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Brothers...I have traveled where no man should...

Blogs > imjorman
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imjorman
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States580 Posts
June 07 2011 04:24 GMT
#1
Before I begin fellow Teamliquiders, allow me to introduce myself. I am Jordan, aka Imjorman, and I am a platinum terran player who is trying to improve and has goals for the masters league.

But my story to tell you today has nothing to do with Starcraft. In fact, Jim Raynor would punch me in the face for the story I am about to riddle to you...

I went and saw a chick flick.

Not just any chick flick, but Bridesmaids. Needless to say, I stuck out like a sore nerdy thumb.

Girls were giggling when "cute" young dogs (some refer to them as "puppies") appeared on screen, laughed at male genitalia jokes, and "ooh'd" and "aw'd" over attractive dresses, wedding decor, and things of like nature.

It made me sick.

Sick. This picture depicts the way I felt perfectly:

[image loading]

I went with my girlfriend/future fiancée because she watches starcraft with me and I felt like she would enjoy it. Boy did she get the better end of the deal. All the jokes weren't bad, and I even laughed some, but trust me brothers, stay and steal nerd's ladder points over seeing this flick if you can help.

I'm posting this blog just to be consoled from my felllow nerds and confess my horrible deed to the community. I returned from the depths of the female kingdom and I'm just telling those behind me to watch from my mistakes.

tl;dr Rather than making your nerd soul be drained of energy and will, stay at home and steal nerds ladder points over seeing the newest chick flick bridesmaids.

****
People who want power shouldn't have it.
Chairman Ray
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
United States11903 Posts
June 07 2011 04:26 GMT
#2
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.
imjorman
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States580 Posts
June 07 2011 04:30 GMT
#3
On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.


Oh man I'm sorry. Ignorance is a deadly thing, as I experienced this evening
People who want power shouldn't have it.
edc
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
United States666 Posts
June 07 2011 04:31 GMT
#4
How could you? :O

Thanks for the heads up.
“There are two kinds of people in this world, those with loaded guns, and those who dig. You dig.” - Clint Eastwood
imjorman
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States580 Posts
June 07 2011 04:33 GMT
#5
On June 07 2011 13:31 edc.initiative wrote:
How could you? :O

Thanks for the heads up.


I know right Well at least you now know that if the girlfriend asks, your busy, sick, tired, or dying

Also, IDRA if you read this, no matter how attractive she might be, tell her your busy, its not worth it man!
People who want power shouldn't have it.
d_so
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
Korea (South)3262 Posts
June 07 2011 04:37 GMT
#6
i like chick flicks.
manner
shinjin
Profile Joined January 2010
United States398 Posts
June 07 2011 04:37 GMT
#7
On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.


lol never watched never will
god bless your soul
give it one more try because the best things in life dont come free.
Probulous
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Australia3894 Posts
June 07 2011 04:38 GMT
#8
You are either very brave or very stupid...

Anything bridal is bound to be painful. Alas you learnt the hard way.

Welcome back to reality brother, you have seen more than should ever be seen.
"Dude has some really interesting midgame switches that I wouldn't have expected. "I violated your house" into "HIHO THE DAIRY OH!" really threw me. You don't usually expect children's poetry harass as a follow up " - AmericanUmlaut
PH
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
United States6173 Posts
June 07 2011 04:39 GMT
#9
On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.

I can one up you. I actually went to see Twilight at a theater. -_-
Hello
DyEnasTy
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States3714 Posts
June 07 2011 04:41 GMT
#10
And I can top both Bridesmaids and Twilight. I went and saw with my wife:





Jane Eyre




>< -____- and TT
Much better to die an awesome Terran than to live as a magic wielding fairy or a mindless sac of biological goop. -Manifesto7
EPO
Profile Joined August 2009
Canada341 Posts
June 07 2011 04:48 GMT
#11
rofl there are WAY worse movies than bridesmaids...
imjorman
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States580 Posts
June 07 2011 04:48 GMT
#12
On June 07 2011 13:39 PH wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.

I can one up you. I actually went to see Twilight at a theater. -_-


I read that and thought "I might as well GG to this guy" That sounds horrendous.

Yes, we have all learned the hard way about this disaster.

