EPTToday I had an interview with the college which has the IT program. The college itself is at quite a remote location, which, although peaceful and beautiful, seems far away from civilization. I don't have a car, and I don't want to take a bus just to get to the closest food shop.
Anyways, the interview went quite well, but during that I realized something: I don't like writing. I can do it for my own enjoyment, but when it comes to school and writing, I get uncomfortable. I just don't feel like doing it.
So I guess my point is, I don't feel like going back to college. I dropped out once, but I don't feel like re-attending either. I just have this hunch that I wouldn't do too great of a job at studying. Growing lack of motivation is a problem too.
Some vocational schools are still taking applications, but I don't feel like attending those either. I can't really think of any good trades to learn.
Getting a job is what I'm strongly considering. I don't even care anymore what I would do, just anything to keep my mind occupied until conscription at spring. I want some money, just to feel more independent. I feel like this is currently my greatest weakness, and I don't think I will be able to obtain any form of further education, until I get a job.
I feel empty. There is no motivation to keep me moving forward. I want to travel and see the world, but I have idea how to do that. I want to be a musician, to make people happy.
I just want something, but what?
