Me: undergrad computer science going on to masters but have volatile grades, crappy grades in year 2 but decent 1 and 3.
Worked the last two years as a tech support / sales dude for a company similar to newegg but more geared towards small businesses, government department and corporations. More sales than tech support but we do a bit of everything. I've saved enough money for post grad which I intend to use to improve on my crappy grades.
Reason for leaving the current job: Nazi and idiotic management. My old manager was chill and we really had a good team atmosphere, performance was good, pay was okay, and it was a really good place to work your 9-5 until the parent company sent some clown CEO who got his big break running super markets.
Took away commissions, took away our dealing rights, a bunch of good people left taking our clients away and some tight ass decisions means that my department only have 6 clients on accounts instead of 120 that we used to have.
Anyway that's enough bitching, my old manager moved on after falling out with his bosses. I absolutely despise the new guy who replaced him. Let's just say his personality matches the dream of our supermarket CEO.
So this is what I have come up with so far:
Dear Sir / Madam
I am writing to express my interest in your advertisement for an Application Support position.
I have completed an undergraduate degree in computer science at Monash University. My education introduced a strong curiosity and appreciation for softwares. I have also taken opportunities to work on a few freelance projects and my resume will elaborate further on that matter.
I have demonstrated strong communication skills during my current employment which requires me to interact with small business clients on a daily basis.
My resume contains additional details regarding my background and I would welcome an opportunity to discuss them with you.
I Look forward to hearing from you.
Regards
Haduken
Yeah, it's crap. My biggest weakness is that I do not have a good foundation in English writing (I immigrated during middle school and missed out on a lot of stuff) so my grammar will be a little off. The new company that I'm applying for sells and maintains software for legal firms so I'm assuming that nothing except the perfect English will pass them.
However, I'm confident that my language skill will be more than sufficient should I get the job.
Be brutal, I don't mind if you call me shit or whatever and completely dismiss my attempt so far. I would appreciated it if you do.
Fantastic opportunity to learn and start your career Great team atmosphere Excellent working environment Here’s your chance to use your strong problem solving, client facing and technical skills alongside other members of our experienced Support Team who look after our client base in Australia and New Zealand.
As part of our succession and growth plans we’re very keen to add a highly capable and enthusiastic person to our Melbourne operations.
Our latest product releases with its new functionality and technology underpinning it means that this is an ideal time to be growing your software and client facing skills. You’ll be actively involved in learning and growing your skills by working very closely alongside other members of the Support team to solve a wide range of software issues that our clients face.
You’ll be providing product and technical support to our customers, answering complex questions on business process, function and use of our products. You’ll be expected to analyse issues, research and identify solutions then manage the process and work closely with the client through to resolution.
We expect that you’ll have recently completed an appropriate tertiary qualification and be looking for your first opportunity to get into a serious software and client facing role. Given the nature of the role, it goes without saying that you’ll have outstanding written and verbal communication skills. You’ll have a real interest in software and be very proactive solving problems and using your initiative.
We work in a very team centric environment – so we’re expecting an unusually high level of general communication and relating skills so that you work effectively with your peers and clients.
This is a fantastic opportunity for the right person to start and grow a career within the software industry. If you’d like to know more about us, visit www.aderant.com.
There are a few points that I didn't address, for example the point on problem solving and analytical skill. I have no idea on how to answer that, working in I.T and playing starcraft is not going to cut it!
Give an example in your previous job or other work experience where your problem solving and analytical skills came in handy. I like the STAR acronym, where you explain the Situation, Tasks you were given, Actions you took, and Results. Works in an interview and I'm sure it can help your cover letter too.
Thx, I know STAR but I didn't want to write some thing so long in a cover letter which is really just an email body. I'm more inclined to use STAR when I get the interview.
u should really spice it up a little, show ur interest more, make ur letter stand out among the others.
Dear Sir, Madam, or Transgendered Individual
I am writing harder than anyone has ever written before. I broke 3 keyboards I am so extremely interested in your advertisement for an Application Support position. When I read this advertisement I had to take a break for 3 days I was so excited.
I have completed an undergraduate degree in computer science at Monash University. In a way, this degree is unique to anyone in the field. In another, more accurate way, this degree is the same as the other 10,000 undergraduates who graduated this year. But I am better than them. I'm smarter. Stronger. Sexier. I guarantee you.
My education introduced a strong, unhealthy obsession with softwares. I can't stop thinking about them much like an obese person thinks about food. I have also taken opportunities to work on a few ridiculously badass freelance projects and my resume will elaborate further on these matters because I would not be able to contain that level of awesome in only my cover letter.
