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A Starcraft horror story

Blogs > SpicyCrab
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SpicyCrab
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
402 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-06-19 04:22:34
June 19 2010 04:21 GMT
#1
You wake up on July 27th and get ready to play Starcraft 2 for the first time in quite a while.

You sit down at your computer

*click*

You scramble to find where the sound came from

"don't bother, turn around and you're dead."

You pause, frozen in place.

"My name is johnathan fitz, and I have a challenge for you. If you do not accept this challenge I will kill you right now. Do you accept the challenge"

"how can I accept the challenge if I don't know what it -"

"Shut the fuck up bitch; do you accept my challenge or not?"

"... yes, I accept your challenge"

"Boot up starcraft 2"

So you comply...

He continues "press the find a match button"

So you comply...

"I am going to watch you play this game, if you win, I will slip out your window and you will never hear from or see me again."

You pause, beads of sweat trailing from your forehead, "and if I lose"

"If you lose I am going to shoot you in the head. Your death is quite likely."
______________________________________________________________

How would you play that game of starcraft 2? Would you cheese? Would you rush, would you go for a macro game; what race would you choose? How would you play Starcraft 2 if your life depended on it.

**
I'm such a baller in my dreams. - HiFriend
EleanorRIgby
Profile Joined March 2008
Canada3923 Posts
June 19 2010 04:24 GMT
#2
??
savior did nothing wrong
n.DieJokes
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States3443 Posts
June 19 2010 04:29 GMT
#3
On June 19 2010 13:21 SpicyCrab wrote:
"Shut the fuck up bitch; do you accept my challenge or not?"

I liked it until this line. I imagined a sort of cool, calm and calculated killer; the excessive profanity comes across as trashy to me. Also Sc2 is >.<; it doesn't really have the depth that broodwar has and that would make this question interesting. Regardless, I'd probably baneling bust for the cheap easy win
MyLove + Your Love= Supa Love
Pengu1n
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
United States552 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-06-19 04:31:50
June 19 2010 04:31 GMT
#4
I would rush void rays and press A into my opponents base and thank blizzard for the matchmaking system that matched me up with a bronze player
SpicyCrab
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
402 Posts
June 19 2010 04:31 GMT
#5
Haha maybe I will write a real sc2 horror story soon then.
I'm such a baller in my dreams. - HiFriend
Tempest[OEC]
Profile Joined February 2010
United States417 Posts
June 19 2010 04:31 GMT
#6
6 pool. Nothing but.
Polar_Nada
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
United States1548 Posts
June 19 2010 04:36 GMT
#7
LOL proxy FTW.
[ReD]NaDa and fnaticMSI.SEn fighting~! ::POlar @ UC Irvine::
rockon1215
Profile Joined May 2009
United States612 Posts
June 19 2010 04:38 GMT
#8
7-pool obviously
Flash v Jaedong The finals that is ALWAYS meant to be
HeyitsClay
Profile Joined April 2008
Canada336 Posts
June 19 2010 04:38 GMT
#9
i would hope i didnt just win my 3 last games and play standard and get an easy win X_X
zoltanqc
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Canada171 Posts
June 19 2010 04:42 GMT
#10
I just go pewpew...
AND THEN, THE INTERNETS EXPLODED.
gaizka
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
United States991 Posts
June 19 2010 04:47 GMT
#11
This story is so bad XD
I hope theres a second part :D

To answer, I would just play my normal game.
endy
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Switzerland8970 Posts
June 19 2010 05:00 GMT
#12
White-Ra has joined the game.
FML.
ॐ
banana
Profile Joined January 2009
Netherlands1189 Posts
June 19 2010 05:06 GMT
#13
This could have been a great story, something tells me you've watched saw too long ago, or are just fond of misplaced profanity that doesn't fit the character.

How would you play Starcraft 2 if your life depended on it.


Would depend on matchup/map, but probably some kind of cheese.
Z3kk
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
4099 Posts
June 19 2010 05:27 GMT
#14
Really (at everyone talking about the anticlimactic profanity)? I was going into the blog expecting nothing much at all >n<

I always, always make sure the door behind me is locked since my laptop is in the dining room; won't go into specifics, but the place I play is arranged so that once the door is locked, I can't possibly not notice an intruder (because I'm such a perfectionist, even minor paranoia must be taken care of...or something like that).

