EPTBLOG TWO
August 19th, 2014
Alright so I pop up early in the morning and I don't have morning wood so I'm like, "fuck, am I getting old or did I just blow 10 loads in my sleep and my dick is tired?" so I check and there's nothing sticky until I realize my nose is running like crazy. Seems that I caught a cold sleeping on the 3rd floor with a giant fan blowing on me all night long. Things like physical ailments don't get me down unless I feel pissed off about it so I just wandered between the bathroom and the bedroom getting tissues every 3rd minute for the next hour and a half. Finally, my nose slowed down with all that hubbub and I took off to Dunkin' Donuts! The nearest cafe to where I am staying.. and its a half hour walk to get there.
The day was pretty awesome, I got to DD and ordered up my favorite morning beverage: coffee (black, no sugar) with a sack of weed. But the asshole governor of this state has blocked marijuana dispensaries with an executive power despite The Democratic Voting Base (lol only noobs vote) passing an initiative to legalize medical marijuana several years ago (idk if that is the correct timeframe). Alright so right now is just like yesterday, I am in a Dunkin' Donuts with a coffee. Its probably good that there's no weed because my brain can take this time to heal with all of the alcohol and caffeine that I am medicating it with on this vacation to see my old-ass great aunt.
So yesterday is the day I am blogging about, right? When the WiFi kicks in and I'm surfing the internet the thought occurs to me that it is time to start writing a blog. But I don't! It was all like, "Yo its time to write a poem" and my brain was like, "that's not a blog" and since I could not even. I. Derp. BTW I sat in that Dunkin' Donuts and transcribed my longhand notes during this trip into the google cloud so some fucking NSA already stole all of my secrets. I think that is why I am having trouble writing today.
Anyway I ditch the cafe and I head to the St. Mary's Church complex over on Pleasant Road. There was this huge line of 150+ people when I arrived at 9AM and bam, it was time to sling bread but only after myself and some other volunteers packed grocery bags full of potatoes. Then, it was great fun watching over my bread table insisting that people TAKE BREAD, but ONLY ONE DAMN IT!!!!!! This city is full of hispanics so there was a lot of them walking through the line along with dem blacks and asians. A handful of Russians came through (old as shit Russians) and damn Russians were cranky and their language sounds like gibberish.
Bam, I finished slinging bread and there wasn't shit to do so the Pastor is regaling a small circle of the elderly female volunteers with some jokes (the Pastor is a great jokester). Here's one: What do you call the cow who fails to produce milk? + Show Spoiler +
an utter failure
After that my elderly female cousins took us around to town so we could talk about all of their friends and family who have been dying off, which set up the atmosphere nicely as we visited some cemetaries. Finally, after hours and hours of deliberation, I decided to meet redditor autistic_psycho and that ruled.
Best Regards,
RG
