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[Poetry] A Match Made In Heaven Set The Fires In Hell

Blogs > Soularion
Post a Reply
Soularion
Profile Blog Joined January 2014
Canada2764 Posts
March 08 2015 18:26 GMT
#1
Collection III (alternatively, Collection II)

A MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN
I. Rain Drops
I know it's, blocked out many a sun
Wise men daydream, maybe they would run
But when it's all said and done
Trust me, I'll be the one

Rain drops

Granite-flavored, lips they taste
Star-sprinkled eyes carry the haste
Maybe this man's been misplaced
Falling from the skies, out of this place

Rain drops

Utopia's distant
The dream's resistant
From cold streets to heart beats - easy to miss it
Fade, give in to the sickness

Rain drops

The dream clashes that lead to teeth gnashes
Streets laughing, same coating - rain drop splashes
Mama told us, never play with matches
I'd rather sit back and watch - ashes to ashes


II. Last Glance
The night sky will never die
The stars will stay there, they never lie
Til' they lie against a rain-soaked meadow
Fade out like echoes, lost every memo
No roses to casually adorn the grave
No memories, just last words to save
"Life never gave me a last chance"
You can tell a lot by a last glance


III. Lost
Drunk off the liquor that they poured for us
Dancing with knives, sometimes get deep cuts
Tossed us away, taught the sacred art of heartbreak
Only pleasure come from the time when its our wake

We ain't dead, we're just lost
This ain't the end, it's just frost

They lead us to chase cash
It's happiness, it'll lead you to a new day
But we found our own way
When we realized it wouldn't last

We ain't dead, we're just lost
This ain't the end, it's just frost

We walk this path alone
Trust, we've never known
Always looking for a legacy
Crown it with death, what it meant to me


IV. No Fairy Tales
These perfect moments
Tossed away for the next
Living on a blade's edge
Always aim for the necks

Snow white by the street light
Witching hour, settle in to midnight
Been told we wouldn't last long
Left calling dawn a black swan

Roses only adorn the coffin
Too busy chasing to find a calling
Truth is a bitch that'll have you biting nails
But truth is - there's no fairy tales


V. Interlude (Falling)
The shadows paint pictures from a shifting horizon
(Moments gone, moments gone)
Perfection in a second, how long will it last?
(Never long, never long)
The idea of a sun sets, but it's
(Always dawn, always dawn)
I'm falling, I'm falling
(Another pawn, another pawn)



SET THE FIRES IN HELL
VI. Michael
(They ain't listening
They ain't listening
They ain't listening)

Fires in the streets
Last dying breath of the heart beats
Been broken a few too many times
Eyes set, been through too many crimes
Hoping against hope, this just the first flame
Been told in burning bridges, there's no shame
Every wildfire was born from a first spark
So may this world burn 'til there's no dark

Still trapped in the cycles
Might just shoot for the michaels
No point, so far from salvation
Might as well shoot - for damnation

The flame's a prophet
Leads us to picking pockets
May order come from chaos
They gave us no payrolls, so we gave them no pathos
Sometimes hard to find sympathy
Amidst a siren's symphony
It all comes back to the lack of symmetry
Means these bad things, I always saw coming for me
But I'm..

Still trapped in the cycles
Might just shoot for the michaels
No point, so far from salvation
Might as well shoot - for damnation

(Bright blaze shines, a sun in the night
We all look down from the same worn height
But who's to say what's right?
I lost my way, it's a troubling sight)


VII. Ashes to Ashes
Fire in the streets
It all returns to the ashes
It all returns to the madness
Been sundered, but it always repeats
Gazed into the eye of the beast
Why give him a legacy when it always crashes
Why give him a tear when it always splashes
Gave this life the most, well it gave me the least

All this never changes
All this never changes

They said my blood was stainless
Maybe my death was painless
But when the ideas, they fade away
It's easy to tell the truth and say

We would never save the day
We would never save the day

But in the moment, it feels right
In the moment, it's like, we might
Find someway out of here
Never did, just disappear


IX. Little End
Don't burn your bridges
They're what keeps us from the waters
They're what keeps the men in the monsters
Emptiness is the greatest evil
Searching for something, leaving the peaceful
Found a fountain of youth
In the little lies we call truth
From the first inhale to the last breath
We're only equal in death
Amen


X. When It Falls Apart
There's no draws in gun fights
There's no stars in these nights
Leftovers of a false prophet supernova
Came to tell you - your time is over
No magnum opus, left with no hope
Hope leaves you aimless, a rifle with no scope
Easy to forget, there once was a spark
When it all falls apart


--


Feel free to post any thoughts/criticisms, but keep it constructive! I'm gonna keep making these (I keep saying the pace will slow down but apparently it doesn't) pretty much either way, so don't be afraid to share your opinion. Just share it in a positive way, preferably.

