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On October 01 2011 02:06 Azera wrote:
What would happen if I showed the girl what I wrote?
If you want to get her, which I presume you do, don't show her the writing. She'll think its weird and probably think that you're a bit of a creep. In my experience most girls don't like it when a guy spends ages thinking and planning and basically procrastinating. I'll give you the example that made me truly realise this. So the first couple of times I went to clubs or music nights, just places where you can dance I'd dance around the girls I liked, hoping that they'd start dancing with me, and I'm pretty sure, at least from speaking with other friends, that this is what most guys do, especially when they're still quite shy around girls. Most of the time I was unsuccessful and then you start wondering what makes you so unappealing to girls.
So one night I got super drunk, and with super drunkenness comes super Dutch courage, and just went up to girls and started dancing with them (it sounds creepy when I say it like this, but really its not like I'd keep trying if they didn't want it) and it actually worked.
Basically this is just a long winded way of saying, just go for it if you want her. Sure you might get rejected and that'll be temporarily embarrassing, but I'd say you're less likely to get rejected sooner rather than later, and its better to get rejected straight out than spend 5 months brooding, only to get rejected then. I think this is a lesson that guys really need to learn form their own experience, but you can at least be pushed in the right direction.
On October 01 2011 02:17 Azera wrote:
Well then , I guess Ill just talk to her. If we get together I can show her right? Or is that too creepy?
Its too creepy. I've heard stories of guys who actually got with girls, who then found out that they'd been writing about their feelings and it just scared the girl off.
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Calgary26004 Posts
On October 01 2011 02:17 Azera wrote:
Well then , I guess Ill just talk to her. If we get together I can show her right? Or is that too creepy?
When I'm giving myself relationship advice, I often think of advice I would give my friend.
Your friend is infatuated with a girl. Through a stroke of luck, he manages to get her on a few dates. Then he asks for your advice. Do you advise him to:
1) Be cool.
2) Show her all the borderline creepy writing he's got about stalking her for weeks (months?)
Come on.
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I guess i just gotta skate then.
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On October 01 2011 02:17 Azera wrote:
Well then , I guess Ill just talk to her. If we get together I can show her right? Or is that too creepy?
Go for it you can do this!
just start with a casual line or a random funny quote to break the ice, I'm pretty sure it will flow smoothly if you always be yourself, don't try to act epic cool cause that'll just ruin it and that's not who you are, trust me been tru this millions of time with a load of girls,and nothing works better than being your truself always and keeping your head cool and casual
GL!
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Rating this a 5 stars based on the writing quality.
Just talk to the girl you know...like a normal person? =)
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I'm going to copy and paste what I put in your last thread:
On September 28 2011 02:34 Servius_Fulvius wrote:Show nested quote +On September 28 2011 01:37 Azera wrote:
Ok, I understand what you're trying to say, but how do I start talking to her? Do I just walk up to her and say "Heh, strange how we always see each other." (This is true, for not only do I see her when I go to school, I see her at a street near my school daily and on the bus home as well.) That's one way. "Hi! I see you on the bus every day, but then noticed you on a street near my school. Do you have friends in the area?". It's important to ask a question that warrants participation. The question I posed isn't that great either because it's a yes or no question that she could answer with a yes or no. A simple transition is "Sorry if that sounds a little creepy. I'm Azera, I go to school the school nearby. What's your name?". Go from there. Great questions to ask are "Where are you from", "Where do you go to school", "How is school going", "How do you spend your free time"....stuff like that. Personally I think it's a lot easier to meet people through social groups since the ice is so much easier to break, but when it comes to talking to someone you've never really met this is the way to go.
Is it terrifying? Yes! Is it going to happen if you don't speak up first? No!
You had it going with the "earphones are annoying" bit - it would have been a decent ice breaker. So would "Hey, what were you just listening to?"...actually that works too because then you can go into a conversation about music (great choice with Vanessa Mae, btw. She rocks!).
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"Earphones are pretty annoying aren't they?" with a smile= victory. WHY YOU NO DO THAT!?
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On October 01 2011 09:21 RezChi wrote:
"Earphones are pretty annoying aren't they?" with a smile= victory. WHY YOU NO DO THAT!?
I don't know... nerves/lack of self-esteem
Wait I just thought of something. What do I do if she has earphones in?