I'd lie and say that I won't ever make this mistake again, but I love her (don't pass nerd judgement) and would do it again. she does, after all, watch NASL, Day9, and IPL. She doesn't get the game, and I don't pretend to understand these female movies (often referred to as "chick flicks").

But needless to say, I don't understand how a dog with a bowtie is cute...it should be animal cruelty.

Yes, I said that, A DOG WITH A BOWTIE...disgusting
People who want power shouldn't have it.
Probulous
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Australia3894 Posts
June 07 2011 05:08 GMT
#13
On June 07 2011 13:48 imjorman wrote:+ Show Spoiler +

On June 07 2011 13:39 PH wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.

I can one up you. I actually went to see Twilight at a theater. -_-


I read that and thought "I might as well GG to this guy" That sounds horrendous.

Yes, we have all learned the hard way about this disaster.

I'd lie and say that I won't ever make this mistake again, but I love her (don't pass nerd judgement) and would do it again. she does, after all, watch NASL, Day9, and IPL. She doesn't get the game, and I don't pretend to understand these female movies (often referred to as "chick flicks").
+ Show Spoiler +

But needless to say, I don't understand how a dog with a bowtie is cute...it should be animal cruelty.

Yes, I said that, A DOG WITH A BOWTIE...disgusting


Don't know why anyone would pass "Nerd judgement" on you?

I have a confession to make. I was a little hipocritical earlier. I have had to sit through the entire BBC version of Pride and Prejudice and it wasn't with my girlfriend...

I will say that I was hungover and the girl is a really good friend of mine. I had crashed at her place and she wouldn't let me leave until we finished. I kept falling asleep so she would rewind to the last place she saw me awake. It took 7 HOURS to finish.

So there you go, we all stray from the path...
"Dude has some really interesting midgame switches that I wouldn't have expected. "I violated your house" into "HIHO THE DAIRY OH!" really threw me. You don't usually expect children's poetry harass as a follow up " - AmericanUmlaut
imjorman
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States580 Posts
June 07 2011 05:10 GMT
#14
On June 07 2011 14:08 Probulous wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 07 2011 13:48 imjorman wrote:+ Show Spoiler +

On June 07 2011 13:39 PH wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.

I can one up you. I actually went to see Twilight at a theater. -_-


I read that and thought "I might as well GG to this guy" That sounds horrendous.

Yes, we have all learned the hard way about this disaster.

I'd lie and say that I won't ever make this mistake again, but I love her (don't pass nerd judgement) and would do it again. she does, after all, watch NASL, Day9, and IPL. She doesn't get the game, and I don't pretend to understand these female movies (often referred to as "chick flicks").
+ Show Spoiler +

But needless to say, I don't understand how a dog with a bowtie is cute...it should be animal cruelty.

Yes, I said that, A DOG WITH A BOWTIE...disgusting


Don't know why anyone would pass "Nerd judgement" on you?

I have a confession to make. I was a little hipocritical earlier. I have had to sit through the entire BBC version of Pride and Prejudice and it wasn't with my girlfriend...

I will say that I was hungover and the girl is a really good friend of mine. I had crashed at her place and she wouldn't let me leave until we finished. I kept falling asleep so she would rewind to the last place she saw me awake. It took 7 HOURS to finish.

So there you go, we all stray from the path...


Oh dear. Are you ok? I'll let you cheese me in some custom games to get your nerdiness back. I think you need to go watch Tastosis for a while : /
People who want power shouldn't have it.
Probulous
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Australia3894 Posts
June 07 2011 05:12 GMT
#15
On June 07 2011 14:10 imjorman wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 07 2011 14:08 Probulous wrote:
On June 07 2011 13:48 imjorman wrote:+ Show Spoiler +

On June 07 2011 13:39 PH wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.

I can one up you. I actually went to see Twilight at a theater. -_-


I read that and thought "I might as well GG to this guy" That sounds horrendous.

Yes, we have all learned the hard way about this disaster.

I'd lie and say that I won't ever make this mistake again, but I love her (don't pass nerd judgement) and would do it again. she does, after all, watch NASL, Day9, and IPL. She doesn't get the game, and I don't pretend to understand these female movies (often referred to as "chick flicks").
+ Show Spoiler +

But needless to say, I don't understand how a dog with a bowtie is cute...it should be animal cruelty.