But to answer your question, I really would be screwed since I'm quite horrible. It depends on the map, but I would either cheese very hard (something I've never done so...); my game sense is nonexistent, so being a Protoss player, I would rush Void Rays or DTs or something of that ilk. ^^ V
Failure is not falling down over and over again. Failure is refusing to get back up.
luminaire
Profile Joined May 2010
United States56 Posts
June 19 2010 05:33 GMT
#15
I would probably go mech, because that's what i'm most comfortable with.
Work hard and never give up.
Nemesis
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Canada2568 Posts
June 19 2010 05:34 GMT
#16
I'll just join a 1v1 custom game against some bronze noob and play standard gg.
Lee Young Ho fighting! KT P are just CHINTOSSTIC.
firebound12
Profile Joined March 2010
Canada274 Posts
June 19 2010 05:34 GMT
#17
On June 19 2010 14:00 endy wrote:
White-Ra has joined the game.
FML.


LOL

6pool is always the best option.
SonuvBob
Profile Blog Joined October 2006
Aiur21550 Posts
June 19 2010 05:38 GMT
#18
I'd Combat-EX it obviously.

"No seriously man, I REALLY need this win."
Administrator
mOnion
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
United States5657 Posts
June 19 2010 05:41 GMT
#19
On June 19 2010 14:38 SonuvBob wrote:
I'd Combat-EX it obviously.

"No seriously man, I REALLY need this win."


hahahahaha
☆★☆ 7486!!! Join the Ban mOnion Anti-Trolling Initiative! - Caller | "on a scale of machine to 10, how bad is that Zerg?" - LZgamer | you are the new tl.net bonjwa monion, congrats - Rekrul | "Cheeseburgers dynamite lilacs" - Chill
flamewheel
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
FREEAGLELAND26782 Posts
June 19 2010 05:46 GMT
#20
On June 19 2010 14:38 SonuvBob wrote:
I'd Combat-EX it obviously.

"No seriously man, I REALLY need this win."

This man wins.
Writerdamn, i was two days from retirement
Pandain
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States12989 Posts
June 19 2010 06:10 GMT
#21
5 seconds in id realize that my mouse is dead. From then on i'll just beg the person im playing to quit because a crazy sc2-psycopath is going to kill me.
DrivE
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States2554 Posts
June 19 2010 06:16 GMT
#22
I would say goodbye to all my facebook friends
LUCK IS NO EXCUSE
Corrupt
Profile Joined August 2009
Bulgaria1312 Posts
June 19 2010 06:22 GMT
#23
I'll pinch my cheek, wake up, then go write on TL.net about that horrific dream I had last night, where a female Hot_Bid dressed up like Johnathan Fitz, forced me to play that awful new game called StarCraft 2.
Just a guy trying to enjoy living in the worst timeline and failing miserably since 1990.
matjlav
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Germany2435 Posts
June 19 2010 06:35 GMT
#24
On June 19 2010 14:38 SonuvBob wrote:
I'd Combat-EX it obviously.

"No seriously man, I REALLY need this win."


This comment just won the thread.

And lol at the sudden profanity. The story went from sounding like an action thriller to sounding like a gay domination fantasy with that line

To address the OP, I would probably do an all-in strategy that wasn't a strict early game cheese.
SpicyCrab
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
402 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-06-19 07:24:59
June 19 2010 06:51 GMT
#25
Haha, so much hate for my profanity. Look every one, the guy is freaking crazy okay? What do you expect him to say.

If any thing I take it as a complement though, people wouldn't be so upset if they weren't interested in the first place.

Don't worry every one, you will get a real starcraft 2 thriller sometime in the near future.
I'm such a baller in my dreams. - HiFriend
Angra
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
United States2652 Posts
June 19 2010 07:17 GMT
#26
I was gonna say I'd just rush void rays


But honestly if I were actually in the situation I'd probably pick terran and play standard because I'd be most comfortable with it.
Sentenal
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
United States12398 Posts
June 19 2010 07:30 GMT
#27
On June 19 2010 14:38 SonuvBob wrote:
I'd Combat-EX it obviously.

"No seriously man, I REALLY need this win."

haha, best answer in this entire thread
"Apparently, Sentenal is a paragon of friendship and tolerance. " - Ech0ne
SpicyCrab
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
402 Posts
June 19 2010 07:43 GMT
#28
I don't understand the combat-ex joke :/
I'm such a baller in my dreams. - HiFriend
sYz-Adrenaline
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States1850 Posts
June 19 2010 07:46 GMT
#29
I would go Combat-ex

aww someone already beat me to it
Can you feel the rush?
Dead9
Profile Blog Joined February 2008
United States4725 Posts
June 19 2010 09:03 GMT
#30
On June 19 2010 16:43 SpicyCrab wrote:
I don't understand the combat-ex joke :/

http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=68545&currentpage=52
http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=68545&currentpage=54
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