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[Metablog] Confessions of a 5 Star Bandit

Blogs > Bibbit
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Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
September 05 2012 21:14 GMT
#1
I’m a pretty big fan of the Blogs section here on TL. I read more of them than I can justify and am prone to using it myself to lob my stupid brilliant changes to Starcraft. But I have a deep, dark secret that I think I’m finally willing to share with y’all. There’s no real way to put this delicately so I’ll just come out and say it:

I often rate blogs 5 stars without even reading them.

I know, I know - it’s terrible and I’m very ashamed. But please just give me a moment to explain myself. It all started on my family’s farm in southern Portugal. Okay there’s no backstory, except where I got bitten by a radioactive Mormon. But that’s a different story.

To put it simply, if I see a blog that looks like there’s a lot of effort in it, I click the fifth star even if I’m not even a little bit interested and didn't actually read any of it. I just can’t stop myself! There are a lot of possible fixes I’ve brainstormed but none have worked out so far. I tried covering my mouse with hot sauce. I tried writing one-liner advertisements all over my monitor. I even went through months of psychotherapy trying to switch the meanings of the numbers 3 and 5 with each other in my mind! But no success.

I know I should stop myself here before getting in even deeper and risking being ostracized, but it gets even worse. There are some people who I 5 star even if they write something kind of dumb, like my son Dalguno and my grandpa Torte de Lini among many others. But of course, I saved the most awful, darkest secret for last: I have a strange addiction to Ladder Blogs.

This may come as a surprise to anyone who remembers this blog I wrote last year about why your ladder blog sucks and nobody reads it. It even became my first spotlighted thread ever out of only two (both spotlighted by Mani, come back!) even though it was one of the stupidest things I’ve ever written. But the reason it was so stupid was because it was a lie. I was lying to myself and even worse, I lied to all of you! I’m crazy for ladder blogs and I 5 star nearly all of them.

I couldn't tell you exactly why I like them so much. Something about silver leaguers talking about their games, talking about their 4 game win streaks, celebrating their newfound ability to play more than two games in a day, and even linking the replays just strikes me as absolutely adorable. I usually don't comment because I don't have much to say and I try to avoid one liners (no success guaranteed) but I just can't stop myself from leaving without clicking that five-star! I guess I'm just hoping that little bit of encouragement might cause them to continue making ladder blogs, all so I can continue to feed my sick fetish.

Maybe it's a lot to take in right now, but I really needed to get that off my chest. I will be checking into rehab ASAP and hopefully when I come back, everybody's blog rating will be just a bit lower. But I wouldn't count on it.

****
solidbebe
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
Netherlands4921 Posts
September 05 2012 21:16 GMT
#2
5/5

Lol I do exactly the same thing
That's the 2nd time in a week I've seen someone sig a quote from this GD and I have never witnessed a sig quote happen in my TL history ever before. -Najda
kollin
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
United Kingdom8380 Posts
September 05 2012 21:18 GMT
#3
Five star'd.

Probably a good read.
FlaShFTW
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States10569 Posts
September 05 2012 21:29 GMT
#4
tl:dr.

5/5 Heh.
Writer#1 KT and FlaSh Fanboy || Woo Jung Ho Never Forget || Teamliquid Political Decision Desk
TL+ Member
Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
September 05 2012 21:30 GMT
#5
Thanks for the support guys, it's nice to know I'm not alone! Should make the rehab process easier, I think.
MysteryMeat1
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
United States3292 Posts
September 05 2012 21:35 GMT
#6
alas im a five star bandit to
"Cause ya know, Style before victory." -The greatest mafia player alive
Stratos
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Czech Republic6104 Posts
September 05 2012 21:47 GMT
#7
Bibbit, entertaining and humble as usual. Instead of 5 staring random blogs, give us more of your own imo
En Taro Violet
Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
September 05 2012 21:53 GMT
#8
On September 06 2012 06:47 Stratos wrote:
Bibbit, entertaining and humble as usual. Instead of 5 staring random blogs, give us more of your own imo

Aw, too kind! I did do two BW battle reports and stupid Sc2 joke in the last few weeks if you missed them. plugplugplug

+ Show Spoiler [shame] +
http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?id=363516
http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?id=363916
http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?id=366188
Stratos
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Czech Republic6104 Posts
September 05 2012 21:54 GMT
#9
On September 06 2012 06:53 Bibbit wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 06 2012 06:47 Stratos wrote:
Bibbit, entertaining and humble as usual. Instead of 5 staring random blogs, give us more of your own imo

