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Active: 2051 users

[IA] - BoxeR to be given a bye to Code S Finals

Blogs > Hoju
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Hoju
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States449 Posts
December 27 2010 23:02 GMT
#1
[image loading]

SlayerSBoxeR to be given a bye to the Code S Finals

Earlier today, GomTV elaborated on the newly released plans for Code S. Many fans who tried to pointlessly figure out the system noticed that SlayerSBoxeR did not appear to have any challenges or games in his path. GomTV confirmed in a statement that BoxeR has been given a bye to the Code S Finals.

[image loading]
Pictured is SlayerSBoxeR, who also goes by his nickname Lim Jo Hawn or Lim Yo Han Solo or Jimbo Kahn or something like that

GomTV explained in their statement that they had tried to help BoxeR previously, but felt he needed more assistance this time:

      ”In GSL 2 and 3, we made sure he qualified and even set up his opponents for him, but he sucked and didn't go all the way. Since he's honorable or some shit, he refused our direct help. You see how far that got him? Barely made Code S on his own. Pathetic. This time, we're not taking any chances and making sure he gets to the finals and not letting his “honor” get in the way.”

GomTV even elaborated on how they fixed the brackets for him in GSL 2 and 3:

      ”In GSL 2, we had it all set up. We even made sure he played and beat NaDa for uber ratings and money for us. However, we didn't realize how dreadful his TvZ was until his showmatch with that Fruity guy at Blizzcon. By that time, there were like eleventy billion Zergs on the other side of the bracket and even we couldn't fix that. In GSL 3, we made sure he faced no Zergs and had his path all lined up. We had some drunk foreign Terran named after a soju brand, a Protoss who hadn't heard of the Extended Thermal Lance upgrade, a Protoss with stupid glasses and known for choking, and a Terran player who had to apologize to the community for being so bad. But, of course, like a moron, he loses to some scrub named Polt. Needless to say, we were fucking pissed.”

The admission of match fixing has gone largely unnoticed by the community who are more angry at Polt and NesTea for denying them a BoxeR GSL win. Distinguished TeamLiquid community member, ShitPuncher69, had this to say about GomTV's statement, “I am fucking excited to see BoxeR in the finals, it's the way it should be anyways. He's teh bestest in the world and those stupid players in previous GSL's, didn't realize it and should have let him win. Let's see them try to stop him now!11!one!1!” The rest of the community agreed, saying that they also have massive hard-ons for BoxeR.

GomTV also considered fixing the whole tournament, but according to their statement they “want to maintain the integrity of GomTV and ensure a fair tournament for everyone.”


+ Show Spoiler [Editor's note] +
A little busy this week, and the next one might take awhile, so I hope to have it up next Sunday or Monday. It should be pretty good Stay Tuned!


****
www.TheInfestedArchon.com - SC2 Satire
unit
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
United States2621 Posts
December 27 2010 23:07 GMT
#2
BoXeR doesnt need help he will succeed on his own, sooner or later he will have a SC2 equivalent of yellow to be his punching bag granted...yellow did turn the tides recently in games against BoXeR back in BW
Zoler
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Sweden6339 Posts
December 27 2010 23:09 GMT
#3
Funny funny... haha.

Never make fun of the emperor again
Lim Yo Hwan forever!
Z3kk
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
4099 Posts
December 27 2010 23:10 GMT
#4
Hahahahaha I JUST realized that this is a joke article.

(after looking at the banner, then looking at the banner of the "subway map" )

Pretty clever.
Failure is not falling down over and over again. Failure is refusing to get back up.
jaymik
Profile Joined November 2009
Korea (South)425 Posts
December 27 2010 23:12 GMT
#5
"Since he's honorable or some shit"

hahahahahaha. Enjoyed the blog mate.
jaymik kr/na
Stenstyren
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Sweden619 Posts
December 27 2010 23:12 GMT
#6
I was frowning until GomTV talked about GSL 1&2. Then I lol'ed. In RL.
c.Deadly
Profile Joined March 2010
United States545 Posts
December 27 2010 23:13 GMT
#7
BoxeR will destroy everybody in 2011!
rebdomine
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
6040 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-12-27 23:16:20
December 27 2010 23:15 GMT
#8
rofl, more awesome shit.

I like how you basically dissed Jinro, MC, choya, and Rain.

