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I'm 15 years old and find myself caught in a rather perplexing dilemma. I'am offered the choice to move to Australia with my Uncle, Aunt, and 3 cousins to study in Brisbane. My father and mother will be left in Singapore should I choose to go. I'am on good terms with those relatives, one thing that should be noted.
I'am not doing exceptionally well in Singapore and I find the education system here to be extremely rigid and I do not like how thing are done here compared to a 'Western' education system. However, research have shown that an 'Asian' education system tends to produce more academically capable student. Then again, if I move to Brisbane, I would be able to drop my Mother Tongue (I always fail it) and lead a more sporty lifestyle because of the multitude of sport programmes and such.
In Singapore, I don't have many friends and I feel ostracised from almost everybody. My best, and perhaps only true friend recently moved back to South Korea because his family experienced some economic difficulties =( I also have a rather "off" sense of humour that is not in anyway similar to my classmates here. The things I find funny they might find ridiculous and stupid, and as a result, my happiness which comes from the humour that I find so funny is always met with vindication and jest. I don't feel like talking about all my other friend problems and how incompatible I'am with my schoolmates, so I'll leave this part at this.
Now, I don't have a very close relationship with my mother. My mother spends more time interacting, communicating, and being nice to her least-close-friend than with me. On my birthday this year she declined to celebrate at a restaurant with my Dad and I as she wanted to spend the time with her friend instead. This is not a case of "hard-parenting", I assure you. It's a case of no parenting at all. She doesn't even treat me as her own child. Whenever she calls she doesn't even say "Hello", or "Bye". Our communication is only limited to her barking at me to turn on the TV or fetch her handphone for her because she is too lazy to do it herself. I think it is safe to say that if I were to move, I wouldn't miss her. She treats me like I was an accident.
My Dad, I love him a lot. Whatever love that didn't go to my mom went to my Dad. However, he gets really caught up with using the computer that he sometimes just ignores me or simply grunts whenever I try to ask him anything. I think I have to mention that he is actually quite successful. He had a choice to retire at the age of 46 (Doctor), but he decided to pair up with some Charity organisation from Taiwan to start his own free-clinic so he can help the community. Still earns quite a good bit of money.
In summary, I guess what I would like to get from TL is some feedback about Singaporean vs Western education. It would be useful if links could be posted on some articles about this. Also, maybe some info about a Western education because I'm not very well acquainted with it.
 
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Sounds like you're convincing yourself to leave pal.
Ultimately it's your choice, you need to decide this for yourself.
No one on TL can offer you true advice on this seeing as we don't personally know you.
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While on average your education system you are in currently may produce better students, you need to remember:
No matter where you are, you education is completely up to you, and no one else. You could be in the best system in the world, or have the best personal tutors, but if you don't want to learn, you won't. You could have no teachers at all, and if you care enough, be able to teach yourself through two wonderful resources-- the internetz and books.
If you work hard in Brisbane, you will still be academically successful. If you stay in Singapore and don't give a fuck, you could very well do very poorly. It's all up to you.
Anyway, it's a big decision. Sounds like you are learning towards moving, but good luck deciding!
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Fuck educational systems and family. Go have an adventure in Aussie land! You can always return to your home but you can never leave for australia again with the same purpose.
My biggest regret growing up was that I never took a year studying in another country... I'm 25 now so I've had time to think it over...
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I'd say go for it.
From what I'm seeing, your dad is the only real reason that's keeping you back. I assure you all parents want better for their children(maybe apart from your mother but cases like these are really rare and unfortunate) and your dad will understand if you say you want to move to Brisbane. Plus Australia isn't all that far from Singapore either so you can always go back to visit him once/twice a year when you're on holiday. On a daily basis you'd still be able to call and talk to him w/o the time zone differences like some overseas students like me have.
Now, look at what you'd get if you decided to move. You'll get a brand new start, where you won't have to feel the heavy atmosphere you might have had staying at home with your mom. You'll be able to make new friends cuz people are simply that much nicer to foreigners, especially the Aussies. Your study load will be a lot lighter as well< I myself have spent 3 years studying in Singapore in Secondary school and JC, was not impressed>. It's basically a new life, and I believe it'll be much less ' suffocating ' than the one you're having in Singapore.
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Hmm, I guess I'm leaning towards moving. But how do I go about trying to convey this message? My dad thinks that I'am simply being lazy here but how do I say that that I do not fit into the system here and would fit better in Australia? Do I just say that the reason why I display no interest in academics is because I don't like the system?
