|
Before I begin fellow Teamliquiders, allow me to introduce myself. I am Jordan, aka Imjorman, and I am a platinum terran player who is trying to improve and has goals for the masters league.
But my story to tell you today has nothing to do with Starcraft. In fact, Jim Raynor would punch me in the face for the story I am about to riddle to you...
I went and saw a chick flick.
Not just any chick flick, but Bridesmaids. Needless to say, I stuck out like a sore nerdy thumb.
Girls were giggling when "cute" young dogs (some refer to them as "puppies") appeared on screen, laughed at male genitalia jokes, and "ooh'd" and "aw'd" over attractive dresses, wedding decor, and things of like nature.
It made me sick.
Sick. This picture depicts the way I felt perfectly:
![[image loading]](http://i575.photobucket.com/albums/ss195/Kainen44/scared-monkey.png)
I went with my girlfriend/future fiancée because she watches starcraft with me and I felt like she would enjoy it. Boy did she get the better end of the deal. All the jokes weren't bad, and I even laughed some, but trust me brothers, stay and steal nerd's ladder points over seeing this flick if you can help.
I'm posting this blog just to be consoled from my felllow nerds and confess my horrible deed to the community. I returned from the depths of the female kingdom and I'm just telling those behind me to watch from my mistakes.
tl;dr Rather than making your nerd soul be drained of energy and will, stay at home and steal nerds ladder points over seeing the newest chick flick bridesmaids.
 
|
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.
|
On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.
Oh man I'm sorry. Ignorance is a deadly thing, as I experienced this evening 
|
How could you? :O
Thanks for the heads up.
|
On June 07 2011 13:31 edc.initiative wrote:
How could you? :O
Thanks for the heads up.
I know right  Well at least you now know that if the girlfriend asks, your busy, sick, tired, or dying
Also, IDRA if you read this, no matter how attractive she might be, tell her your busy, its not worth it man!
|
|
|
On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.
lol never watched never will
god bless your soul
|
You are either very brave or very stupid...
Anything bridal is bound to be painful. Alas you learnt the hard way.
Welcome back to reality brother, you have seen more than should ever be seen.
|
On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.
I can one up you. I actually went to see Twilight at a theater. -_-
|
And I can top both Bridesmaids and Twilight. I went and saw with my wife:
Jane Eyre
>< -____- and TT
|
rofl there are WAY worse movies than bridesmaids...
|
On June 07 2011 13:39 PH wrote:Show nested quote +On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why. I can one up you. I actually went to see Twilight at a theater. -_-
I read that and thought "I might as well GG to this guy" That sounds horrendous.
Yes, we have all learned the hard way about this disaster.
I'd lie and say that I won't ever make this mistake again, but I love her (don't pass nerd judgement) and would do it again. she does, after all, watch NASL, Day9, and IPL. She doesn't get the game, and I don't pretend to understand these female movies (often referred to as "chick flicks").
But needless to say, I don't understand how a dog with a bowtie is cute...it should be animal cruelty.
Yes, I said that, A DOG WITH A BOWTIE...disgusting
|
On June 07 2011 13:48 imjorman wrote:+ Show Spoiler +On June 07 2011 13:39 PH wrote:Show nested quote +On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why. I can one up you. I actually went to see Twilight at a theater. -_- I read that and thought "I might as well GG to this guy" That sounds horrendous. Yes, we have all learned the hard way about this disaster. I'd lie and say that I won't ever make this mistake again, but I love her (don't pass nerd judgement) and would do it again. she does, after all, watch NASL, Day9, and IPL. She doesn't get the game, and I don't pretend to understand these female movies (often referred to as "chick flicks"). + Show Spoiler +But needless to say, I don't understand how a dog with a bowtie is cute...it should be animal cruelty. Yes, I said that, A DOG WITH A BOWTIE...disgusting
Don't know why anyone would pass "Nerd judgement" on you?
I have a confession to make. I was a little hipocritical earlier. I have had to sit through the entire BBC version of Pride and Prejudice and it wasn't with my girlfriend...
I will say that I was hungover and the girl is a really good friend of mine. I had crashed at her place and she wouldn't let me leave until we finished. I kept falling asleep so she would rewind to the last place she saw me awake. It took 7 HOURS to finish.
