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Active: 2437 users

I Caught my Sister Smoking - Page 5

Blogs > Hakker
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funnybananaman
Profile Joined April 2009
United States830 Posts
March 28 2011 22:00 GMT
#81
Definitely don't tell your parents that would be a huge dick move. If you're really concerned about it talk to her. Although remember just because your dad has had horrible problems with smoking doesn't necessarily mean she will, there is a big difference between being a pack a day smoker for your whole life and doing it in moderation/once in a while. It would be a good idea to find out how much your sister smokes maybe?
Sinborn
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States275 Posts
March 28 2011 23:07 GMT
#82
Is your sister hot? It might explain why she's smoking.

Okay, I had to get that out of my system.

In any case, it depends on how well you can manage drama as a family unit. On one hand, smoking is a money-sink-vice that may kill you and appears to have a growing stigma following it. Beyond the health effects, non-smokers will likely deem her lacking character trait that may cost a job or maybe a friend. A friend told me that he quit smoking because all his food tasted like crap after a while. Overall, smoking has its couple upsides, but the long term really tends to be both expensive and frustrating.

On the other, it is a choice, regardless of how much you are told that smoking is the product of big corporate brain-washing. Smoking, in a weird way, functions like a lesser form of self-immolation, which may be perceived as noble by certain circles. The act itself is an active step towards removing oneself from one category of people and into another one that your sister may simply want to step towards. I say this because even if you throw the book of facts at her, it will likely not sway her opinion because smoking represents that very personal departure.

I believe that the greatest show of loyalty to a family unit is to see past what is immediately uncomfortable and try to change things for the better. It's one of those things that seems like a good idea at first, but ends up sucking after quality of life becomes the primary focus. I'd do what I can to stop her from smoking, but don't over-extend. I'd have a talk or two, but I suspect that smoking will become self-evident to your parents from the smell or finding a pack somewhere. I don't know how 'dire' it is to notify given those properties.
Swede
Profile Joined June 2010
New Zealand853 Posts
March 29 2011 01:58 GMT
#83
If she already understands all the risks then all you can do is kindly say what you think and then leave it. Like Sinborn says above, smoking may be being used as a step from one group to another, or as a representation of some personal belief.

It's also important not to assume the worst of what she is doing. Not everyone gets addicted and not everyone smokes a pack a week or more (I have smoked for over a year now but am not addicted, I regularly take weeks off with no cravings or withdrawal symptoms). Telling her smoking will kill her etc when she is smoking a cigarette a week will only make her angry and less likely to listen.

To summarise, be as understanding as humanly possible while letting her know what you think. No good can come from lecturing her on the facts or telling her it's a disgusting habit. Avoid inadvertent guilt trips too.
IamBach
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States1059 Posts
March 29 2011 02:02 GMT
#84
On March 29 2011 07:00 funnybananaman wrote:
Definitely don't tell your parents that would be a huge dick move.

Yeah it would be such a dick move to try to intervene before she develops a dangerous, life threatening habit. Why don't you just think about whats best for her? Thats really what this is about right?
Just listen http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__lCZeePG48
Swede
Profile Joined June 2010
New Zealand853 Posts
March 29 2011 02:17 GMT
#85
On March 29 2011 11:02 etheovermind wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 29 2011 07:00 funnybananaman wrote:
Definitely don't tell your parents that would be a huge dick move.

Yeah it would be such a dick move to try to intervene before she develops a dangerous, life threatening habit. Why don't you just think about whats best for her? Thats really what this is about right?


It's only what's best for her if she shares your values. Surviving for as long as possible isn't on the top of everyone's list. Thinking like that is exactly what you shouldn't do if you want her to listen.
Ilikestarcraft
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Korea (South)17733 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-03-29 03:54:45
March 29 2011 03:52 GMT
#86
Just don't buy her any lighter or packs if she asks which I don't think you will. Confront her and just tell her if she's going to smoke underage she should do a much better job of hiding it if she doesn't want your parents finding out. There is nothing else you can do besides that. Telling her not to smoke isn't gonna do much good. Telling your parents is just gonna make her hate you.
"Nana is a goddess. Or at very least, Nana is my goddess." - KazeHydra
Chairman Ray
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
United States11903 Posts
March 29 2011 03:56 GMT
#87
Every time she grabs a smoke, throw a banana at her. Keep doing this for a few weeks, and eventually, she will not smoke for the fear of being hit by a banana.
FragKrag
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
United States11556 Posts
March 29 2011 03:59 GMT
#88
I know what you should get her for her birthday