Aw, too kind! I did do two BW battle reports and stupid Sc2 joke in the last few weeks if you missed them. plugplugplug

+ Show Spoiler [shame] +
http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?id=363516
http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?id=363916
http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?id=366188

ofc I didn't
En Taro Violet
Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-09-05 22:10:27
September 05 2012 22:08 GMT
#10
On September 06 2012 06:54 Stratos wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 06 2012 06:53 Bibbit wrote:
On September 06 2012 06:47 Stratos wrote:
Bibbit, entertaining and humble as usual. Instead of 5 staring random blogs, give us more of your own imo

Aw, too kind! I did do two BW battle reports and stupid Sc2 joke in the last few weeks if you missed them. plugplugplug

+ Show Spoiler [shame] +
http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?id=363516
http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?id=363916
http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?id=366188

ofc I didn't

Oh sick. I have, like, a fan. Or something. I feel like a celebrity if celebrities only made stupid comments on a video game forum!

edit: dammit, I just looked at your blogs and they're like the exact kinds of things I can't stop myself from 5 starring. T_T
Qwyn
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States2781 Posts
September 05 2012 22:15 GMT
#11
For a second there, I thought you were confessing to be the 1 star bandit who ninjas Blazinghand's blogs, lol.
"Think of the hysteria following the realization that they consciously consume babies and raise the dead people from their graves" - N0
Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
September 05 2012 22:17 GMT
#12
On September 06 2012 07:15 Qwyn wrote:
For a second there, I thought you were confessing to be the 1 star bandit who ninjas Blazinghand's blogs, lol.

Haha thats actually why I wrote this. :D I mean, I had the idea a few days ago but seeing that ninja in Blazinghand's blog is what made me sit down and actually write it.

+ Show Spoiler +
I 5 starred that blog btw
UniversalSnip
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
9871 Posts
September 05 2012 22:35 GMT
#13
i share your love of ladder blogs... I must confess, also, that blogs that are in-jokey (anything featuring the cast of tl) or are long, driveling examinations of incidents with a focus on the author's worldview get an automatic 1 star after no more than the lightest possible skim, and sometimes not even that.
"How fucking dare you defile the sanctity of DotA with your fucking casual plebian terminology? May the curse of Gaben and Volvo be upon you. le filthy casual."
Torte de Lini
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Germany38463 Posts
September 05 2012 22:55 GMT
#14
How the fuck do you like ladder blogs that are about 1/2 paragraph about nothing but what I could get in a conversaiton with anyone active in the ladder.

You're a hero for reading htese!
https://twitter.com/#!/TorteDeLini (@TorteDeLini)
Kanil
Profile Joined April 2010
United States1713 Posts
September 05 2012 23:07 GMT
#15
So if I start a ladder blog to work my way up the blog ladder, you'll come and 5 star it?

Even though I'm an awful player, I could still be a high master blogger just on pity alone?
I used to have an Oz icon over here ---->
Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
September 05 2012 23:13 GMT
#16
On September 06 2012 08:07 Kanil wrote:
So if I start a ladder blog to work my way up the blog ladder, you'll come and 5 star it?

Even though I'm an awful player, I could still be a high master blogger just on pity alone?

Idk, if its just me doing it, probably not! I think even if you have an average 5 star rating, if its based on like 6 votes over 6 blogs, it might not work!

But you should try. Mmmmmm.
vOdToasT
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Sweden2870 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-09-06 00:28:03
September 06 2012 00:27 GMT
#17
Haha. Well written. I laughed, and rated it 5/5.
If it's stupid but it works, then it's not stupid* (*Or: You are stupid for losing to it, and gotta git gud)
Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
September 06 2012 03:03 GMT
#18
I think I'm already starting to get better. I just totally found a blog that I was able to one star the shit out of!!!
Funnytoss
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
Taiwan1471 Posts
September 06 2012 03:32 GMT
#19
I give out 5 stars fairly liberally too. I don't really recall giving any 1 stars - it's just bad karma. Reminds me of how hard it is to get your GPA back up after a bad first semester. I had a blog that got several 1-stars almost immediately after posting for the lolz, and that was somewhat annoying.
AIV_Funnytoss and sGs.Funnytoss on iCCup
ChristianS
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
United States3304 Posts
September 06 2012 04:37 GMT
#20
I have the same problem, but only with Bibbit blogs. I just can't stop myself from 5-starring them.
"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." -Robert J. Hanlon
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