So there you go, we all stray from the path...
|
On June 07 2011 14:08 Probulous wrote:Show nested quote +On June 07 2011 13:48 imjorman wrote:+ Show Spoiler +On June 07 2011 13:39 PH wrote:Show nested quote +On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why. I can one up you. I actually went to see Twilight at a theater. -_- I read that and thought "I might as well GG to this guy" That sounds horrendous. Yes, we have all learned the hard way about this disaster. I'd lie and say that I won't ever make this mistake again, but I love her (don't pass nerd judgement) and would do it again. she does, after all, watch NASL, Day9, and IPL. She doesn't get the game, and I don't pretend to understand these female movies (often referred to as "chick flicks"). + Show Spoiler +But needless to say, I don't understand how a dog with a bowtie is cute...it should be animal cruelty. Yes, I said that, A DOG WITH A BOWTIE...disgusting Don't know why anyone would pass "Nerd judgement" on you? I have a confession to make. I was a little hipocritical earlier. I have had to sit through the entire BBC version of Pride and Prejudice and it wasn't with my girlfriend... I will say that I was hungover and the girl is a really good friend of mine. I had crashed at her place and she wouldn't let me leave until we finished. I kept falling asleep so she would rewind to the last place she saw me awake. It took 7 HOURS to finish. So there you go, we all stray from the path...
Oh dear. Are you ok? I'll let you cheese me in some custom games to get your nerdiness back. I think you need to go watch Tastosis for a while : /
|
On June 07 2011 14:10 imjorman wrote:Show nested quote +On June 07 2011 14:08 Probulous wrote:On June 07 2011 13:48 imjorman wrote:+ Show Spoiler +On June 07 2011 13:39 PH wrote:Show nested quote +On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why. I can one up you. I actually went to see Twilight at a theater. -_- I read that and thought "I might as well GG to this guy" That sounds horrendous. Yes, we have all learned the hard way about this disaster. I'd lie and say that I won't ever make this mistake again, but I love her (don't pass nerd judgement) and would do it again. she does, after all, watch NASL, Day9, and IPL. She doesn't get the game, and I don't pretend to understand these female movies (often referred to as "chick flicks"). + Show Spoiler +But needless to say, I don't understand how a dog with a bowtie is cute...it should be animal cruelty. Yes, I said that, A DOG WITH A BOWTIE...disgusting Don't know why anyone would pass "Nerd judgement" on you? I have a confession to make. I was a little hipocritical earlier. I have had to sit through the entire BBC version of Pride and Prejudice and it wasn't with my girlfriend... I will say that I was hungover and the girl is a really good friend of mine. I had crashed at her place and she wouldn't let me leave until we finished. I kept falling asleep so she would rewind to the last place she saw me awake. It took 7 HOURS to finish. So there you go, we all stray from the path... Oh dear. Are you ok? I'll let you cheese me in some custom games to get your nerdiness back. I think you need to go watch Tastosis for a while : /
It was about six years ago, so all is good. Strangely, I am still friends with her...
Sucker for punishment I guess.
|
On June 07 2011 14:12 Probulous wrote:Show nested quote +On June 07 2011 14:10 imjorman wrote:On June 07 2011 14:08 Probulous wrote:On June 07 2011 13:48 imjorman wrote:+ Show Spoiler +On June 07 2011 13:39 PH wrote:Show nested quote +On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why. I can one up you. I actually went to see Twilight at a theater. -_- I read that and thought "I might as well GG to this guy" That sounds horrendous. Yes, we have all learned the hard way about this disaster. I'd lie and say that I won't ever make this mistake again, but I love her (don't pass nerd judgement) and would do it again. she does, after all, watch NASL, Day9, and IPL. She doesn't get the game, and I don't pretend to understand these female movies (often referred to as "chick flicks"). + Show Spoiler +But needless to say, I don't understand how a dog with a bowtie is cute...it should be animal cruelty. Yes, I said that, A DOG WITH A BOWTIE...disgusting Don't know why anyone would pass "Nerd judgement" on you? I have a confession to make. I was a little hipocritical earlier. I have had to sit through the entire BBC version of Pride and Prejudice and it wasn't with my girlfriend... I will say that I was hungover and the girl is a really good friend of mine. I had crashed at her place and she wouldn't let me leave until we finished. I kept falling asleep so she would rewind to the last place she saw me awake. It took 7 HOURS to finish. So there you go, we all stray from the path... Oh dear. Are you ok? I'll let you cheese me in some custom games to get your nerdiness back. I think you need to go watch Tastosis for a while : / It was about six years ago, so all is good. Strangely, I am still friends with her... Sucker for punishment I guess.