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kill her, cover her body in lime, dig a hole, and it will be gone in a week.
have your best friend say you were at his house the whole night.
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On February 20 2012 21:30 Nizzy wrote:
kill her, cover her body in lime, dig a hole, and it will be gone in a week.
have your best friend say you were at his house the whole night.
What.
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On February 20 2012 21:30 Nizzy wrote:
kill her, cover her body in lime, dig a hole, and it will be gone in a week.
have your best friend say you were at his house the whole night.
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You will never know if you never go.
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On February 20 2012 21:18 NoctemSC wrote:
Sounds like you're convincing yourself to leave pal.
Ultimately it's your choice, you need to decide this for yourself.
No one on TL can offer you true advice on this seeing as we don't personally know you.
^ This!
However from how you explain the situation i would say GO!
You are not happy where you are and you don't have a good realtionship with your mom and not even with your dad. A change of scenery sounds exaclty like the thing you want.
You can at least try it, if you don't like there is always a chance of going back. And i mean really try it for a long time and try to build a life there.
Yes you will miss your family at least somewhat probably, but stuff like that happens, important thing us you will hopefully be better off. There is skype and kinds of shit you kow hehe. Seems like your uncle, aunt and cousins are good people, maybe they will race/treat you better. Also your 15 so you are still young 
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On February 20 2012 21:29 Azera wrote:
Hmm, I guess I'm leaning towards moving. But how do I go about trying to convey this message? My dad thinks that I'am simply being lazy here but how do I say that that I do not fit into the system here and would fit better in Australia? Do I just say that the reason why I display no interest in academics is because I don't like the system?
Show him this blog.
(But on the other hand, now it's tainted by that shit commentary under yours)
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I've suffered through our education system and I'm about to enter the shittiest phase of all.
I have always sort of snarked at friends/acquaintances who went overseas/international schools to study because to me, they were "taking the easy way out".
However, upon further reflection, this attitude of mine could perhaps stem from a deep rooted jealousy. Why did I have to go through shit and he go through heaven, and have both of us end up at the same destination? I have the option to further my studies overseas. However, I still chose to have my university education right here. Why? I simply don't want someone like my past self to think that I've taken the easy way out. If others can do it, so can I.
I may be sounding harsh here, but as a 'friend' of yours on TL (I've spoken to you on a couple of occasions through PM and whatnot), I say do it if you really want to. However, as a Singaporean, and as my past self, I would say-- suck it up dude. You are what you make yourself to be. Make the effort to fit in. Make the effort to reach out to your mother. Make the effort to work hard and excel.
Disclaimer: Do not read on if you do not want to hear harsh words.
I've read your previous blogs, but have said nothing. To be bluntly honest, what I've inferred from your threads is that you're unable to take hardship. Maybe your classmates and acquaintances don't give a shit about their studies, but the rest of us, like myself, have taken this route and survived. We have learnt to work with assholes as teammates, assholes as teachers and also simply being an asshole to yourself (lack of motivation, etc).
You know where I'm from (right?), and you know what I'm going to study in future (I think so!). Therefore you would also know that I've gone through whatever you have, and more. No one on the path of success has had it easy (save for Justin Bieber and the like), and no one ever will.
Going overseas would be the easy way out. You're going to do well there, get an easy degree (to all the detractors-- shut up, it's true, there is no denying this fact). Whereas if you stay here, you learn to be a stronger person. A person that would survive in the our local workforce, a person that would survive in the dog-eat-dog society that we have been encultured to live in.
Friend, there is no more time to wallow in self-pity. Stop trying to find a way out. Perhaps it is not people who ostracize you, but vice versa (I know exactly what you mean, and I know exactly what I'm saying, because I've been there)?
Good luck dude.
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On February 20 2012 21:49 blubbdavid wrote:Show nested quote +On February 20 2012 21:29 Azera wrote:
Hmm, I guess I'm leaning towards moving. But how do I go about trying to convey this message? My dad thinks that I'am simply being lazy here but how do I say that that I do not fit into the system here and would fit better in Australia? Do I just say that the reason why I display no interest in academics is because I don't like the system? Show him this blog. (But on the other hand, now it's tainted by that shit commentary under yours)
Nah, I won't show him this blog.