Look at this letter. Now look at your computer. Now back at this letter. You can't code like me, but you can hire someone that codes like me. Also, I have demonstrated unprecedented communication skills in this letter and during my employment. I had to interact with small business clients on a daily basis. Every. Day. Have you ever met small business clients? You need to communicate the shit out of them.
My resume contains additional details regarding my background and I would welcome an opportunity to discuss them with you over a game of StarCraft: Brood War, the Blizzard real time strategy game that sold 11 million copies and is widely considered the best game ever in its genre and spawned a sequel called StarCraft II: Wings of Liberty, which is set to release July 27.
I look forward to hearing from you. I look so forward to this that I will cut myself once in the arm for every day I do not get a response.
I am writing harder than anyone has ever written before. I broke 3 keyboards I am so extremely interested in your advertisement for an Application Support position. When I read this advertisement I had to take a break for 3 days I was so excited.
I have completed an undergraduate degree in computer science at Monash University. In a way, this degree is unique to anyone in the field. In another, more accurate way, this degree is the same as the other 10,000 undergraduates who graduated this year. But I am better than them. I'm smarter. Stronger. Sexier. I guarantee you.
My education introduced a strong, unhealthy obsession with softwares. I can't stop thinking about them much like an obese person thinks about food. I have also taken opportunities to work on a few ridiculously badass freelance projects and my resume will elaborate further on these matters because I would not be able to contain that level of awesome in only my cover letter.
Look at this letter. Now look at your computer. Now back at this letter. You can't code like me, but you can hire someone that codes like me. Also, I have demonstrated unprecedented communication skills in this letter and during my employment. I had to interact with small business clients on a daily basis. Every. Day. Have you ever met small business clients? You need to communicate the shit out of them.
My resume contains additional details regarding my background and I would welcome an opportunity to discuss them with you over a game of StarCraft: Brood War, the Blizzard real time strategy game that sold 11 million copies and is widely considered the best game ever in its genre and spawned a sequel called StarCraft II: Wings of Liberty, which is set to release July 27.
I look forward to hearing from you. I look so forward to this that I will cut myself once in the arm for every day I do not get a response.
REGARDS!!! Sir Haduken P. Australia III
oh my god T_T someone needs to create a statue in your honor for ever post you make
I am writing harder than anyone has ever written before. I broke 3 keyboards I am so extremely interested in your advertisement for an Application Support position. When I read this advertisement I had to take a break for 3 days I was so excited.
I have completed an undergraduate degree in computer science at Monash University. In a way, this degree is unique to anyone in the field. In another, more accurate way, this degree is the same as the other 10,000 undergraduates who graduated this year. But I am better than them. I'm smarter. Stronger. Sexier. I guarantee you.
My education introduced a strong, unhealthy obsession with softwares. I can't stop thinking about them much like an obese person thinks about food. I have also taken opportunities to work on a few ridiculously badass freelance projects and my resume will elaborate further on these matters because I would not be able to contain that level of awesome in only my cover letter.
Look at this letter. Now look at your computer. Now back at this letter. You can't code like me, but you can hire someone that codes like me. Also, I have demonstrated unprecedented communication skills in this letter and during my employment. I had to interact with small business clients on a daily basis. Every. Day. Have you ever met small business clients? You need to communicate the shit out of them.
My resume contains additional details regarding my background and I would welcome an opportunity to discuss them with you over a game of StarCraft: Brood War, the Blizzard real time strategy game that sold 11 million copies and is widely considered the best game ever in its genre and spawned a sequel called StarCraft II: Wings of Liberty, which is set to release July 27.
I look forward to hearing from you. I look so forward to this that I will cut myself once in the arm for every day I do not get a response.
REGARDS!!! Sir Haduken P. Australia III
Hahahahaha, no wonder there's a baller fanclub, whilst I'm not a fan yet, this is one step closer to being one.
I am writing harder than anyone has ever written before. I broke 3 keyboards I am so extremely interested in your advertisement for an Application Support position. When I read this advertisement I had to take a break for 3 days I was so excited.
I have completed an undergraduate degree in computer science at Monash University. In a way, this degree is unique to anyone in the field. In another, more accurate way, this degree is the same as the other 10,000 undergraduates who graduated this year. But I am better than them. I'm smarter. Stronger. Sexier. I guarantee you.
My education introduced a strong, unhealthy obsession with softwares. I can't stop thinking about them much like an obese person thinks about food. I have also taken opportunities to work on a few ridiculously badass freelance projects and my resume will elaborate further on these matters because I would not be able to contain that level of awesome in only my cover letter.