The female race has an interesting effect on the male. It's like...being mind controlled by an infestor. You just don't know what to do.
|
|
|
Bridesmaids was actually not terrible, and that's coming from a guy who hates most movies. It's got enough over-all humor in it to keep my attention, and the one Irish cop guy did a decent job acting. Other then that it was pretty bad, but not the worst chick flick ever.
|
On June 07 2011 14:35 bellhop wrote:
Bridesmaids was actually not terrible, and that's coming from a guy who hates most movies. It's got enough over-all humor in it to keep my attention, and the one Irish cop guy did a decent job acting. Other then that it was pretty bad, but not the worst chick flick ever.
Well yeah, the Notebook has that award wrapped up.
I don't want to talk about it -.-
|
Can you even consider Bridesmaids a chick flick? It just felt like an extended SNL skit for the most part. There are wayyyy worse ones out there.
|
intrigue
Washington, D.C9933 Posts
hold on. let's hear more about the future fiancee part.
|
If you guys want to watch good movies
Breaking dawn is the best movie that I ever saw. You guys will all enjoy it.
|
the heck i thought bridesmaids was hilarious .... TT
|
I, too, sir, have traveled to that very land. A place where females thrive on stereotyping men as "walking aroused dicks" and gasp at the very site of any animal with fur and exaggerated size of eyes.
![[image loading]](http://allwomenstalk.com/wp-content/uploads/cute-pets/pic-cuttest-pets-ever-9.jpg) Voici un exemple
It was many years ago and the more I think back the more it pains me to relive such a torture. I figured it'd be a delightful film, a movie revolving around trivial matters and with a moral dart to truly sucker those who are gullible to their own emotions. True, I was being dragged along equally to see it, I kept my head held high and knew I was better than all these women of various shapes, sizes (yet pretentiously capable of rejecting my stares and luring gestures with my hands).
I didn't know what the movie was called, but the young dame who has shackled me to this 2 hour dawn of torment told me a woman named "Rachel McAdams' was in it. My eyebrows frowned with curiosity. Rachel McAdams? I flipped through my achronological memories to see if I can recall who she was. She must have been the leader of this cult of females who dare to perpetuate wild notions of love like: Some boy will be "The One" or the better: "We were meant to be together, it was destiny"!
On my side, I felt my date coil up around me, her legs bent and her face making an imprint on my sleeve. No matter what, I couldn't leave and I gripped the arms of my chair and held my breath as the opening credits started...
In cursive letters, the title waltzed on screen.
The Notebook
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3G3fILPQAU
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
Not The Notebook! Anything but this. I hastily darted my eyes towards the nearest exit! I need to get out of here! I've heard horrors of this movie: An arrogant southerner, portrayed as a simpleton with simple needs and simple desires, falls in love with a female who comes from narrow-minded rich family. Somehow, contrasting lifestyles makes their love an intertwining contradiction of disapproval and hormonal sexual passion.
I tried to slip out, unravel myself like a cobra, but my date only clenched hard and my body receded all physical feeling. My mind became clouded as the movie pressed on, it tumbled through emotions I tried so hard to suppress with my testosterone. I stave the movie off with its creeping need to moist my eyes with questions of trivial logic: Why are they kissing in the rain? Why is he being such an annoying prick? Oh my God, just kiss already!
Wait, what? That wasn't a question. My ball and chain of breasts and revealing clothes has already lost the battle and my sleeve soon became a tissue. Damn her, I will not succumb to this film! NEVER! Back, back you fiendish ghoul of human-like sentiments! I said back!