Sigh, it's upsetting to know that nobody knows me well enough to give me advice IRL
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Hey, i used to live in singapore too for 6 years. Moved out of the country around the age of 10/11 and eventually to New Zealand. The main reason for this was because my parents thought that i'd have a more stressfree education here. Even though i havent experienced the study lifestyle there as much as you have, i still remember waking up at 6am to catch the bus and getting hit by the teachers a couple of times (ears pulled, and caned on the hands). Always dozed off during chinese classes cause i was so tired and the teacher would poke my head with a stick lol. Not surprisingly i always failed mandarin D:
I would say that the education system is definetly more relaxing in the western countries especially New Zealand. I dont know much about the australian system but it cant be too different. Im currently on my 4th year at the university of auckland. Being accepted into well known universities is definetly easier to do in nz and australia compared to countries like south korea and probably singapore. Teachers arent as strict usually but theres always one or two exceptions. I dont think the materials you learn are any easier but there is almost no pressure at all to do exceptionally well just so you can get by. The workload is also relatively small right up until you graduate to uni.
For me i definetly enjoyed the western education system more but it also has its flaws. It's harder to get motivated to do well and sometimes theres no point in even getting good marks. I did make much more friends here but i was also lucky enough to meet some great guys. Im probably making it sound like western education system is the easiest thing in the world (which its not) but its really not as competitive as a lot of asian systems. Also ncea is a pretty bad education system (this one school gave credits for picking up rubbish lol) and im pretty sure australia uses a different one.
II think though you do lose a bit of your sense of nationality a little (ive moved around a fair number of countries and even though im korean by birthright, it never feels that way).
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On February 20 2012 21:55 theBALLS wrote:
I've suffered through our education system and I'm about to enter the shittiest phase of all.
I have always sort of snarked at friends/acquaintances who went overseas/international schools to study because to me, they were "taking the easy way out".
However, upon further reflection, this attitude of mine could perhaps stem from a deep rooted jealousy. Why did I have to go through shit and he go through heaven, and have both of us end up at the same destination? I have the option to further my studies overseas. However, I still chose to have my university education right here. Why? I simply don't want someone like my past self to think that I've taken the easy way out. If others can do it, so can I.
I may be sounding harsh here, but as a 'friend' of yours on TL (I've spoken to you on a couple of occasions through PM and whatnot), I say do it if you really want to. However, as a Singaporean, and as my past self, I would say-- suck it up dude. You are what you make yourself to be. Make the effort to fit in. Make the effort to reach out to your mother. Make the effort to work hard and excel.
Disclaimer: Do not read on if you do not want to hear harsh words.
I've read your previous blogs, but have said nothing. To be bluntly honest, what I've inferred from your threads is that you're unable to take hardship. Maybe your classmates and acquaintances don't give a shit about their studies, but the rest of us, like myself, have taken this route and survived. We have learnt to work with assholes as teammates, assholes as teachers and also simply being an asshole to yourself (lack of motivation, etc).
You know where I'm from (right?), and you know what I'm going to study in future (I think so!). Therefore you would also know that I've gone through whatever you have, and more. No one on the path of success has had it easy (save for Justin Bieber and the like), and no one ever will.
Going overseas would be the easy way out. You're going to do well there, get an easy degree (to all the detractors-- shut up, it's true, there is no denying this fact). Whereas if you stay here, you learn to be a stronger person. A person that would survive in the our local workforce, a person that would survive in the dog-eat-dog society that we have been encultured to live in.
Friend, there is no more time to wallow in self-pity. Stop trying to find a way out. Perhaps it is not people who ostracize you, but vice versa (I know exactly what you mean, and I know exactly what I'm saying, because I've been there)?
Good luck dude.
Hey, friend :D
I guess this can be perceived as me taking the easy way out, but why can't I? What are the major benefits of having a Singaporean education? Surely if I put it effort in Australia, which I think would be much easier because of the more relaxed environment and whatnot, I can be as good or even better if I performed well in Singapore?
Not to stray off topic, but my hero Neil deGrasse Tyson, director of the Hayden Planetarium studied in the Bronx man, from what I know the Bronx isn't a good place to be.
