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Active: 2311 users

yall seen blue valentine

Blogs > AiurZ
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AiurZ
Profile Blog Joined May 2004
United States429 Posts
August 16 2013 00:37 GMT
#1
i watched blue valentine earlier, last night

it made me instantly uncomfortable and i felt like i had to get away from it even from the very beginning, i increased the distance from which i was viewing the movie, then i had to pause the movie to do something else, then i increased the distance from which i was viewing the movie again, then i added an extra level of distraction to my viewing of the movie, i feel like these things werent really intentional or conscious but just like an underlying desire to get away from the movie

thats not really important

i was watching the movie and kept identifying with the character ryan gosling plays, i dont mean "identifying" in the way that i felt, "i feel like ryan goslings character" or anything similar to that, but like i felt that i was, as a viewer, more sympathetic towards ryan goslings character

this continued through the movie and i felt, originally, "ryan goslings character isnt really doing anything wrong" and thinking that he seems "sweet" etc., and found myself "assigning blame" and making value judgements towards the girl character.

at the end, i thought something like, "obviously this isnt all there is to the movie, the audience cant/shouldnt be expected to come away from this movie feeling in this specific way," so i started thinking about maybe the movie is playing with perceptions, so even though we have these sort of "third person" cuts that what we are really getting is generally one of the characters perception of the events but presented in this "objective" sort of way, which i felt would be difficult for a movie to convey effectively and i think too "structural" to have really been made into a movie

i started thinking something else about ryan goslings character, and i think started to feel more neutral towards both the characters in general, and, i think, even more sympathetic towards the girls character than i did ryan goslings character.

nobody i know has seen this movie so i cant ask them about how they felt watching it and how they felt towards the specific characters and their actions, so im not sure if my initial reaction is the reaction that most ppl have (or maybe the reaction that most "males" would have, maybe girls would have a different reaction [i think that this is too easy though, too easy of a sort of message, like "theres this vast gulf of understanding between men and women in relationships etc."]) or if its something like me actually strongly identifying with ryan goslings character and an initial resistance towards assigning blame on him or having a negative value judgement because of this



picture of dogs.jpg
MarlieChurphy
Profile Blog Joined January 2013
United States2065 Posts
August 16 2013 06:31 GMT
#2
Without any spoilers, can you describe the movie or whatever. I didn't read your post all the way, because I didn't wanna read spoilers
RIP SPOR 11/24/11 NEVAR FORGET
Kommatiazo
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United States579 Posts
August 16 2013 06:54 GMT
#3
On August 16 2013 15:31 MarlieChurphy wrote:
Without any spoilers, can you describe the movie or whatever. I didn't read your post all the way, because I didn't wanna read spoilers


It's essentially a story of living with the consequences of bad choices and what that means when there are other people involved.

It's honestly one of the most realistic "romances" I've ever seen. I highly recommend it, but with the caveat that you need to be ready for some heavy shit. Assumptions like "good guys always win" and "she always gets the right guy" don't apply here, just like real life. The OP talks about instantly feeling uncomfortable when watching it, and I wholeheartedly agree. But it's not a bad movie, it's fantastic to tell the truth, its just hard to watch and awfully real. Once was enough for me, but I am glad I watched it.
"You must enemy don't know, and very good micro" - Bosstoss #Wet4Ret
Kommatiazo
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United States579 Posts
August 16 2013 07:02 GMT
#4
On August 16 2013 09:37 AiurZ wrote:
i watched blue valentine earlier, last night

it made me instantly uncomfortable and i felt like i had to get away from it even from the very beginning, i increased the distance from which i was viewing the movie, then i had to pause the movie to do something else, then i increased the distance from which i was viewing the movie again, then i added an extra level of distraction to my viewing of the movie, i feel like these things werent really intentional or conscious but just like an underlying desire to get away from the movie

thats not really important

i was watching the movie and kept identifying with the character ryan gosling plays, i dont mean "identifying" in the way that i felt, "i feel like ryan goslings character" or anything similar to that, but like i felt that i was, as a viewer, more sympathetic towards ryan goslings character

this continued through the movie and i felt, originally, "ryan goslings character isnt really doing anything wrong" and thinking that he seems "sweet" etc., and found myself "assigning blame" and making value judgements towards the girl character.

at the end, i thought something like, "obviously this isnt all there is to the movie, the audience cant/shouldnt be expected to come away from this movie feeling in this specific way," so i started thinking about maybe the movie is playing with perceptions, so even though we have these sort of "third person" cuts that what we are really getting is generally one of the characters perception of the events but presented in this "objective" sort of way, which i felt would be difficult for a movie to convey effectively and i think too "structural" to have really been made into a movie

i started thinking something else about ryan goslings character, and i think started to feel more neutral towards both the characters in general, and, i think, even more sympathetic towards the girls character than i did ryan goslings character.

nobody i know has seen this movie so i cant ask them about how they felt watching it and how they felt towards the specific characters and their actions, so im not sure if my initial reaction is the reaction that most ppl have (or maybe the reaction that most "males" would have, maybe girls would have a different reaction [i think that this is too easy though, too easy of a sort of message, like "theres this vast gulf of understanding between men and women in relationships etc."]) or if its something like me actually strongly identifying with ryan goslings character and an initial resistance towards assigning blame on him or having a negative value judgement because of this




[SPOILERS]

I felt essentially the same way when watching it. In the end the only person I had any real pity towards was the child. My initial reaction was like yours, where I fought for Gosling, then shifted. But then I got cynical and started wishing everyone would just take a deep breath and do what they wanted instead of trying to fix everything and force reality into their delusional perception. Like Ryan Gosling's determination to save the marriage. At first that's exactly what I wanted to happen, but then I wanted the girl's character to just run away and leave Ryan Gosling behind. The hotel room scene was especially hard for me. When he gets angry at her for giving him what he wanted, but not HOW he wanted. Ughh, it's been years and it still makes me sad. In the end watching him walk away from the battle he'd been fighting all along, knowing that it was finally over, and these characters might be able to move on and recover made me happy, whereas that the start I would have been angry if they gave up. You can't win them all, I guess.

I watched Pride and Prejudice the next day to cleanse my pallet haha. I was in danger of extreme cynicism after watching Blue Valentine for sure. But Mr. Darcy set me straight.
"You must enemy don't know, and very good micro" - Bosstoss #Wet4Ret
Chairman Ray
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
United States11903 Posts
August 16 2013 07:10 GMT
#5
On August 16 2013 15:54 Kommatiazo wrote:
Show nested quote +
On August 16 2013 15:31 MarlieChurphy wrote:
Without any spoilers, can you describe the movie or whatever. I didn't read your post all the way, because I didn't wanna read spoilers


It's essentially a story of living with the consequences of bad choices and what that means when there are other people involved.

It's honestly one of the most realistic "romances" I've ever seen. I highly recommend it, but with the caveat that you need to be ready for some heavy shit. Assumptions like "good guys always win" and "she always gets the right guy" don't apply here, just like real life. The OP talks about instantly feeling uncomfortable when watching it, and I wholeheartedly agree. But it's not a bad movie, it's fantastic to tell the truth, its just hard to watch and awfully real. Once was enough for me, but I am glad I watched it.


That's an excellent description of the movie. I quite enjoyed the movie as well. It wasn't anything like a fairy tale romance. The characters were as imperfect as people in real life, and some parts of the movie were just heart wrenching, but I'm glad I watched it.
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