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You Know What? Stay Inside

Blogs > Shamrock_
Post a Reply
1 2 Next All
Shamrock_
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
South Africa276 Posts
August 30 2011 22:05 GMT
#1
Yes, I'm done telling you about the shitty parts of my life. Instead, I'll tell you why you're better off being inside.

1. People on Starcraft don't punch.
[image loading]
Pictured: MLG


I don't care.

I know you don't. That's because you're not getting punched. Now, the world outside your room is frightening. People can hurt you. You're susceptible to all sorts of germs -- the same germs you see on your keyboard, only they're EVERYWHERE and they're out to get you.

People are dicks. You shouldn't go around trying to meet new people, because odds are, you won't like them. I mean, Hitler didn't play video games. Imagine meeting Hitler.

[center][image loading]
We're onto you, ADOLF.


2. Sunlight.
[image loading]
Deathtrap.


People probably give you a hard time because you're pale. I'm pale as shit. But you know what? Sunlight sucks. Not only is it hot, potentially skin-damaging and hard on your eyes, it also causes cancer. Do you want cancer? No. You don't. Stay inside.

You know who else is pale? Edward Cullen and Robert Pattinson, and chicks LOVE those guys.

[image loading]
Just...don't ask why


3. In the Outside World you have to deal with people's shitty music taste.

Look at this picture:
[image loading]


Seriously. This is what's cool now. These are your pop icons. Brown, white and red--those colors don't even come close to matching. Now read these lyrics:
"There's a place I know
If you're looking for a show.
Where they go hardcore
And there's glitter on the floor."

In the hit song "Take it Off" Kesha (and no I'm not going to spell it with a dollar sign because I have self re--nevermind, Ke$ha) she actually rhymes "hardcore" with "glitter on the floor."

I mean, they're not even trying anymore. Jessie J's song "Price Tag" uses the word "money" EIGHT times in two lines of its chorus, gleefully singing "We don't want your money, money, money, money, forget about the money, money, money, money" and goes on to bitch about the world being screwed over by money when she probably earns more in a day than you could hope for in a month.

This is me ranting. However, if you don't go outside, you're not exposed to this. You don't have to listen to people's shitty music. You can just stay in your room playing Owl City and no one will judge you.

[image loading]
Yeah, Alligator Sky. It's been brought.




I'll post more reasons when I'm more happier. Until then, sit down and play some fucking Starcraft and stop thinking about other shit you should be doing.

***
This is my rifle, this is my gun; this is for fighting, this is for fun
sob3k
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
United States7572 Posts
August 30 2011 22:08 GMT
#2
Complains about pop music

listens to owl city

:/
In Hungry Hungry Hippos there are no such constraints—one can constantly attempt to collect marbles with one’s hippo, limited only by one’s hippo-levering capabilities.
Shamrock_
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
South Africa276 Posts
August 30 2011 22:09 GMT
#3
On August 31 2011 07:08 sob3k wrote:
Complains about pop music

listens to owl city

:/


That was a joke.
This is my rifle, this is my gun; this is for fighting, this is for fun
sob3k
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
United States7572 Posts
August 30 2011 22:11 GMT
#4
On August 31 2011 07:09 Shamrock_ wrote:
Show nested quote +
On August 31 2011 07:08 sob3k wrote:
Complains about pop music

listens to owl city

:/


That was a joke.


u r too subtle 4 me
In Hungry Hungry Hippos there are no such constraints—one can constantly attempt to collect marbles with one’s hippo, limited only by one’s hippo-levering capabilities.
Torte de Lini
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Germany38463 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-08-30 22:26:53
August 30 2011 22:26 GMT
#5
If Zelda didn't go outside, who would save the Princess?
If Mario didn't go outside, what could plumbers aspire to?
If you didn't go outside, how would you know all of this shit sucks.

Granted, you can find out via your computer, but believe it or not, your mother's right: there's more good than bad in the world.

How do I know? Because I ignore the bad and focus on the good.

Besides you're gonna need to go outside, you left your testicles in my fridge, come on over when you man up :3
https://twitter.com/#!/TorteDeLini (@TorteDeLini)
Heyoka
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
Katowice25012 Posts
August 30 2011 22:27 GMT
#6
I feel like if I sat in my room playing Owl City you would judge me. It really hurts the validity of the rest of your arguments.
@RealHeyoka | ESL / DreamHack StarCraft Lead
RoieTRS
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States2569 Posts
August 30 2011 22:28 GMT
#7
I have always rejected reality in the most polite way possible.
konadora, in Racenilatr's blog: "you need to stop thinking about starcraft or anything computer-related for that matter. It's becoming a bad addiction imo"
Torte de Lini
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Germany38463 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-08-30 22:32:32
August 30 2011 22:30 GMT
#8
Getting breaking news that if you hardened your shell, wear headphones and slip on shades you can pass through life without anyone bothering you.

The side-effect is that you look like a douchebag, increase collar height for effectiveness.

You think Dilbert goes in and out of life absorbing all the shit he gets?

[image loading]
https://twitter.com/#!/TorteDeLini (@TorteDeLini)
aisight
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
United States145 Posts
August 30 2011 22:39 GMT
#9
On August 31 2011 07:26 Torte de Lini wrote:
If Zelda didn't go outside, who would save the Princess?


....wat.
Plexa
Profile Blog Joined October 2005
Aotearoa39261 Posts
August 30 2011 22:41 GMT
#10
Oh torte
Administrator~ Spirit will set you free ~
Torte de Lini
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Germany38463 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-08-30 22:44:56
August 30 2011 22:43 GMT
#11
Clearly, the side-effects of being outside have their issues.