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On February 20 2012 22:14 kjaek wrote:
Hey, i used to live in singapore too for 6 years. Moved out of the country around the age of 10/11 and eventually to New Zealand. The main reason for this was because my parents thought that i'd have a more stressfree education here. Even though i havent experienced the study lifestyle there as much as you have, i still remember waking up at 6am to catch the bus and getting hit by the teachers a couple of times (ears pulled, and caned on the hands). Always dozed off during chinese classes cause i was so tired and the teacher would poke my head with a stick lol. Not surprisingly i always failed mandarin D:
I would say that the education system is definetly more relaxing in the western countries especially New Zealand. I dont know much about the australian system but it cant be too different. Im currently on my 4th year at the university of auckland. Being accepted into well known universities is definetly easier to do in nz and australia compared to countries like south korea and probably singapore. Teachers arent as strict usually but theres always one or two exceptions. I dont think the materials you learn are any easier but there is almost no pressure at all to do exceptionally well just so you can get by. The workload is also relatively small right up until you graduate to uni.
For me i definetly enjoyed the western education system more but it also has its flaws. It's harder to get motivated to do well and sometimes theres no point in even getting good marks. I did make much more friends here but i was also lucky enough to meet some great guys. Im probably making it sound like western education system is the easiest thing in the world (which its not) but its really not as competitive as a lot of asian systems. Also ncea is a pretty bad education system (this one school gave credits for picking up rubbish lol) and im pretty sure australia uses a different one.
Oh yeah! Thanks for your reply and bringing up a great point!
I heard Universities like Harvard, Oxford, and the like have a certain number of students that the accept from a certain country/region. Like 50 from Singapore (Which would be impossible to get in, because well, it's obvious), and maybe 170 from Australia, which would perhaps be easier to get in to?
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On February 20 2012 22:21 Azera wrote:Show nested quote +On February 20 2012 22:14 kjaek wrote:
Hey, i used to live in singapore too for 6 years. Moved out of the country around the age of 10/11 and eventually to New Zealand. The main reason for this was because my parents thought that i'd have a more stressfree education here. Even though i havent experienced the study lifestyle there as much as you have, i still remember waking up at 6am to catch the bus and getting hit by the teachers a couple of times (ears pulled, and caned on the hands). Always dozed off during chinese classes cause i was so tired and the teacher would poke my head with a stick lol. Not surprisingly i always failed mandarin D:
I would say that the education system is definetly more relaxing in the western countries especially New Zealand. I dont know much about the australian system but it cant be too different. Im currently on my 4th year at the university of auckland. Being accepted into well known universities is definetly easier to do in nz and australia compared to countries like south korea and probably singapore. Teachers arent as strict usually but theres always one or two exceptions. I dont think the materials you learn are any easier but there is almost no pressure at all to do exceptionally well just so you can get by. The workload is also relatively small right up until you graduate to uni.
For me i definetly enjoyed the western education system more but it also has its flaws. It's harder to get motivated to do well and sometimes theres no point in even getting good marks. I did make much more friends here but i was also lucky enough to meet some great guys. Im probably making it sound like western education system is the easiest thing in the world (which its not) but its really not as competitive as a lot of asian systems. Also ncea is a pretty bad education system (this one school gave credits for picking up rubbish lol) and im pretty sure australia uses a different one.
Oh yeah! Thanks for your reply and bringing up a great point! I heard Universities like Harvard, Oxford, and the like have a certain number of students that the accept from a certain country/region. Like 50 from Singapore (Which would be impossible to get in, because well, it's obvious), and maybe 170 from Australia, which would perhaps be easier to get in to?
I wouldnt know too much about it. If you want to keep your options wide and perhaps move to other countries to work, well known australian universities like sydney / melbourne are also pretty prestigious. Just because they are easier to get into doesnt mean that you will learn less / be less skilled. As long as you get good grades and you yourself aim to become skilled in what you do, you should be fine.
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On February 20 2012 21:25 RedJustice wrote:
While on average your education system you are in currently may produce better students, you need to remember:
No matter where you are, you education is completely up to you, and no one else. You could be in the best system in the world, or have the best personal tutors, but if you don't want to learn, you won't. You could have no teachers at all, and if you care enough, be able to teach yourself through two wonderful resources-- the internetz and books.
If you work hard in Brisbane, you will still be academically successful. If you stay in Singapore and don't give a fuck, you could very well do very poorly. It's all up to you.
Anyway, it's a big decision. Sounds like you are learning towards moving, but good luck deciding!
+1 this. Its really all up to you. If you feel like it, having a more relaxed environment might enable you to learn better. However it really is harder to do well (lack of motivation plays a big part) and i'd say that i would probably have done much better in my studies had i stayed in singapore. Who knows though, maybe the pressure would have made me do worse. I personally dont regret moving to new zealand ( although it wasnt me making the decision and i was much younger so the transition would be smoother).
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EPT
