EPT________________________
So over the Christmas break I got some valuable real life work experience. One of my older cousins is a human resources manager (or something similar) for an accounting firm. Somehow he got me a position as a temporary sales assistant where all I had to do was run errands around the office and socialize with some people and ask them how their day was going. As it was around the holiday season, most employees were either super busy or super not focused at work. I actually spent a lot of time just browsing reddit because I had nothing better to do there anyway (most of the time).
Everything was going great until one morning literally the week before Christmas some people were discussing how the building I was at was trying to "coordinate operations" with the branch located in London. As a result we were going to have some people come in from England and who were going to talk about lots of boring stuff that I had no interest in.
What ended up happening was that two days later I go into the conference room where all the employees were invited and there were four people at the front of the room, three middle aged men and one attractive young woman (at least compared to the older dudes). I estimated her to be around 25 but then I soon learned when they were introducing themselves that she was 29. Anyway this was only a slight obstacle. At this company, on the first day that I had started coming here as a glorified janitor (without the actual cleaning), my cousin had introduced me to everyone and revealed my age. I realized this opportunity right here was too good to miss because she didn't know anything about me and so I could make up a completely different character for myself and I could even learn more about this woman and because I thought European accents were sexy.
As she was attractive, many older male employees and even males who were close to her age tried talking to her for a variety of stupid reasons, some work related and some I'm sure were not. I thought it would be very awkward to say the truth about being a high school senior and so I bluffed saying that I was a recent college grad who was 22 years old. It took me a lot of courage to even approach her. I decided the best way would be to say that I was getting coffee for everyone in the office and it would be cool to nonchalantly ask her if she wanted any. At first she politely declined but she did appear to smile in my direction or I may have been imagining things. I also overheard that these four foreigners were staying at a nearby Marriot for a few days.
On the second day I didn't see her very much as I assumed she and her other friends from England were working with the top people to get some stuff in line to improve efficiency or something like that. I had however noticed that she preferred to use a specific ladies room on the 3rd floor that was located in a remote corner of the building and so I tried to find a good hiding spot near that bathroom. Luckily there was a vending machine a few feet away that nobody ever seemed to use so I stayed there for about two hours waiting to see if she would stop by.
I was almost falling asleep when I heard someone approaching. I knew there was a woman walking towards me but I couldn't look or else she would see my face. So I quickly remembered what she looked like from the back. She had shoulder length dark brown hair and was skinny and about 5 feet 4 inches tall. As the woman opened the bathroom door, I shot a glance at whoever was entering and it seemed to match her description from the back. I waited outside the bathroom for about 2 minutes. I wanted to make it appear that I just happened to coincidentally be there for no apparent reason other than pure randomness.
Eventually she came out and I crossed paths with her finally. I tried to play it cool and hide my desperation to have a conversation. I was originally planning to ask a dozen different questions but I was so nervous that I could only ask how her day was going, how she liked the company, and if she would be okay to hang out after work. Her answers were predictable but I was surprised that she agreed to hang out together with me. I asked her if Starbucks was okay and she said it was and gave me her number. I knew that there was a Starbucks close to the building that a lot of employees visited so it would be tricky not to get noticed by someone who knew me, so I asked her if she was ok with going to the Starbucks near my house and made up the excuse that I was more familiar with the other Starbucks and that it would be more convenient for me if it was okay with her. She seemed confused at first but agreed anyway after smiling at me mysteriously. Before leaving something else she did which surprised me was when she said that her visa things were going good and she might get to stay in America and turn this into a long term project, but I couldn't tell if she was being serious or not from her tone.
Everything seemed to be going great. I even had my license and I drove my mom's old Honda to work so I definitely seemed mature enough. I arrived at the Starbucks at approximately 5:30pm and tried to find any signs of her. Unfortunately, I hadn't realized that this particular Starbucks was quite far from the Marriot hotel that she and her English friends were staying at. After about 30 minutes of having coffee by myself I knew she wasn't coming and was about to go home broken hearted when my cousin surprisingly walked in.
He waved at me and sat at my table. What he said next really made me bite my tongue. Apparently this woman named Alice who worked at the London branch and temporarily was at our building had filed a sexual harassment report against me for stalking her as she exited the restroom. She also clearly wanted me to know that she was engaged to her college boyfriend and my cousin seemed to emphasize the fact that she studied at Oxford, like it was supposed to change anything.
He advised me not to show up for "work" tomorrow (even though I barely did anything all day and it was literally 3 days before Christmas), but that he would provide a good reference for me in the future because "blood runs thicker than water".
edit: I dialed the number later that she gave me and found out it was a fake -_-.