http://www.electroniccigarettes.com/
*TL CJ Entusman #40* "like scissors does anything to paper except MAKE IT MORE NUMEROUS" -paper
jayna_kuklin
Profile Joined December 2015
1 Post
December 26 2015 08:43 GMT
#89
Well, ever since my older sister came home from college, all she's ever done was smoke in my room a few nights per week. And it's getting kinda annoying to hear her lighter click and her blow on her bong while I'm trying to sleep.

However, she's 19 and I'm 17. I know that she's an adult and she can do whatever the fuck she wants, but seriously. I've contemplated on telling my parents about the situation but I couldn't stand to see how pissed off they would be at her for not telling them and at me for waiting to tell them about it.

Trust me, my mom smokes cigarettes and I've tried all that I ever could do to get her to quit, but now that my sister's into vaping and getting high on weed, it's gotten a little bothersome to even see this when I'm supposed to be asleep.


Any ideas?
Chef
Profile Blog Joined August 2005
10810 Posts
December 26 2015 18:11 GMT
#90
Hey jayna,

If you click My Blog in the upper left corner of the page, you will see a prominent 'new blog' link where you can write about this. It's a little confusing to bump this thread, even though the topic is related.

If you want to discourage her from doing that, all you can do is think about what motivates her and manipulate things that way If you likes you, you can be cold and unfriendly to her and tell her that's why. If there's no particularly close relationship, you can just tell her its gross and stinks, and then give up because probably she's smoking to relieve stress / fit in with her peers, and that's a pretty big motivation to be up against.

If the only problem is she does it in your room, just kick her out. Also it's unlikely your parents don't have any idea, unless they have lost their sense of smell.

I think people get into long drawn out grievances when they have a problem with other people's behaviour, and sometimes the healthiest thing to do is let it go until you can move yourself out of a bad situation. You sometimes have to accept your opinion doesn't always motivate another person.
LEGEND!! LEGEND!!
fluidrone
Profile Blog Joined January 2015
France1478 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-12-26 20:53:54
December 26 2015 20:05 GMT
#91
Hi, don't mind me, here's my quick fix:

Just simply tell her the truth:

human beings develop through 16 to 26 + .. so if she smokes during then .. she might be deformed ("compared" to a healthier version of herself).
Now I do realize that seems harsh.. but go look it up (make HER look it up with you).. it is not in the slightest.
She could have hips differ to "her genetic perfection", leg width/lengh disproportionate to torso etc etc than it would be without nicotine consumption during those years. Of course her s xual apparatus can also be deteriorated by this .. but thats not as poignant for her as her looks should be (at that age).
(ps then again it is like the russian roulette, if she was going to be "deformed" (as in not the perfect she wants!) maybe smocking would change her and make her look sexy and hip .. point is nobody knows).

(also totally unrelated, sorry to mention, but i hate your id choice, dear op.. hax bad juju)
"not enough rights"
Djzapz
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Canada10681 Posts
December 26 2015 21:50 GMT
#92
For those who can't tell, this thread was made in March 2011.
"My incompetence with power tools had been increasing exponentially over the course of 20 years spent inhaling experimental oven cleaners"
BeStFAN
Profile Blog Joined April 2015
483 Posts
December 26 2015 23:35 GMT
#93
On December 26 2015 17:43 jayna_kuklin wrote:
Well, ever since my older sister came home from college, all she's ever done was smoke in my room a few nights per week. And it's getting kinda annoying to hear her lighter click and her blow on her bong while I'm trying to sleep.

However, she's 19 and I'm 17. I know that she's an adult and she can do whatever the fuck she wants, but seriously. I've contemplated on telling my parents about the situation but I couldn't stand to see how pissed off they would be at her for not telling them and at me for waiting to tell them about it.

Trust me, my mom smokes cigarettes and I've tried all that I ever could do to get her to quit, but now that my sister's into vaping and getting high on weed, it's gotten a little bothersome to even see this when I'm supposed to be asleep.


