On March 30 2017 00:08 nojok wrote:
Interesting read but the whine about your hours, wtf? 8 to 5, same hours every day, never working during week-ends, let alone nights, you have no idea how lucky you are, really.

There is usually always someone who has it worse.

merz

Sweden2760 Posts

March 30 2017 18:36 GMT

#22

You seem to have missed my point. I don't complain about the hours per se as in 8 hours a day. I complain on the fact that I needed to be there on set time (8 AM - 5 PM) every single day, week in and week out and this meant I had no control over my daily schedule because It locked me in from 8 AM - 5 PM.

My current work requires me to work 60 hours a week every so often, what I meant was that I'm a much more happier person if I get to chose WHEN I put in those 60 hours (say I start 10 AM and quit 9 or 10 PM every day).

Clarification:

I don't complain about 8 hours being "too long" I complain about the fact that employers insist on forcing their employees to work between two set times. I can gladly put in 10+ hours a day if required if I only get to dictate when that happends during the day. And I think people would be a lot happier if they could. Say you need to drop kids off to school or have a dentist appointment at 9 AM. Every day life would just be so much easier for people. Now like I said this cannot be applied to every job but to most jobs where you do your work from your laptop/smartphone through an internet connection it can.

nanaoei

3358 Posts

March 31 2017 01:56 GMT

#23

i read the whole thing,
i remember your sick apm
good luck merz.

ROOTFayth

Canada3351 Posts

March 31 2017 16:59 GMT

#24

Enjoyed the read

Why don't you start your own thing though? Can't you do that?

merz

Sweden2760 Posts

April 01 2017 08:55 GMT

#25

On April 01 2017 01:59 ROOTFayth wrote:
Enjoyed the read

Why don't you start your own thing though? Can't you do that?

Ty!

There's a part three coming up, we'll see

CursOr

United States6335 Posts

April 01 2017 15:58 GMT

#26

I had a HelpDesk job where I answered phones for people using our online app 3 days a week, and 2 days a week replicated bugs, did regression testing and worked on documentation.

Sounds almost exactly like the job you described here. I feel for you man.

also, self destruction? either you are going somehwere totally different with this, or, you and I have a totally different definition of self destruction

(also, bro, an employee works for an employer. the employer pays the money to an employee who does work. I think it was flipped a couple of times in the blog here. good stuff, sorry to be "that guy")

merz

Sweden2760 Posts

April 02 2017 05:49 GMT

#27

On April 02 2017 00:58 CursOr wrote:
I had a HelpDesk job where I answered phones for people using our online app 3 days a week, and 2 days a week replicated bugs, did regression testing and worked on documentation.

Sounds almost exactly like the job you described here. I feel for you man.

also, self destruction? either you are going somehwere totally different with this, or, you and I have a totally different definition of self destruction

(also, bro, an employee works for an employer. the employer pays the money to an employee who does work. I think it was flipped a couple of times in the blog here. good stuff, sorry to be "that guy")

In the sense of self destructive behaviour. Ya I mess em up a couple of times, I dont speak nor write English that much anymore and its taken its toll. But I know the difference, just sloppiness :/

CursOr

United States6335 Posts

April 03 2017 06:34 GMT

#28

I'm from America, and you write english better than me. Though, that probably won't surprise anyone :p

dragoon

United States695 Posts

April 03 2017 23:11 GMT

#29

look forward to seeing the next installment merz! i love you man, some dark shit happens sometimes but i dont think you're such a prick.

he who casts the first stone, right?

Uzikoti

16 Posts

April 08 2017 06:13 GMT

#30

Part two was as good as part one ---> very good !
Count on me to read the next parts when they come out !

Go merz go !

DickMcFanny

Ireland1076 Posts

April 09 2017 20:08 GMT

#31

I'm lost, did you say anywhere which pro you are? Or should that be obvious from context?

merz

Sweden2760 Posts

April 10 2017 07:18 GMT

#32

On April 10 2017 05:08 DickMcFanny wrote:
I'm lost, did you say anywhere which pro you are? Or should that be obvious from context?