I know it's all in jest though. Jinro and MC are cool.
"Just because you are correct doesn't mean you are right!"
synapse
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
China13814 Posts
December 27 2010 23:18 GMT
#9
Hahaha 5/5! That Fruity guy!
:)
HollowLord
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States3862 Posts
December 27 2010 23:19 GMT
#10
I love the Infested Archon
dota 2 stream #noskill #feed #noob twitch.tv/dmcredgrave
1Eris1
Profile Joined September 2010
United States5797 Posts
December 27 2010 23:21 GMT
#11
rofl this is amazing.
Known Aliases: Tyragon, Valeric ~MSL Forever, SKT is truly the Superior KT!
darmousseh
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States3437 Posts
December 27 2010 23:37 GMT
#12
awesomeness at it's most awesome level.
Developer for http://mtgfiddle.com
Jefferino
Profile Joined May 2010
United States69 Posts
December 27 2010 23:44 GMT
#13
Hahah laughed IRL, 5 stars
Wolf
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Korea (South)3290 Posts
December 27 2010 23:54 GMT
#14
Even better than the first one. Haha.
Commentatorhttp://twitter.com/proxywolf
TL+ Member
hazelynut
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
United States2196 Posts
December 28 2010 00:15 GMT
#15
I kinda miss the charts

good job! a little over the top, but yaaay boxer i can say no ill of anything with boxer in it.
Zerg | life of lively to live to life of full life thx to shield battery | www.cstarleague.com <3
jlim
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Spain943 Posts
December 28 2010 00:15 GMT
#16
I LOVED this.
FalconPunchsc2
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
Canada91 Posts
December 28 2010 00:20 GMT
#17
I knew they rigged this.
Born to B
404.Delirium
Profile Joined May 2008
United States1190 Posts
December 28 2010 00:32 GMT
#18
These articles are so fun =p I didn't realize this was an IA until the first statement "quote". The caption on the picture definitely confused me though until I realized it was an IA
seriously next disrespectful comment in this blog is ip ban. Be happy or get the hell out. // SC2 is like playing with neutral-colored Play-Doh while BW is like colorful Legos.
paper
Profile Blog Joined September 2004
13196 Posts
December 28 2010 00:59 GMT
#19
These are great, but can you make them not so obvious? The random swearing and lack of... "professionalism" really kills it for me. It's not a parody newspaper until someone gets legitimately angry at fake news :D
Hates Fun🤔
SK.Testie
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
Canada11084 Posts
December 28 2010 01:01 GMT
#20
srsly nigga
how the fuck u think it be like if we all posted like this bro?
shit could be so cash if you did it right
pce
Social Justice is a fools errand. May all the adherents at its church be thwarted. Of all the religions I have come across, it is by far the most detestable.
s.a.y
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
Croatia3840 Posts
December 28 2010 01:20 GMT
#21
made of awesome
I am not good with quotes
vileChAnCe
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Canada525 Posts
December 28 2010 01:34 GMT
#22
I hope Im not only one who was disappointed to realize you were joking about putting Boxer into the Finals :I
Day[9] i've broken 6 mice, 5 keyboards, 3 pairs of headphones, and a mousepad, all from raging after starcraft losing streaks
Zoler
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Sweden6339 Posts
December 28 2010 01:38 GMT
#23
On December 28 2010 10:01 MYM.Testie wrote:
srsly nigga
how the fuck u think it be like if we all posted like this bro?
shit could be so cash if you did it right
pce


lol wut
Lim Yo Hwan forever!
Diamond
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
United States10796 Posts
December 28 2010 01:40 GMT
#24
Epic. I lol'd so hard, good stuff! Keep them coming!
Ballistix Gaming Global Gaming/Esports Marketing Manager - twitter.com/esvdiamond
Char711
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
United States862 Posts
December 28 2010 01:53 GMT
#25
Haha, I always love these. Keep up the good work!

I loved the part about Jinro (we really need some drunk matches and a Combat-Ex-style Day[9] commentating) and ending it with "Needless to say, we were fucking pissed" was absolutely hilarious to me for some reason.