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On October 01 2011 11:24 Azera wrote:Show nested quote +On October 01 2011 09:21 RezChi wrote:
"Earphones are pretty annoying aren't they?" with a smile= victory. WHY YOU NO DO THAT!? I don't know... nerves/lack of self-esteem Wait I just thought of something. What do I do if she has earphones in?
*tap shoulder* "Excuse me, i just can't get over the fact of how beautiful you are. I know i may sound like a creeper but I'd just like to be the first one to tell you that." *smile and look back forward* if she replies talk to her = D
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On October 01 2011 11:53 RezChi wrote:Show nested quote +On October 01 2011 11:24 Azera wrote:On October 01 2011 09:21 RezChi wrote:
"Earphones are pretty annoying aren't they?" with a smile= victory. WHY YOU NO DO THAT!? I don't know... nerves/lack of self-esteem Wait I just thought of something. What do I do if she has earphones in? *tap shoulder* "Excuse me, i just can't get over the fact of how beautiful you are. I know i may sound like a creeper but I'd just like to be the first one to tell you that." *smile and look back forward* if she replies talk to her = D
...What?!
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konadora
Singapore66365 Posts
you should write :<
and you should have talked ;___;
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On October 01 2011 11:54 Azera wrote:Show nested quote +On October 01 2011 11:53 RezChi wrote:On October 01 2011 11:24 Azera wrote:On October 01 2011 09:21 RezChi wrote:
"Earphones are pretty annoying aren't they?" with a smile= victory. WHY YOU NO DO THAT!? I don't know... nerves/lack of self-esteem Wait I just thought of something. What do I do if she has earphones in? *tap shoulder* "Excuse me, i just can't get over the fact of how beautiful you are. I know i may sound like a creeper but I'd just like to be the first one to tell you that." *smile and look back forward* if she replies talk to her = D ...What?!
Meh don't say "i know i may sound like a creeper"
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On October 01 2011 12:23 Livelovedie wrote:Show nested quote +On October 01 2011 11:54 Azera wrote:On October 01 2011 11:53 RezChi wrote:On October 01 2011 11:24 Azera wrote:On October 01 2011 09:21 RezChi wrote:
"Earphones are pretty annoying aren't they?" with a smile= victory. WHY YOU NO DO THAT!? I don't know... nerves/lack of self-esteem Wait I just thought of something. What do I do if she has earphones in? *tap shoulder* "Excuse me, i just can't get over the fact of how beautiful you are. I know i may sound like a creeper but I'd just like to be the first one to tell you that." *smile and look back forward* if she replies talk to her = D ...What?! Meh don't say "i know i may sound like a creeper"
Yeah take out the creeper part then your fine.
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Calgary26004 Posts
On October 01 2011 12:19 konadora wrote:
you should write :<
and you should have talked ;___;
This is offensive. When you give advice, ask yourself if you're in the position to give advice please.
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Perfect opening line around here for a girl you completely do not know is
"Hi, sorry, but you're just too/so/etc cute that I couldn't let you keep walking by without talking to you/getting your number/etc" If the girl is into you they wont mind this approach at all, if they aren't you'll find out immediately, it's very efficient.
And you only show a girl stuff you write about her once you're like rather close on some level.
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The words for writing aren't often the same that should be used for talking. It's tough at any age to muster enough courage to speak publicly, but you're probably showing enough maturity if you do so. Girls are generally more mature than boys around that age, show that you can hold your weight. How you handle the rejection afterwards can go a long way. So just be try hard to not try hard.
Long way of saying: Be cool
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i would take you on as my personal protege but there's already this 14 year old singaporian street fighter warrior who's my skype buddy and training partner
anyway, nobody has brought this up yet - the reason you can't show her your writing is because you invest so deeply into her but you haven't even talked to her yet. in her eyes you could be writing this about any girl if she were pretty enough. and that's exactly what you're doing, so don't act like you aren't shallow and "not like the other boys". you're exactly like the other boys, just "smart" enough to try to rationalize your intent
the line suggested above about "you're cute ...etc." works, but consider it a high level build order. however, if you actually do try it i think your % of success is pretty high (~40%). its powerful if done with confidence, and more importantly, girls your age aren't used to being complimented. if you compliment her casually and with elegance, she'll probably like you even if she doesn't like your exterior
that's why boys who "get it" young can be so successful during their high school years. finally, just go for it. if you wait too long it'll fail anyway
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EPT
