EPTBitch-slaps both physical and verbal seem to be required.
I mean how does she tolerate any of her employees to shit talk her and then still pay them?
How to help a person who refuses to be helped?...2 - Page 2
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B.I.G.
3251 Posts
Bitch-slaps both physical and verbal seem to be required. I mean how does she tolerate any of her employees to shit talk her and then still pay them? | ||
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NoSoldier
Germany84 Posts
I wish you the best of luck in the future.  | ||
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Djzapz
Canada10681 Posts
On December 12 2015 03:17 NoSoldier wrote: It appears you need me to spell it out for you. I can only yell at you what i reflect back from what you say, if you dont want to listen that is fine and dandy. I wish you the best of luck in the future. I specifically said I was not asking for advice for that reason. I can't give you an exhaustive explanation of the dynamics at play. That being said, thank you. On December 12 2015 02:34 B.I.G. wrote: Your mother's employees should respect her and your brother should respect her. Bitch-slaps both physical and verbal seem to be required. I mean how does she tolerate any of her employees to shit talk her and then still pay them? I agree. It's simple from my perspective because I would not tolerate it, but she to an extent depends on them. As much as the situation is intolerable, she needs them to keep her business afloat. And I've told her that she should raise hell when they disrespect her but she doesn't seem to be able to. Might seem weird that a business owner has trouble with discipline but she apparently hasnt needed it that much for over 30 years. But she recently fired a guy over it. | ||
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radscorpion9
Canada2252 Posts
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B-royal
Belgium1330 Posts
You can't stay sane in an increasingly toxic environment | ||
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MountainDewJunkie
United States10344 Posts
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zlefin
United States7689 Posts
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Djzapz
Canada10681 Posts
On December 12 2015 15:35 radscorpion9 wrote: wow I thought my life was bad. Seems like some people are living in hell every day, or it sounds like it. I really wish you luck, you seem like the only sane one there! Thank you. I'm sure they all have different versions of what happened, I'm not convinced that I'm particularly sane. To write a quick update: Due to how badly the situation blew up, I was under the impression that it was going to leave permanent "scars" so to speak on the family. Even thought that my mother was going to end her relationship with Dan, which would have been good and bad since I believe that he's "emotionally abusive". However, all seems to be back to normal. They get along now, and it looks like nothing of value was lost in her quick rampage. Seems like miraculously none of their work was broken beyond repair, and all deadlines were met. On December 13 2015 02:26 B-royal wrote: Let her "sell" the company and look for a job with less stress. Tell her to dedicate extra time to her mother (if she wants to) and to enjoy life some more. You can't stay sane in an increasingly toxic environment I wish she would sell it. Unfortunately there are very few people interested in buying this. They basically make the hardware for orthodontics, and those who have the skills generally start their own business, and the biggest asset of this business is its loyal customers, but building a base of customers/big clients is apparently relatively easy. Essentially this is a domain which has a fairly high barrier to entry, basically it's artisanal/technical work that needs to be done very well, but once you're there and you're willing to put in the work and you can do some networking, you're pretty much guaranteed to make a buck. Before in this thread I wrote about how hard it is to hire new employees, part of the reason is that some of them work for a few years and go on to start their own business. They even "steal" clients sometimes, even though there are some kind of deontological rules against it. On December 13 2015 04:40 MountainDewJunkie wrote: I edited my post to this: life is a kick in the pants. Take care your own business and do what you can, but know you can't compel people to do anything. Hopefully it gets better there. What I described before feels more like a ceasefire to me than peace... On December 13 2015 05:15 zlefin wrote: Having too many day to day stressors and problems tends to cause a decrease in effective long term planning. just putting it out there as a note to be mindful of. Yeah, and we're worried for her health too. =_= | ||
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MarlieChurphy
United States2063 Posts
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Djzapz
Canada10681 Posts
On December 13 2015 22:08 MarlieChurphy wrote: Set boundaries. Don't enable the behaviors. How do you suggest that I set boundaries for 3 adults that I don't live with? | ||
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MarlieChurphy
United States2063 Posts
On December 14 2015 04:55 Djzapz wrote: How do you suggest that I set boundaries for 3 adults that I don't live with? That doesn't mean physical boundaries https://duckduckgo.com/?q=boundaries in psychology | ||
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Djzapz
Canada10681 Posts
On December 14 2015 20:30 MarlieChurphy wrote: That doesn't mean physical boundaries https://duckduckgo.com/?q=boundaries in psychology I understand that, but how can I remotely enforce "psychological boundaries" from where I live? There's a limit to how much I can influence other people in changing their behavior, especially since much of it stems from powerful emotions. | ||
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hp.Shell
United States2527 Posts
Watch animals. Ducks are popular. You could even watch pigeons. Don't just look. Watch. Listen to the trees blowing in the wind. If you find help in this, invite your mom next time you go. | ||
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