Any ideas?


i would like to see a discussion in a seperate blog too. i think many user on teamliquid would love to share their thoughts
❤ BeSt... ༼ つ ◕_◕༽つ #YEAROFKOMA #YEAROFKOMA #YEAROFKOMA ༼ つ ◕_◕༽つ
fluidrone
Profile Blog Joined January 2015
France1478 Posts
December 27 2015 01:10 GMT
#94
On December 27 2015 06:50 Djzapz wrote:
For those who can't tell, this thread was made in March 2011.

Funny how you seem to disavow any further use of this thread, sort of negating the very purpose of threads.
:/
"not enough rights"
Djzapz
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Canada10681 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-12-27 04:21:57
December 27 2015 04:17 GMT
#95
On December 27 2015 10:10 fluidrone wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 27 2015 06:50 Djzapz wrote:
For those who can't tell, this thread was made in March 2011.

Funny how you seem to disavow any further use of this thread, sort of negating the very purpose of threads.
:/

That's absurd and you know it, and you're being disingenuous. This is a thread that was made for a very specific purpose, this guy and his sister, over 4 years ago. A discussion took place, no doubt some of it was tangential which is fine, then it died and it was brought back largely by mistake by someone who stumbled on TL on google and made an account for something.

A thread with no posts for 4 years is no longer relevant, and if you want to discuss the same topic you're fully in your right to make a new thread without dredging up a story from half a decade ago, which undoubtedly people will click, not notice the date it was posted on and answer OP.

So no, "disavowing" the use of necroed threads does not negate the "very purpose of threads" (what the hell). Threads aren't necessarily timeless. They hold a specific conversation, then they die. In some cases they can be brought back. In others, like this one, they're better left to the archives IMO. But none of this has nothing to do with threads. Threads can be short lived. They can have 0 posts on them. They can last a few weeks, or years.

A good way to know if a thread can be reused should be to look at its title. If it's general, then fine. If it's specific to a situation involving real people, you should make your own. It's basic forum etiquette. Very basic forum etiquette. The bump was very obviously an honest mistake though which is why Chef tried to helped explain how the forum works. I think if anyone is interested in discussing this topic or a specific situation which is similar, they should make a new thread instead of building on an old story.
"My incompetence with power tools had been increasing exponentially over the course of 20 years spent inhaling experimental oven cleaners"
fluidrone
Profile Blog Joined January 2015
France1478 Posts
December 27 2015 12:21 GMT
#96
Much wow.. grazed a nerve did I?
"That's absurd and you know it, and you're being disingenuous. "
Much wow again.. in need of a hug?

Threads are bottled messages sent across an ocean of disbelief and cold shoulders.

The necroing does not apply at all if the poster is unaware of the fact that this thread has not been posted in for "x" time, no?

Necroing means you did it with purpose knowingly, no?

My postting? Well.. I thought about the original post (and its subsequent adendum) and I felt kinship with the issue.. evidently not with the poster.

My!!!!!
My!!!!! Should I buy a vowel?
Am I so much out of tune with what a forum is that I am useless?

To answer that .. read my post.. .. its content is not reflected anywhere in the thread (not to mention that this is a grave issue (kids growing up smoking)) .. its content is potent and timeless.

So.. "absurd".. that would be your opinion. I feel that smokers have it hard and I wish to help.. do you not think this avenue (someone "necroing" (your word, not mine) this thread) is a bad one?

Nevermind, you are right.. there was no point, no aim, no goal from my part. I was just wasting our time.

"A thread with no posts for 4 years is no longer relevant".. enough said lets agree to disagree and have a happy new year <3
"not enough rights"
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32130 Posts
December 28 2015 04:26 GMT
#97
hey jayna

the gestapo also wanted you to rat our your neighbors. i bet they'd also encourage you to bump five year old threads if they could.

George Washington wouldn't pull any of that bullshit.
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
Disregard
Profile Blog Joined March 2007
China10252 Posts
December 28 2015 07:23 GMT
#98
I guess cigarettes must be cheaper where you live because sure as hell can't sustain smoking as a teenage here in NYC.
"If I had to take a drug in order to be free, I'm screwed. Freedom exists in the mind, otherwise it doesn't exist."
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