Look at this letter. Now look at your computer. Now back at this letter. You can't code like me, but you can hire someone that codes like me. Also, I have demonstrated unprecedented communication skills in this letter and during my employment. I had to interact with small business clients on a daily basis. Every. Day. Have you ever met small business clients? You need to communicate the shit out of them.
My resume contains additional details regarding my background and I would welcome an opportunity to discuss them with you over a game of StarCraft: Brood War, the Blizzard real time strategy game that sold 11 million copies and is widely considered the best game ever in its genre and spawned a sequel called StarCraft II: Wings of Liberty, which is set to release July 27.
I look forward to hearing from you. I look so forward to this that I will cut myself once in the arm for every day I do not get a response.
I am writing harder than anyone has ever written before. I broke 3 keyboards I am so extremely interested in your advertisement for an Application Support position. When I read this advertisement I had to take a break for 3 days I was so excited.
I have completed an undergraduate degree in computer science at Monash University. In a way, this degree is unique to anyone in the field. In another, more accurate way, this degree is the same as the other 10,000 undergraduates who graduated this year. But I am better than them. I'm smarter. Stronger. Sexier. I guarantee you.
My education introduced a strong, unhealthy obsession with softwares. I can't stop thinking about them much like an obese person thinks about food. I have also taken opportunities to work on a few ridiculously badass freelance projects and my resume will elaborate further on these matters because I would not be able to contain that level of awesome in only my cover letter.
Look at this letter. Now look at your computer. Now back at this letter. You can't code like me, but you can hire someone that codes like me. Also, I have demonstrated unprecedented communication skills in this letter and during my employment. I had to interact with small business clients on a daily basis. Every. Day. Have you ever met small business clients? You need to communicate the shit out of them.
My resume contains additional details regarding my background and I would welcome an opportunity to discuss them with you over a game of StarCraft: Brood War, the Blizzard real time strategy game that sold 11 million copies and is widely considered the best game ever in its genre and spawned a sequel called StarCraft II: Wings of Liberty, which is set to release July 27.
I look forward to hearing from you. I look so forward to this that I will cut myself once in the arm for every day I do not get a response.
Doesn't Monash have an employment department or something similar? Where you can take your resume, cover letter, etc to be checked?
After reading the job description, you might want to elaborate a little on written and verbal communication and where you may have demonstrated them. For example, you've demonstrated excellent writing skills through uni assignments/thesis/etc. Something like that. You might also want to add something about developed telephone manner through your previous job if this new job requires you to talk to clients over the phone.
I'd also suggest you adding you have interpersonal skills and work great in a team (once again you'll need to demonstrate where, like uni projects) since the job advert says team centric environment. My 2 cents
Talk about why you want to work for them, instead of/in addition to why you qualify for the job. Why does working as an "application support for legal practice softwares" excite you (make up some random bullshit if it's just a job to you). Your cover letter sounds pretty generic, and I can see it being used for various positions, and employers can usually tell. Make yours more unique, more tailored towards the specific company that you are applying for. Through your cover letter, demonstrate that you really read the job description carefully; make it seem like you thought about applying before clicking the send button (this is most easily done by elaborating on the keywords in the posting, such as "team", "communication", etc.)
Generally speaking, employers don't really care about cover letter, but it could prevent you from getting an interview if it's poorly written or too generic. When I was applying for jobs, my rule was to not write a cover letter unless the posting specifically demanded one.
Monash employment consulting is the most useless thing on the planet, actually most of the faculty staff are useless. I have very little faith in anyone that's not a teaching academic after they royally screw me twice on my scheduling.
On July 23 2010 21:44 Cambium wrote: Talk about why you want to work for them, instead of/in addition to why you qualify for the job. Why does working as an "application support for legal practice softwares" excite you (make up some random bullshit if it's just a job to you). Your cover letter sounds pretty generic, and I can see it being used for various positions, and employers can usually tell. Make yours more unique, more tailored towards the specific company that you are applying for. Through your cover letter, demonstrate that you really read the job description carefully; make it seem like you thought about applying before clicking the send button (this is most easily done by elaborating on the keywords in the posting, such as "team", "communication", etc.)
Generally speaking, employers don't really care about cover letter, but it could prevent you from getting an interview if it's poorly written or too generic. When I was applying for jobs, my rule was to not write a cover letter unless the posting specifically demanded one.
Awesome advice. That's the sort of thing I was looking for.
I am writing to express my interest in your advertisement for an Application Support position.
My passion is in developing software and I would like to see myself as someone who can work on projects as complex as the ones that aderant is involved in. I believe this position will give me the opportunity and nurturing to make that happen.