Follow the links

IntoTheStorm

116 Posts

April 12 2017 16:29 GMT

#33

Wow, some things have a striking resemblance to what's going on in my life. Just to share this opinion of mine, when I read "self destruction" and saw the author, I remembered watching and enjoying some of his games back in the day and I felt a stab of sadness. I thought merz was doing drugs of selling them or some alcohol problems.

On March 26 2017 20:11 dignitas.merz wrote:
We slowly regressed to one of those couples who both work 8 AM – 5 PM then come home, and suddenly have no energy to spend on each other. We stopped doing things together on weekends, we started prioritize hanging out with friends or doing personal hobbies on Saturdays and Sundays rather than spending time with each other. Somewhere along the line we were so busy with managing our everyday life that we forgot why we lived together and I forgot why I took up the god damn job in the first place.

Yeah, this is what happened between me and my now ex-wife. At some point in the relationship we just stopped caring. And forgot why and how we loved each other in the beginning.
I've read numerous articles and I've spend countless hours thinking how and why it happened. I came to this understanding that love is a chemical reaction in your brain. A man doesn't need to do something wrong or immoral, you know, something to feel guilty about, in order for a romantic relationship to fall apart. And when the chemical cocktail that is called love becomes imbalanced, one no longer feels the same towards a person that was one's entire life just a couple of days ago. It just wears out, that's all there is to it, I guess. Again, this is my opinion that I formed after what I believe was a thorough research.
What me and my wife did was get a divorce and keep our relationship extremely civil, based on mutual respect, with the focus being the absolute well being of our now 7 year old daughter.

On March 26 2017 20:11 dignitas.merz wrote:
Despite not actually cheating on my girlfriend I came as close as someone could ever come to cheating. And mentally for a split second I was going to give into the urge and just go through with it. That’s practically a point in which you cannot turn back from, even if you didn’t follow up on it.

I can also understand that. I never had sex with other women while I was married. It was when we talked that we will separate that I started to look for other women.
Even though I knew my ex had a relationship with another man while we were married. This passage in itself is such an interesting point of discussion for me that I'd love to talk it on and on for hours.
My point of view is that I am never actually jealous. For me the concept of jealousy just does not make any sense. I mean, it boils down to this: I am expected to torture myself with negative thoughts and feel miserable because a person that I love is having fun with someone else and is happy. How does this make sense? If I love this person, I'd want him/her to be happy in the way he/she feels like it. My emotions are not impacted by what the person does in the time he/she is not with me. All that matters is the time we actually spend together. If that time is not of high quality, then it's time to move on.
I must say I admire your level of dedication and openness towards the girl. Again, this is the respect I was talking about - to be able to formulate your emotions in a careful manner, not to offend the other person, be open and clean with yourself and that's all one can do. The rest is how the other one will perceive the situation.

The bodybuilding part is also fun, I also experienced that. I do bodybuilding and kickboxing and I watch my diet for some months now and the results are stunning. I am looking good and I am feeling good and it really does show in my attitude, yes. Girls seem to enjoy that confidence too, it's so easy to find a girl now that I don't feel like trying. I mean, it's certain I will get some chick when I go out so why do it? I'm better off reading something or doing some shadow boxing or watching some games or whatever.

Now, I am stunned that it's so hard to find a job as a lawyer there. In Bulgaria all the folk I know that are in the law sector, they find a high paying job just like that. High paying in Bulgaria is 1000+ EUR per month so take that with a grain of salt. But anyway, my point still stands.

And I must say I love your way with words, merz. I mean, it is to be expected from a law student to be eloquent but this was some high quality read. I am impressed. This comes after I've read all the novels of Remarque in the span of two months and that massively shifted my opinion on the quality of articles so, yeah, good job there.

All in all, I do believe things should work out for you. You're young, healthy, have sick good education, some law firm will have you at some time, this much is certain.

-Archangel-

Croatia7457 Posts

April 13 2017 09:31 GMT

#34

Normally I would agree with you, but first time people experience this it is shitty. Maybe not for everyone, but I think most people are not used to this and you forget how this is from time you did something similar in High School (but it was way more casual, fun and with less stuff to worry about).
And after a while some people get used to 8 to 5 (or 9 to 5) and some never do.

I remember my first such job (8 to 4) I worked on 5th floor of the building with a big window and big view and I would spend some time every day just looking out the window during sunny days wishing I was out there right now.

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