tried to fuse mathematics with fundamentalist theology -- and have succeeded in straining their credibility to the breaking point.

Cases in point:

"Carl Friedrich Gauss first proved the fundamental theorem of algebra. There are many fundamental theorems: of arithmetic, calculus, and so on. These are so fundamental that many other theorems are derived from them. In the Bible, there are also fundamentals, without which Christianity would not exist: the deity of Christ, His substitutionary atonement, and the inspiration of the Bible, to name a few."

"A line can be described either by its slope (a ratio) or by its inclination (an angle). These terms describe the deviation from the horizontal, but the word inclination also has a non-mathematical meaning. Without Christ, man is inclined to sin. The Word of God should shape our attitudes (inclinations)."

"If you are given the length of two sides and the angle measure opposite one of those sides, you can use the law of sines to solve the triangle. However, this does not always determine a unique triangle. As a result, it is called the ambiguous case. Ambiguous means open to multiple interpretations. Some people say that you can interpret the Bible in any way that you want. However, there is no ambiguity in the Bible."

"A person is eccentric if his behavior deviates from normal. Jesus Christ expects His disciples to be eccentric, since living a Christlike life is not normal in this world (Titus 2:14). Likewise, in mathematics, conic sections are eccentric if they deviate from a circle. Eccentricity is a measure of this deviation. The eccentricity of an ellipse (e) is the ratio of focal distance (c) to the length of the sentimajor axis (a): e = c/a. Since c and a are distances and c < a, the eccentricity of any ellipse is 0 < e < 1.

"The concept of limit can be used to illustrate an important truth. Suppose you lived eighty years and there was no life after death; your life on the earth would be 80/80 = 1 = 100% of your existence. Now, let's assume that your life after death was eighty years long: your earthly life would be 80/160 = 1/2 = 50% of your entire existence. If life after death were 720 years, your life here would be only 80/(80+720) = 0.1 = 10%. Now extend it to eternity: (the limit as x approaches infinity) 80/(80+x) = O. In other words, this life is very insignificant in light of eternity. It is no wonder James said that life is "vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away."

This book does a gross disservice to both mathematics and the Scriptures. I would not recommend its use in ANY school -- religious or secular.

That is amazing. Anything that helps kids learn math is ok. Is there a pdf of this somewhere?
Do you really want chat rooms?
foeffa
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
Belgium2115 Posts
January 14 2008 18:23 GMT
#14
O M G. :|
觀過斯知仁矣.
Jibba
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
United States22883 Posts
January 14 2008 18:31 GMT
#15
On January 15 2008 02:55 Asta wrote:
Show nested quote +
On January 15 2008 01:37 Jibba wrote:
God revealed to me two things about the timing of the rapture. God specifically told me 2007 was the year, because I was only going to have from 3 to 3 1/2 years to spread the message after my book was published.

Shelby Corbitt, 2007rapture.com [Comments (206)] [2008-Jan-01]






I don't get that one. Is there more to it than the "two things"? Anyway, the first one in the OP is unbelievable. They guy must have left his house one sunny day and immediately either shot himself or turned atheist. :D

"God specifically told me 2007 was the year"

It's dated 1/1/2008. So God lied to her.
ModeratorNow I'm distant, dark in this anthrobeat
fight_or_flight
Profile Blog Joined June 2007
United States3988 Posts
January 14 2008 18:38 GMT
#16
On January 15 2008 03:31 Jibba wrote:
Show nested quote +
On January 15 2008 02:55 Asta wrote:
On January 15 2008 01:37 Jibba wrote:
God revealed to me two things about the timing of the rapture. God specifically told me 2007 was the year, because I was only going to have from 3 to 3 1/2 years to spread the message after my book was published.

Shelby Corbitt, 2007rapture.com [Comments (206)] [2008-Jan-01]






I don't get that one. Is there more to it than the "two things"? Anyway, the first one in the OP is unbelievable. They guy must have left his house one sunny day and immediately either shot himself or turned atheist. :D

"God specifically told me 2007 was the year"

It's dated 1/1/2008. So God lied to her.

Isn't that the date from the website?

They probably grabbed it on the first of the year before she took it down.
Do you really want chat rooms?
Jibba
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
United States22883 Posts
January 14 2008 18:46 GMT
#17
On January 15 2008 03:38 fight_or_flight wrote:
Show nested quote +
On January 15 2008 03:31 Jibba wrote:
On January 15 2008 02:55 Asta wrote:
On January 15 2008 01:37 Jibba wrote:
God revealed to me two things about the timing of the rapture. God specifically told me 2007 was the year, because I was only going to have from 3 to 3 1/2 years to spread the message after my book was published.

Shelby Corbitt, 2007rapture.com [Comments (206)] [2008-Jan-01]






I don't get that one. Is there more to it than the "two things"? Anyway, the first one in the OP is unbelievable. They guy must have left his house one sunny day and immediately either shot himself or turned atheist. :D

"God specifically told me 2007 was the year"

It's dated 1/1/2008. So God lied to her.

Isn't that the date from the website?

They probably grabbed it on the first of the year before she took it down.

Either way he's a lying son of a bitch.
ModeratorNow I'm distant, dark in this anthrobeat
Romance_us
Profile Joined March 2006
Seychelles1806 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-01-14 19:07:15
January 14 2008 19:03 GMT
#18
OMG ROFL...

"so you think if no one believed in any religion there would be no wars or fighting? i think it would be worse. i know if i didn't fear god's judgement i would have killed many many times."

Some of these people are truly fucked up.
Notes and feelings, numbers and reason. The ultimate equilibrium.
SilenTLurker
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
United States250 Posts
January 14 2008 19:21 GMT
#19
Read the whole thing. Pure comedy.
-I don't like infanticide. ~Why not? -Kids aren't good business, Remy.
skyglow1
Profile Blog Joined April 2005
New Zealand3962 Posts
January 14 2008 19:45 GMT
#20
I couldn't read the whole thing because it was just too painful. The one about that father whose son came out to him then killed himself is pretty sad though
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