Yes, I said that, A DOG WITH A BOWTIE...disgusting


Don't know why anyone would pass "Nerd judgement" on you?

I have a confession to make. I was a little hipocritical earlier. I have had to sit through the entire BBC version of Pride and Prejudice and it wasn't with my girlfriend...

I will say that I was hungover and the girl is a really good friend of mine. I had crashed at her place and she wouldn't let me leave until we finished. I kept falling asleep so she would rewind to the last place she saw me awake. It took 7 HOURS to finish.

So there you go, we all stray from the path...


Oh dear. Are you ok? I'll let you cheese me in some custom games to get your nerdiness back. I think you need to go watch Tastosis for a while : /


It was about six years ago, so all is good. Strangely, I am still friends with her...

Sucker for punishment I guess.
"Dude has some really interesting midgame switches that I wouldn't have expected. "I violated your house" into "HIHO THE DAIRY OH!" really threw me. You don't usually expect children's poetry harass as a follow up " - AmericanUmlaut
imjorman
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States580 Posts
June 07 2011 05:15 GMT
#16
On June 07 2011 14:12 Probulous wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 07 2011 14:10 imjorman wrote:
On June 07 2011 14:08 Probulous wrote:
On June 07 2011 13:48 imjorman wrote:+ Show Spoiler +

On June 07 2011 13:39 PH wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.

I can one up you. I actually went to see Twilight at a theater. -_-


I read that and thought "I might as well GG to this guy" That sounds horrendous.

Yes, we have all learned the hard way about this disaster.

I'd lie and say that I won't ever make this mistake again, but I love her (don't pass nerd judgement) and would do it again. she does, after all, watch NASL, Day9, and IPL. She doesn't get the game, and I don't pretend to understand these female movies (often referred to as "chick flicks").
+ Show Spoiler +

But needless to say, I don't understand how a dog with a bowtie is cute...it should be animal cruelty.

Yes, I said that, A DOG WITH A BOWTIE...disgusting


Don't know why anyone would pass "Nerd judgement" on you?

I have a confession to make. I was a little hipocritical earlier. I have had to sit through the entire BBC version of Pride and Prejudice and it wasn't with my girlfriend...

I will say that I was hungover and the girl is a really good friend of mine. I had crashed at her place and she wouldn't let me leave until we finished. I kept falling asleep so she would rewind to the last place she saw me awake. It took 7 HOURS to finish.

So there you go, we all stray from the path...


Oh dear. Are you ok? I'll let you cheese me in some custom games to get your nerdiness back. I think you need to go watch Tastosis for a while : /


It was about six years ago, so all is good. Strangely, I am still friends with her...

Sucker for punishment I guess.


The female race has an interesting effect on the male. It's like...being mind controlled by an infestor. You just don't know what to do.
People who want power shouldn't have it.
DamageControL
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States4222 Posts
June 07 2011 05:27 GMT
#17
I like chickflicks :X
Liquid | SKT
bellhop
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
United States165 Posts
June 07 2011 05:35 GMT
#18
Bridesmaids was actually not terrible, and that's coming from a guy who hates most movies. It's got enough over-all humor in it to keep my attention, and the one Irish cop guy did a decent job acting. Other then that it was pretty bad, but not the worst chick flick ever.
Ceci n'est pas une disloqueur.
MutaDoom
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Canada1163 Posts
June 07 2011 05:41 GMT
#19
On June 07 2011 14:35 bellhop wrote:
Bridesmaids was actually not terrible, and that's coming from a guy who hates most movies. It's got enough over-all humor in it to keep my attention, and the one Irish cop guy did a decent job acting. Other then that it was pretty bad, but not the worst chick flick ever.

Well yeah, the Notebook has that award wrapped up.