I have completed an undergraduate degree in computer science at Monash University. My education introduced a strong curiosity and appreciation for software development profession. I have also taken opportunities to work on a few freelance projects and my resume will elaborate further on that matter. I believe these experiences will allow me to become a success in your organisation.
I currently work for ........ who supplies computer hardwares to small businesses and organisations across the nation. I work in a small team of 10 members and I have benefited from the great chemistry and knowledge that the group has offered me. In such a small group, we rely very much on each other's communication and cooperation to get the job done.
My role involves consulting with clients in person, via phone and emails. My duties involves receiving and understanding inquires from clients and provide adequate solutions. To provide the right solution, I must understand the client's need and the cause of his problem and with this understanding, I would go on to research and plan the solution. It's in this process that I would use my problem solving and attention to details skills.
My resume contains additional details regarding my background and I would welcome an opportunity to discuss them with you.
you need to tell them why you are fit for THEIR company specifically. Make sure it doesnt sound like a copy and paste cover letter cuz they will throw it out. Do company research, but it in your resume. Resaerch the role, what they want, then give exampels that makes you a good fit.
I have worked for the law dept. of a few Fortune 100 companies. I don't think anyone payed attention to the cover letter unless it was to determine where to route the resume.
I would keep the letter concise. You will not win a job with the letter, but you can blow one. Describe how you found out about the job, why you would like to work for the company, and very briefly, your skills.
Your resume is attached. If they wonder, make them call you.
I took a small hack at what you wrote:
I write regarding your advertisement for an Application Support position.
My passion is in developing and supporting software. I would like to work on projects and solutions as complex as the ones Aderant provides.
I have an undergraduate degree in Computer Science from Monash University. My education enhanced my curiosity and appreciation for the software development profession. I have also worked on freelance projects. I believe these experiences allow me to become a success in your organisation.
My resume contains additional details regarding my background. I welcome an opportunity to discuss them with you.
On July 24 2010 01:54 TaaiJoeng wrote: Lol this is quite funny because I just finished my Civics and Careers course so I know how to do all this stuff. xD
Edit: This course is mandatory only in Ontario I think :0
On July 24 2010 01:54 TaaiJoeng wrote: Lol this is quite funny because I just finished my Civics and Careers course so I know how to do all this stuff. xD
Edit: This course is mandatory only in Ontario I think :0
....Fuck....quoted by accident....
that course is totally useless because by the time you have something to put in your resume/cover letter, you'd've most definitely forgotten what was taught.
you gotta really put yourself in the shoes of the guy that hires you. Baller's letter would work better then most of other letters in this thread. Because if you write what your write the only impression is "oh another pretentious cover letter feeding me bullshit." Basically what Cambium says is right. You have to dig deep, look up company's history on google, use information that isnt easily accessible. It will still come off as bullshit, but it makes you look hardworking.
I my own experience hiring people, I never read the cover letter until after the resume gets filtered into the 'to call' pile when I am making a list of specific questions to ask. So my advice is have some specific, interesting, applicable experience in the cover letter itself addressing the job posting. Show you can talk about what you've done and tell me why you fit in meaningful, relevant, complete sentences - not just resume bullet points.
I do tell the office assistant to throw out any cover letters/resumes that have misspellings, grammatical errors, silly fonts or formatting, or weird file types. If you can't get stuff like that right I have no time for you, and a lot of employers operate this way. If you advertise a job these days you get slammed with resumes and have a lot to filter through. Be careful not to let any silly stuff sabotage your chances.
I am writing harder than anyone has ever written before. I broke 3 keyboards I am so extremely interested in your advertisement for an Application Support position. When I read this advertisement I had to take a break for 3 days I was so excited.
I have completed an undergraduate degree in computer science at Monash University. In a way, this degree is unique to anyone in the field. In another, more accurate way, this degree is the same as the other 10,000 undergraduates who graduated this year. But I am better than them. I'm smarter. Stronger. Sexier. I guarantee you.
My education introduced a strong, unhealthy obsession with softwares. I can't stop thinking about them much like an obese person thinks about food. I have also taken opportunities to work on a few ridiculously badass freelance projects and my resume will elaborate further on these matters because I would not be able to contain that level of awesome in only my cover letter.
Look at this letter. Now look at your computer. Now back at this letter. You can't code like me, but you can hire someone that codes like me. Also, I have demonstrated unprecedented communication skills in this letter and during my employment. I had to interact with small business clients on a daily basis. Every. Day. Have you ever met small business clients? You need to communicate the shit out of them.