The final scene rolled: the elderly man reading to the female. This cheap knock-off of Romeo and Juliet was nearly over and I will have survived when the final clincher bellowed from the main character's words...
Oh God...
The lights rolled forward and I shut my eyes hard before a tissue painted below the socket: "There there" she said: "guess the movie really hit home for you, eh?"
Fuck... she was right. I nodded and clamped my hands with her's. It truly did, I realized, as I jumped in our pick-up truck back to Alabama.
It truly did...
|
Dude in the op i know exactly how you feel, with one of my ex's i saw atonement in the theatre, and dear god that was the most boring/sappy 2 hours of my life.
Needless to say after going home i immedietly watched 300 hoping there was some traces of tesosterone in my body after seeing that god awful movie.
at least your gf is cool with watching starcraft, and sometimes you gotta give a little, it may have been boring but at least she was happy
|
ALLEYCAT BLUES50107 Posts
meh,every bollywood would be a chick flick if it weren't for the songs in between and the random fight scenes.
|
On June 07 2011 15:00 Torte de Lini wrote:+ Show Spoiler +I, too, sir, have traveled to that very land. A place where females thrive on stereotyping men as "walking aroused dicks" and gasp at the very site of any animal with fur and exaggerated size of eyes. Voici un exemple It was many years ago and the more I think back the more it pains me to relive such a torture. I figured it'd be a delightful film, a movie revolving around trivial matters and with a moral dart to truly sucker those who are gullible to their own emotions. True, I was being dragged along equally to see it, I kept my head held high and knew I was better than all these women of various shapes, sizes (yet pretentiously capable of rejecting my stares and luring gestures with my hands). I didn't know what the movie was called, but the young dame who has shackled me to this 2 hour dawn of torment told me a woman named "Rachel McAdams' was in it. My eyebrows frowned with curiosity. Rachel McAdams? I flipped through my achronological memories to see if I can recall who she was. She must have been the leader of this cult of females who dare to perpetuate wild notions of love like: Some boy will be "The One" or the better: "We were meant to be together, it was destiny"! On my side, I felt my date coil up around me, her legs bent and her face making an imprint on my sleeve. No matter what, I couldn't leave and I gripped the arms of my chair and held my breath as the opening credits started... In cursive letters, the title waltzed on screen. The Notebook http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3G3fILPQAU NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! Not The Notebook! Anything but this. I hastily darted my eyes towards the nearest exit! I need to get out of here! I've heard horrors of this movie: An arrogant southerner, portrayed as a simpleton with simple needs and simple desires, falls in love with a female who comes from narrow-minded rich family. Somehow, contrasting lifestyles makes their love an intertwining contradiction of disapproval and hormonal sexual passion. I tried to slip out, unravel myself like a cobra, but my date only clenched hard and my body receded all physical feeling. My mind became clouded as the movie pressed on, it tumbled through emotions I tried so hard to suppress with my testosterone. I stave the movie off with its creeping need to moist my eyes with questions of trivial logic: Why are they kissing in the rain? Why is he being such an annoying prick? Oh my God, just kiss already! Wait, what? That wasn't a question. My ball and chain of breasts and revealing clothes has already lost the battle and my sleeve soon became a tissue. Damn her, I will not succumb to this film! NEVER! Back, back you fiendish ghoul of human-like sentiments! I said back! The final scene rolled: the elderly man reading to the female. This cheap knock-off of Romeo and Juliet was nearly over and I will have survived when the final clincher bellowed from the main character's words... Oh God... The lights rolled forward and I shut my eyes hard before a tissue painted below the socket: "There there" she said: "guess the movie really hit home for you, eh?" Fuck... she was right. I nodded and clamped my hands with her's. It truly did, I realized, as I jumped in our pick-up truck back to Alabama. It truly did...
That is truly touching...
I prefer Disney movies if I want to cry, Lion King for the win. But each to their own. I guess you didn't have a choice.
BTW I would never have picked you as a pickup driver.