I don't want to talk about it -.-
strongwind
Profile Joined July 2007
United States862 Posts
June 07 2011 05:45 GMT
#20
Can you even consider Bridesmaids a chick flick? It just felt like an extended SNL skit for the most part. There are wayyyy worse ones out there.
Taek Bang Fighting!
intrigue
Profile Blog Joined November 2005
Washington, D.C9934 Posts
June 07 2011 05:52 GMT
#21
hold on. let's hear more about the future fiancee part.
Moderatorhttps://soundcloud.com/castlesmusic/sets/oak
aztrorisk
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States896 Posts
June 07 2011 05:56 GMT
#22
If you guys want to watch good movies

Breaking dawn is the best movie that I ever saw. You guys will all enjoy it.
A lock that opens to many keys is a bad lock. A key that opens many locks is a master key.
GumThief
Profile Joined April 2010
Canada284 Posts
June 07 2011 05:59 GMT
#23
the heck i thought bridesmaids was hilarious .... TT
:))
Torte de Lini
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Germany38463 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-06-07 06:00:46
June 07 2011 06:00 GMT
#24
I, too, sir, have traveled to that very land. A place where females thrive on stereotyping men as "walking aroused dicks" and gasp at the very site of any animal with fur and exaggerated size of eyes.

[image loading]

Voici un exemple


It was many years ago and the more I think back the more it pains me to relive such a torture. I figured it'd be a delightful film, a movie revolving around trivial matters and with a moral dart to truly sucker those who are gullible to their own emotions. True, I was being dragged along equally to see it, I kept my head held high and knew I was better than all these women of various shapes, sizes (yet pretentiously capable of rejecting my stares and luring gestures with my hands).

I didn't know what the movie was called, but the young dame who has shackled me to this 2 hour dawn of torment told me a woman named "Rachel McAdams' was in it. My eyebrows frowned with curiosity. Rachel McAdams? I flipped through my achronological memories to see if I can recall who she was. She must have been the leader of this cult of females who dare to perpetuate wild notions of love like: Some boy will be "The One" or the better: "We were meant to be together, it was destiny"!

On my side, I felt my date coil up around me, her legs bent and her face making an imprint on my sleeve. No matter what, I couldn't leave and I gripped the arms of my chair and held my breath as the opening credits started...

In cursive letters, the title waltzed on screen.

The Notebook


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3G3fILPQAU


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Not The Notebook! Anything but this. I hastily darted my eyes towards the nearest exit! I need to get out of here! I've heard horrors of this movie: An arrogant southerner, portrayed as a simpleton with simple needs and simple desires, falls in love with a female who comes from narrow-minded rich family. Somehow, contrasting lifestyles makes their love an intertwining contradiction of disapproval and hormonal sexual passion.

I tried to slip out, unravel myself like a cobra, but my date only clenched hard and my body receded all physical feeling. My mind became clouded as the movie pressed on, it tumbled through emotions I tried so hard to suppress with my testosterone. I stave the movie off with its creeping need to moist my eyes with questions of trivial logic: Why are they kissing in the rain? Why is he being such an annoying prick? Oh my God, just kiss already!

Wait, what? That wasn't a question. My ball and chain of breasts and revealing clothes has already lost the battle and my sleeve soon became a tissue. Damn her, I will not succumb to this film! NEVER! Back, back you fiendish ghoul of human-like sentiments! I said back!

The final scene rolled: the elderly man reading to the female. This cheap knock-off of Romeo and Juliet was nearly over and I will have survived when the final clincher bellowed from the main character's words...

Oh God...

The lights rolled forward and I shut my eyes hard before a tissue painted below the socket: "There there" she said: "guess the movie really hit home for you, eh?"

Fuck... she was right. I nodded and clamped my hands with her's. It truly did, I realized, as I jumped in our pick-up truck back to Alabama.

It truly did...
https://twitter.com/#!/TorteDeLini (@TorteDeLini)
Soviet_Birthday
Profile Joined October 2010
United States48 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-06-07 06:02:00
June 07 2011 06:00 GMT
#25
Dude in the op i know exactly how you feel, with one of my ex's i saw atonement in the theatre, and dear god that was the most boring/sappy 2 hours of my life.

Needless to say after going home i immedietly watched 300 hoping there was some traces of tesosterone in my body after seeing that god awful movie.

at least your gf is cool with watching starcraft, and sometimes you gotta give a little, it may have been boring but at least she was happy
If I see Haruhi cosplayers do the time warp, I will have witnessed all this world has to offer
BLinD-RawR
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
ALLEYCAT BLUES50468 Posts
June 07 2011 06:04 GMT
#26
meh,every bollywood would be a chick flick if it weren't for the songs in between and the random fight scenes.
Brood War EICWoo Jung Ho, never forget.| Twitter: @BLinDRawR
Probulous
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Australia3894 Posts
June 07 2011 06:05 GMT
#27
On June 07 2011 15:00 Torte de Lini wrote:+ Show Spoiler +

I, too, sir, have traveled to that very land. A place where females thrive on stereotyping men as "walking aroused dicks" and gasp at the very site of any animal with fur and exaggerated size of eyes.