Of course, this surely adds some fuel to the whole Boxer conspiracy for the more . . . uh, interesting and intelligent . . . people on the forum. [sarcasm] I'm just so excited to hear more people's theories on that. [/sarcasm]
"If you can chill, chill." -Liquid`Tyler "Special tactics." -White-Ra
ReketSomething
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States6012 Posts
December 28 2010 02:23 GMT
#26
I like this one the most ^^. More mildly amusing than the other. lol
Jaedong :3
IntoTheEmo
Profile Joined February 2009
Singapore1170 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-12-28 02:51:06
December 28 2010 02:46 GMT
#27
Entertaining blog! It does highlight certain things though.

In one of threads suggesting the bracket fixing, some notable members of the community were also suspicious of it. Also, the way you portrayed random forum posters thinking Boxer getting special treatment = a good thing so well in that lol, it was rampant in those 20 or so pages.
http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=172934

Great blog, keep it up (unless they close it, then I'll remember it fondly)
MMOs kill APM. However Proleague plus BW Proscene music increase APM -> 100. 이제동 Fighting! Highest ranked Jaedong owner in FPL10 = clearly #1 Jaedong fan~! <- Keeping my sig from 2010
loving it
Profile Joined May 2010
Canada271 Posts
December 28 2010 03:20 GMT
#28
Parody news is AWESOME :D
It actually got me for a little while, atleast for the newcomers.
Stay gold.
Hoju
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States449 Posts
December 28 2010 07:49 GMT
#29
On December 28 2010 09:59 paper wrote:
These are great, but can you make them not so obvious? The random swearing and lack of... "professionalism" really kills it for me. It's not a parody newspaper until someone gets legitimately angry at fake news :D

Heh, I'm not trying to fool people, just trying to get a few laughs. I kinda like the blatantly over-the-top absurd style. As you might tell from the banner, I'm an Onion fan, so I draw some inspiration from their style. I may try being more subtle in the future, although apparently some people who hadn't previously read this blog were still fooled at the beginning. You're probably right about the swearing, though, so I'll likely tone it down a bit.


Thanks for the support, everyone. I'm glad it's not a total failure I got a few ideas banked up, and more ideas should come to me as the news and tournaments ramp up again after the new year.
www.TheInfestedArchon.com - SC2 Satire
darklordjac
Profile Joined July 2010
Canada2231 Posts
December 28 2010 08:06 GMT
#30
I lol'ed
Lumire
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States607 Posts
December 28 2010 09:43 GMT
#31
haha i love these, keep em coming.
|| o.o
Whole
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States6046 Posts
January 03 2011 08:13 GMT
#32
On December 28 2010 08:02 Hoju wrote:
Distinguished TeamLiquid community member, ShitPuncher69...


I laughed out loud at that part. The rest of it was awesome too, like all of your articles.

On December 28 2010 10:01 MYM.Testie wrote:
srsly nigga
how the fuck u think it be like if we all posted like this bro?
shit could be so cash if you did it right
pce


wat.
Waxangel
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
United States33606 Posts
January 03 2011 09:55 GMT
#33
On December 28 2010 09:59 paper wrote:
These are great, but can you make them not so obvious? The random swearing and lack of... "professionalism" really kills it for me. It's not a parody newspaper until someone gets legitimately angry at fake news :D


I disagree, being overtly ludicrous can make for hilarious fake news, like the people at theonion.com have shown for years
AdministratorHey HP can you redo everything youve ever done because i have a small complaint?
PaPoolee
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
Netherlands660 Posts
January 16 2011 19:24 GMT
#34
Wow this is epic, 5/5 keep em coming <3.
Meapak_Ziphh
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
United States6786 Posts
January 16 2011 21:43 GMT
#35
I <3 infested archon :D
Forti et Fideli ~ TL Mafia Forum: Come play with us! ~ Go Samsung KHAN, Stork, JangBi , Shine, Grape, and TurN Fighting!~ wat
Torenhire
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States11681 Posts
January 16 2011 22:01 GMT
#36
I read like, the first three lines.

Scrolled back up, and saw the banner.

Phew.... lol
SirJolt: Well maybe if you weren't so big and stupid, it wouldn't have hit you.
Xaga
Profile Joined June 2010
United States163 Posts
January 17 2011 03:15 GMT
#37
Oh man, these are hilarious. Definitely reminded me of The ONN, before I even read your post about it. Very good! Can't wait for the next one =)
Loser777
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
1931 Posts
January 17 2011 03:46 GMT
#38
The best part is the caption of the picture
6581
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