Don't know why, but there you go.
|
hmm, i actually heard from friends with great taste in movies that this one goes far and beyond above the chick flick stereotype and that it's just a good comedy for anyone to watch. guess i'll have to check it out and see.
as for the guy who complained about watching Twilight out of ignorance, bro, i've watched the first two years after release because, being drunk at the time with a couple friends, i just couldn't contain my curiosity as to why people were saying that it's the shittiest thing to ever happen to cinema. and boy, did i get punished; to this day, watching that shit remains one of my biggest shames in life.
|
On June 07 2011 15:05 Probulous wrote:Show nested quote +On June 07 2011 15:00 Torte de Lini wrote:+ Show Spoiler +I, too, sir, have traveled to that very land. A place where females thrive on stereotyping men as "walking aroused dicks" and gasp at the very site of any animal with fur and exaggerated size of eyes. Voici un exemple It was many years ago and the more I think back the more it pains me to relive such a torture. I figured it'd be a delightful film, a movie revolving around trivial matters and with a moral dart to truly sucker those who are gullible to their own emotions. True, I was being dragged along equally to see it, I kept my head held high and knew I was better than all these women of various shapes, sizes (yet pretentiously capable of rejecting my stares and luring gestures with my hands). I didn't know what the movie was called, but the young dame who has shackled me to this 2 hour dawn of torment told me a woman named "Rachel McAdams' was in it. My eyebrows frowned with curiosity. Rachel McAdams? I flipped through my achronological memories to see if I can recall who she was. She must have been the leader of this cult of females who dare to perpetuate wild notions of love like: Some boy will be "The One" or the better: "We were meant to be together, it was destiny"! On my side, I felt my date coil up around me, her legs bent and her face making an imprint on my sleeve. No matter what, I couldn't leave and I gripped the arms of my chair and held my breath as the opening credits started... In cursive letters, the title waltzed on screen. The Notebook http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3G3fILPQAU NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! Not The Notebook! Anything but this. I hastily darted my eyes towards the nearest exit! I need to get out of here! I've heard horrors of this movie: An arrogant southerner, portrayed as a simpleton with simple needs and simple desires, falls in love with a female who comes from narrow-minded rich family. Somehow, contrasting lifestyles makes their love an intertwining contradiction of disapproval and hormonal sexual passion. I tried to slip out, unravel myself like a cobra, but my date only clenched hard and my body receded all physical feeling. My mind became clouded as the movie pressed on, it tumbled through emotions I tried so hard to suppress with my testosterone. I stave the movie off with its creeping need to moist my eyes with questions of trivial logic: Why are they kissing in the rain? Why is he being such an annoying prick? Oh my God, just kiss already! Wait, what? That wasn't a question. My ball and chain of breasts and revealing clothes has already lost the battle and my sleeve soon became a tissue. Damn her, I will not succumb to this film! NEVER! Back, back you fiendish ghoul of human-like sentiments! I said back! The final scene rolled: the elderly man reading to the female. This cheap knock-off of Romeo and Juliet was nearly over and I will have survived when the final clincher bellowed from the main character's words... Oh God... The lights rolled forward and I shut my eyes hard before a tissue painted below the socket: "There there" she said: "guess the movie really hit home for you, eh?" Fuck... she was right. I nodded and clamped my hands with her's. It truly did, I realized, as I jumped in our pick-up truck back to Alabama. It truly did... That is truly touching... I prefer Disney movies if I want to cry, Lion King for the win. But each to their own. I guess you didn't have a choice. BTW I would never have picked you as a pickup driver. Don't know why, but there you go.
It's frictional.
|
On June 07 2011 14:52 intrigue wrote:
hold on. let's hear more about the future fiancee part.
Well...we're dating obviously, but like due to financial situation, we're delaying our engagement and marriage. In addition, we wouldn't be getting married until after college anyway, so getting married while she's still a sophomore (I"'ll be a junior in the fall) would be kind of ridiculous and pointless anyway.
tl;dr we're getting married just taking our time with it.
|
On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.
You have definitely broken every rule that I set for myself by watching that movie, you sir should be ashamed. To the op I gotta say man nothing wrong with watching some random chick flick on the week that pops into theaters, I've done that plenty with gf's and usually enjoyed them. I admit I wont watch Bridesmaids but if I was dating some chick who really wanted to well, I guess I'd just have to lol.
|
|
|
|
|
|
EPT