[image loading]

Voici un exemple


It was many years ago and the more I think back the more it pains me to relive such a torture. I figured it'd be a delightful film, a movie revolving around trivial matters and with a moral dart to truly sucker those who are gullible to their own emotions. True, I was being dragged along equally to see it, I kept my head held high and knew I was better than all these women of various shapes, sizes (yet pretentiously capable of rejecting my stares and luring gestures with my hands).

I didn't know what the movie was called, but the young dame who has shackled me to this 2 hour dawn of torment told me a woman named "Rachel McAdams' was in it. My eyebrows frowned with curiosity. Rachel McAdams? I flipped through my achronological memories to see if I can recall who she was. She must have been the leader of this cult of females who dare to perpetuate wild notions of love like: Some boy will be "The One" or the better: "We were meant to be together, it was destiny"!

On my side, I felt my date coil up around me, her legs bent and her face making an imprint on my sleeve. No matter what, I couldn't leave and I gripped the arms of my chair and held my breath as the opening credits started...

In cursive letters, the title waltzed on screen.

The Notebook


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3G3fILPQAU


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Not The Notebook! Anything but this. I hastily darted my eyes towards the nearest exit! I need to get out of here! I've heard horrors of this movie: An arrogant southerner, portrayed as a simpleton with simple needs and simple desires, falls in love with a female who comes from narrow-minded rich family. Somehow, contrasting lifestyles makes their love an intertwining contradiction of disapproval and hormonal sexual passion.

I tried to slip out, unravel myself like a cobra, but my date only clenched hard and my body receded all physical feeling. My mind became clouded as the movie pressed on, it tumbled through emotions I tried so hard to suppress with my testosterone. I stave the movie off with its creeping need to moist my eyes with questions of trivial logic: Why are they kissing in the rain? Why is he being such an annoying prick? Oh my God, just kiss already!

Wait, what? That wasn't a question. My ball and chain of breasts and revealing clothes has already lost the battle and my sleeve soon became a tissue. Damn her, I will not succumb to this film! NEVER! Back, back you fiendish ghoul of human-like sentiments! I said back!

The final scene rolled: the elderly man reading to the female. This cheap knock-off of Romeo and Juliet was nearly over and I will have survived when the final clincher bellowed from the main character's words...

Oh God...

The lights rolled forward and I shut my eyes hard before a tissue painted below the socket: "There there" she said: "guess the movie really hit home for you, eh?"

Fuck... she was right. I nodded and clamped my hands with her's. It truly did, I realized, as I jumped in our pick-up truck back to Alabama.

It truly did...


That is truly touching...

I prefer Disney movies if I want to cry, Lion King for the win. But each to their own. I guess you didn't have a choice.

BTW I would never have picked you as a pickup driver.

Don't know why, but there you go.
"Dude has some really interesting midgame switches that I wouldn't have expected. "I violated your house" into "HIHO THE DAIRY OH!" really threw me. You don't usually expect children's poetry harass as a follow up " - AmericanUmlaut
anatem
Profile Joined September 2010
Romania1369 Posts
June 07 2011 08:57 GMT
#28
hmm, i actually heard from friends with great taste in movies that this one goes far and beyond above the chick flick stereotype and that it's just a good comedy for anyone to watch. guess i'll have to check it out and see.

as for the guy who complained about watching Twilight out of ignorance, bro, i've watched the first two years after release because, being drunk at the time with a couple friends, i just couldn't contain my curiosity as to why people were saying that it's the shittiest thing to ever happen to cinema. and boy, did i get punished; to this day, watching that shit remains one of my biggest shames in life.
'Tis with our Judgements as our Watches, none / Go just alike, yet each believes his own.
Torte de Lini
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Germany38463 Posts
June 07 2011 15:09 GMT
#29
On June 07 2011 15:05 Probulous wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 07 2011 15:00 Torte de Lini wrote:+ Show Spoiler +

I, too, sir, have traveled to that very land. A place where females thrive on stereotyping men as "walking aroused dicks" and gasp at the very site of any animal with fur and exaggerated size of eyes.