My resume contains additional details regarding my background and I would welcome an opportunity to discuss them with you over a game of StarCraft: Brood War, the Blizzard real time strategy game that sold 11 million copies and is widely considered the best game ever in its genre and spawned a sequel called StarCraft II: Wings of Liberty, which is set to release July 27.
I look forward to hearing from you. I look so forward to this that I will cut myself once in the arm for every day I do not get a response.
REGARDS!!! Sir Haduken P. Australia III
This was amazing. Do you charge? I'll hire you when I need my cover letter written, for sure.
On July 24 2010 09:27 Kingsp4de20 wrote: Make sure you personalize it and dont put sir/madam. It looks like you just ran off 50 copies and are handing them out everywhere.
What would you write? Since I don't know that much about the company and all I really have is a submit button on a job site.
On July 24 2010 09:27 Kingsp4de20 wrote: Make sure you personalize it and dont put sir/madam. It looks like you just ran off 50 copies and are handing them out everywhere.
What would you write? Since I don't know that much about the company and all I really have is a submit button on a job site.
No that's fine. Just write something specific about the company/job like I said earlier. Keep it short and error free. That's about it. The shortened version posted earlier by someone else isn't bad, just need some details added in.
Don't overthink it, the cover letter could, but rarely breaks your opportunities (assuming you cared enough). What they'll focus on is your resume.
edit: To me, you seem to care quite a bit about this job, put some of that passion into one or two sentences. Wanting something is often half of the battle (read my sig )
edit2: To corroborate on what I said before, I think your energy is better spent fixing your resume. Tailor your resume to match the job description closely (you have no idea how many companies still do a keyword search on the resume, and this filters out more than half of the applicants), describe the more relevant experiences in more detail, and remove some of the irrelevant ones (they are more or less distractions and take up precious spaces).
My resume is more or less geared towards a grad developer role (Which is ultimately what I am trying to get :/) but this position is obviously not a developer role.
This role however is with a well established software house and they did ask for tertiary qualification so I have my doubt if all they after is another hell desk monkey. I'm feeling that this support position is a step towards something else so what would you advise?
My resume is more or less geared towards a grad developer role (Which is ultimately what I am trying to get :/) but this position is obviously not a developer role.
This role however is with a well established software house and they did ask for tertiary qualification so I have my doubt if all they after is another hell desk monkey. I'm feeling that this support position is a step towards something else so what would you advise?
By keyword search, I mean whether your resume mentions some of the things they are looking for. In your case, it might be something like "support", "customer relations", "resolving conflicts", etc.
I mean, most new grads work their way up, so taking a support job in a software firm is definitely a step towards the right direction. It's also always easier to switch once you have your feet in their door.
Obviously, if you can get a proper dev job, that'd be great, but don't be discouraged with this opportunity.
I'm not discouraged and I realized that scoring a straight dev grad is probably a little too ambitious with my credentials. Australia don't have a huge industry like in the US and we kinda have an over supply of grads in this field and I'm being squeezed by competition.
I am writing harder than anyone has ever written before. I broke 3 keyboards I am so extremely interested in your advertisement for an Application Support position. When I read this advertisement I had to take a break for 3 days I was so excited.
I have completed an undergraduate degree in computer science at Monash University. In a way, this degree is unique to anyone in the field. In another, more accurate way, this degree is the same as the other 10,000 undergraduates who graduated this year. But I am better than them. I'm smarter. Stronger. Sexier. I guarantee you.
My education introduced a strong, unhealthy obsession with softwares. I can't stop thinking about them much like an obese person thinks about food. I have also taken opportunities to work on a few ridiculously badass freelance projects and my resume will elaborate further on these matters because I would not be able to contain that level of awesome in only my cover letter.
Look at this letter. Now look at your computer. Now back at this letter. You can't code like me, but you can hire someone that codes like me. Also, I have demonstrated unprecedented communication skills in this letter and during my employment. I had to interact with small business clients on a daily basis. Every. Day. Have you ever met small business clients? You need to communicate the shit out of them.
My resume contains additional details regarding my background and I would welcome an opportunity to discuss them with you over a game of StarCraft: Brood War, the Blizzard real time strategy game that sold 11 million copies and is widely considered the best game ever in its genre and spawned a sequel called StarCraft II: Wings of Liberty, which is set to release July 27.
I look forward to hearing from you. I look so forward to this that I will cut myself once in the arm for every day I do not get a response.
REGARDS!!! Sir Haduken P. Australia III
A profound way to articulate a coverletter. I would undoubtedly give a job offer, at 4 times the salary without even having an interview after reading this cover letter.
EPT
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