Now if you don't mind, I'm going to dinner.

For the record, you guys are all questionably sexist. Can a female not save another unnamed female or is the patriarchal tradition of male saving a female widespread in all forms of media, despite our progressive nature in today's civilized world of the 21st century.

Shame on all of you.
https://twitter.com/#!/TorteDeLini (@TorteDeLini)
SnetteL
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
Belgium473 Posts
August 30 2011 23:01 GMT
#12
On August 31 2011 07:43 Torte de Lini wrote:
Clearly, the side-effects of being outside have their issues.

Now if you don't mind, I'm going to dinner.

For the record, you guys are all questionably sexist. Can a female not save another unnamed female or is the patriarchal tradition of male saving a female widespread in all forms of media, despite our progressive nature in today's civilized world of the 21st century.

Shame on all of you.


And you are racist, speaking about 'the' princess, I think it's about time you acknowledged the Zora people!
Caps lock is cruise control for cool.
Plexa
Profile Blog Joined October 2005
Aotearoa39261 Posts
August 30 2011 23:07 GMT
#13
I don't think he's actually played Zelda so that reference is totally lost on him SnetteL

Besides, he wouldn't be speaking the way he is if he knew about Shiek
Administrator~ Spirit will set you free ~
Torte de Lini
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Germany38463 Posts
August 30 2011 23:12 GMT
#14
I have. The issue is that I was first introduced to Zelda by the CD-I:


Then to Gamecube's WindWaker, but I pre-ordered it so I got the Master Quest and Ocarina of Time CDs!
https://twitter.com/#!/TorteDeLini (@TorteDeLini)
SnetteL
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
Belgium473 Posts
August 30 2011 23:19 GMT
#15
As long as you got trolled by that runner guy you're a true zelda fan to me.
Caps lock is cruise control for cool.
AzTec
Profile Joined August 2010
Canada178 Posts
August 31 2011 01:48 GMT
#16
Pop is actually the highest level of music because people have to get over their own pretensions before they can really enjoy it. The fact that it's mindless stupid drivel is what prevents people who take themselves too seriously (read: "real" music fans) from being able to enjoy it. Pop music is like kryptonite to pretentious people and it's only once someone stops taking themselves so seriously that they can truly enjoy it.

Even the most obtuse genres of music are easier to get into than pop because you don't actually need to change your thinking to enjoy them.
Meepman
Profile Joined December 2009
Canada610 Posts
August 31 2011 01:54 GMT
#17
On August 31 2011 10:48 AzTec wrote:
Pop is actually the highest level of music because people have to get over their own pretensions before they can really enjoy it. The fact that it's mindless stupid drivel is what prevents people who take themselves too seriously (read: "real" music fans) from being able to enjoy it. Pop music is like kryptonite to pretentious people and it's only once someone stops taking themselves so seriously that they can truly enjoy it.

Even the most obtuse genres of music are easier to get into than pop because you don't actually need to change your thinking to enjoy them.



You sir, are a gentleman and a scholar.

My mind has been opened up.
StorkHwaiting
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States3465 Posts
August 31 2011 05:26 GMT
#18
I thought everyone understood Ke$ha was a satire of pop music? Or do people think she's serious about her music? I'm quite confused now. I love Ke$ha because she makes such a mockery of pop. Am I interpreting her artistic vision incorrectly?
flowSthead
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
1065 Posts
August 31 2011 07:42 GMT
#19
I hate to plug my own blog, but you clearly misunderstand Ke$ha.


On August 31 2011 07:05 Shamrock_ wrote:
Seriously. This is what's cool now. These are your pop icons. Brown, white and red--those colors don't even come close to matching. Now read these lyrics:
"There's a place I know
If you're looking for a show.
Where they go hardcore
And there's glitter on the floor."

In the hit song "Take it Off" Kesha (and no I'm not going to spell it with a dollar sign because I have self re--nevermind, Ke$ha) she actually rhymes "hardcore" with "glitter on the floor."


Also what exactly is wrong with that rhyme? "Core" and "Floor" rhyme pretty fluidly. The sentence and meaning behind it may be arguably stupid, but there is in fact nothing wrong with the rhyme itself. Unless I am missing something.
"You can be creative but I will crush it under the iron fist of my conservative play." - Liquid`Tyler █ MVP ■ MC ■ Boxer ■ Grubby █
Shamrock_
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
South Africa276 Posts
August 31 2011 15:19 GMT
#20
On August 31 2011 16:42 flowSthead wrote:
I hate to plug my own blog, but you clearly misunderstand Ke$ha.


Show nested quote +
On August 31 2011 07:05 Shamrock_ wrote:
Seriously. This is what's cool now. These are your pop icons. Brown, white and red--those colors don't even come close to matching. Now read these lyrics:
"There's a place I know
If you're looking for a show.
Where they go hardcore
And there's glitter on the floor."

In the hit song "Take it Off" Kesha (and no I'm not going to spell it with a dollar sign because I have self re--nevermind, Ke$ha) she actually rhymes "hardcore" with "glitter on the floor."


Also what exactly is wrong with that rhyme? "Core" and "Floor" rhyme pretty fluidly. The sentence and meaning behind it may be arguably stupid, but there is in fact nothing wrong with the rhyme itself. Unless I am missing something.


"Core" and "floor" rhyme perfectly, but saying HARDCORE along with GLITTER on the floor is the problem with it.
This is my rifle, this is my gun; this is for fighting, this is for fun
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