[image loading]

Voici un exemple


It was many years ago and the more I think back the more it pains me to relive such a torture. I figured it'd be a delightful film, a movie revolving around trivial matters and with a moral dart to truly sucker those who are gullible to their own emotions. True, I was being dragged along equally to see it, I kept my head held high and knew I was better than all these women of various shapes, sizes (yet pretentiously capable of rejecting my stares and luring gestures with my hands).

I didn't know what the movie was called, but the young dame who has shackled me to this 2 hour dawn of torment told me a woman named "Rachel McAdams' was in it. My eyebrows frowned with curiosity. Rachel McAdams? I flipped through my achronological memories to see if I can recall who she was. She must have been the leader of this cult of females who dare to perpetuate wild notions of love like: Some boy will be "The One" or the better: "We were meant to be together, it was destiny"!

On my side, I felt my date coil up around me, her legs bent and her face making an imprint on my sleeve. No matter what, I couldn't leave and I gripped the arms of my chair and held my breath as the opening credits started...

In cursive letters, the title waltzed on screen.

The Notebook


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3G3fILPQAU


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Not The Notebook! Anything but this. I hastily darted my eyes towards the nearest exit! I need to get out of here! I've heard horrors of this movie: An arrogant southerner, portrayed as a simpleton with simple needs and simple desires, falls in love with a female who comes from narrow-minded rich family. Somehow, contrasting lifestyles makes their love an intertwining contradiction of disapproval and hormonal sexual passion.

I tried to slip out, unravel myself like a cobra, but my date only clenched hard and my body receded all physical feeling. My mind became clouded as the movie pressed on, it tumbled through emotions I tried so hard to suppress with my testosterone. I stave the movie off with its creeping need to moist my eyes with questions of trivial logic: Why are they kissing in the rain? Why is he being such an annoying prick? Oh my God, just kiss already!

Wait, what? That wasn't a question. My ball and chain of breasts and revealing clothes has already lost the battle and my sleeve soon became a tissue. Damn her, I will not succumb to this film! NEVER! Back, back you fiendish ghoul of human-like sentiments! I said back!

The final scene rolled: the elderly man reading to the female. This cheap knock-off of Romeo and Juliet was nearly over and I will have survived when the final clincher bellowed from the main character's words...

Oh God...

The lights rolled forward and I shut my eyes hard before a tissue painted below the socket: "There there" she said: "guess the movie really hit home for you, eh?"

Fuck... she was right. I nodded and clamped my hands with her's. It truly did, I realized, as I jumped in our pick-up truck back to Alabama.

It truly did...


That is truly touching...

I prefer Disney movies if I want to cry, Lion King for the win. But each to their own. I guess you didn't have a choice.

BTW I would never have picked you as a pickup driver.

Don't know why, but there you go.


It's frictional.
https://twitter.com/#!/TorteDeLini (@TorteDeLini)
imjorman
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States580 Posts
June 07 2011 15:40 GMT
#30
On June 07 2011 14:52 intrigue wrote:
hold on. let's hear more about the future fiancee part.


Well...we're dating obviously, but like due to financial situation, we're delaying our engagement and marriage. In addition, we wouldn't be getting married until after college anyway, so getting married while she's still a sophomore (I"'ll be a junior in the fall) would be kind of ridiculous and pointless anyway.

tl;dr we're getting married just taking our time with it.
People who want power shouldn't have it.
RaLakedaimon
Profile Joined August 2010
United States1564 Posts
June 07 2011 15:51 GMT
#31
On June 07 2011 13:26 Chairman Ray wrote:
I've done worse. I DLed and watched Twilight before I knew how bad it was. I was like WTF IS THIS, then found out about all the Twilight hate. I understood why.


You have definitely broken every rule that I set for myself by watching that movie, you sir should be ashamed. To the op I gotta say man nothing wrong with watching some random chick flick on the week that pops into theaters, I've done that plenty with gf's and usually enjoyed them. I admit I wont watch Bridesmaids but if I was dating some chick who really wanted to well, I guess I'd just have to lol.
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