*
Writermaru pls
itsjustatank
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
Hong Kong9157 Posts
March 08 2015 18:31 GMT
#2
do you like ts eliot by any chance
Photographer"nosotros estamos backamos" - setsuko
Soularion
Profile Blog Joined January 2014
Canada2764 Posts
March 08 2015 18:35 GMT
#3
On March 09 2015 03:31 itsjustatank wrote:
do you like ts eliot by any chance


Despite being a poet (of sorts - I don't consider this traditional poetry, it's just the easiest label to adopt) myself, I actually have like no knowledge of regular poetry, so I suppose it's a maybe. I'll get into poetry-reading one day, though!
Writermaru pls
itsjustatank
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
Hong Kong9157 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-03-08 18:41:17
March 08 2015 18:40 GMT
#4
The Waste Land

what you have going reminds me of it
Photographer"nosotros estamos backamos" - setsuko
Carnivorous Sheep
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
Baa?21244 Posts
March 08 2015 21:30 GMT
#5
On March 09 2015 03:40 itsjustatank wrote:
The Waste Land

what you have going reminds me of it


That's incredibly insulting.
TranslatorBaa!
itsjustatank
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
Hong Kong9157 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-03-08 21:40:16
March 08 2015 21:38 GMT
#6
how so?

im not saying he stole it, or that he is unoriginal, it's just that I see the development of a style that is reminiscent of the above mentioned. since he says he hasn't been reading older poetry, i dont see how linking him to it is wrong.

good job making assumptions. i happen to like ts eliot a whole bunch, and I enjoyed what he put out in the OP.
Photographer"nosotros estamos backamos" - setsuko
Carnivorous Sheep
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
Baa?21244 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-03-08 21:43:31
March 08 2015 21:42 GMT
#7
It trivializes Eliot's work, especially considering how Eliot's work makes extensive use of the literary tradition through references, quotations, allusions, etc., whereas this is something that is quite different.

On March 09 2015 06:38 itsjustatank wrote:
how so?

im not saying he stole it, or that he is unoriginal, it's just that I see the development of a style that is reminiscent of the above mentioned. since he says he hasn't been reading older poetry, i dont see how linking him to it is wrong.

good job making assumptions. i happen to like ts eliot a whole bunch, and I enjoyed what he put out in the OP.


I neither said nor implied any of these things and you're the one making assumptions. How ironic. My issue was something completely different as you see.
TranslatorBaa!
itsjustatank
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
Hong Kong9157 Posts
March 08 2015 21:43 GMT
#8
oh im sorry he didnt have a fucking bibliography attached to his work. get off your high horse.
Photographer"nosotros estamos backamos" - setsuko
Carnivorous Sheep
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
Baa?21244 Posts
March 08 2015 21:44 GMT
#9
I like to think of it as a high sheep.
TranslatorBaa!
p4NDemik
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
United States13896 Posts
March 09 2015 17:09 GMT
#10
On "Rain Drops":

I like the idea of these short quatrains, almost separate poems being grouped together as different parts of a greater whole. I have an issue with the title though. If these quatrains are separate, but comprising more than just themselves, can't the title be something more illustrative and interesting than "Rain Drops"? There are small things about this piece I could poke at but this is the major artistic flaw that leaves me wanting something more creative right off the bat.

On "Last Glance"

I really like this one. After reading it aloud a few times I felt a connection. There's a gravity around it that is grounded in loss and that resonates with me. Really the only gripe that comes to my mind is the lack of punctuation. Punctuation helps me read your thoughts better, and with better rhythm.

On "Lost"

I didn't like it at all. I find I like poetry that has a well defined sense of self. Here you are writing for this "us." I don't know who "us" is and that means the poem is worthless to me. It feels like it could be about anybody. It feels like it could be written by anybody.

On "No Fairy Tales"

The last stanza is fucking BALLS ON. FUCK YEAH. As a whole though, the three stanzas didn't feel like they told a complete story. Personally, when I write a poem, I use a line break to separate different lines of thought, but I make sure that there is some logical flow from one stanza to the next. If I ask a question in a stanza, the next stanza makes sense by delving into that question. That way the stanzas have a relationship to each other without being the same line of thought. I can't feel those relationships in this poem.

On "Interlude (Falling)"

You write some great one-stanza poetry man. I feel like I can't fully enjoy this because I don't have another person with me to do the parts that are in parenthesis in a spooky, disembodied voice behind me. The only limitations in my enjoyment of this poem are on my side, not yours. Great stuff. Also, I love that you put this poem where you did in the collection because it gives me a chance to take an interlude of my own.

Most likely, I'll be back to read the rest of them. If I don't make it back though, keep this shit up. You're creating some quality poetry.
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