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Uncle Google interview

Blogs > Vekzel
Post a Reply
1 2 Next All
Vekzel
Profile Blog Joined September 2009
Poland142 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-10-18 15:23:17
October 18 2009 14:56 GMT
#1
[image loading]


Hello TL.

I decided to spend my 100th post for something bigger, so here it is: my interview with this world's Overmind. I asked Uncle Google how much he has to say about Starcraft and anything that is connected with this game: players, teams, prominent figures, organizations and leagues. Of course, as we might 've expected, he was very talkative, though I had to hold him off a bit and steer the conversation to the point. Uncle was in friendly mood, so he even shown me some interesting pictures despite his crazy tendency to confuse terms and change topics. Unfortunately, he is a bit deaf, so we had some trouble along the way. Since I was smart enough to record this conversation, I posted it below. I edited our chat a bit just to make it sound sensible. However, I kept all hillarious 'qui-pro-quos' just for your fun. Enjoy!

PS: Disambiguation sucks.

PART 1
Interview with Overmind Uncle Google:

Vekzel: Uncle Google, have you ever heard about StarCraft?
Uncle Google: You n00b, my name is Google, I heard about everything! Look:

+ Show Spoiler +

[image loading]



V: OK Uncle, calm down, I only wanted...
G: Ha! (Z)Calm, I heard about him too, I'm even indexing topic about his Hatcheries!

+ Show Spoiler +

[image loading]


[image loading]



V: Huh? What's this?
G: Ugh, sorry, my bad. I thought it's about him, really...
V: Nevermind. Uncle, we have a lot of trouble with Zerg nowadays...
G: Nothing new, nerds have always been annoying.
V: No, not nerds, I said Zerg!
G: Oh, Zerg! OK, what about them?
V: We want some new solutions how to stop them.
G: Know your enemy, I say. Ask uncle, I say. Look:

+ Show Spoiler +

[image loading]



V: Fine, what's your point?
G: zerg rush: 55 100 results; zerg tactics: 54 100 results.
G: You stop Zerg rush - you win. You don't - you lose.

+ Show Spoiler +

[image loading]

Uncle is only D on ICCup, what could I expect? But... Germany?



V: Uncle, tell me then what Protoss should do to combat Zerg?
G: Hmmm... Emmm... Nah, you got me, this is the only question I have no answer for.
V: Uncle Google, don't piss me off! Or I will go ask uncle Wolphram.

+ Show Spoiler +

[image loading]

Bluffing, haha, I already did. Of no avail.



G: Okay, okay. I think... They should hire some professional company to help them.
V: A company? What company?
G: This one:

+ Show Spoiler +

[image loading]


[image loading]

Protoss Ltd. In Poland!



V: Yeah, I see. NVM, tell me all you know about Starcraft
V: (Gets flooded by numbers of stories, contents and other crap: See part 2, 3 & 4).
V: Uh, oh, heh... Thank you uncle. That was very... helpful.
G: It's been a pleasure.
V: Two last questions. Your favourite map?

+ Show Spoiler +

[image loading]



V: Your favourite strategy?

+ Show Spoiler +

[image loading]



V: Thank you Uncle, and... see you soon!
G: See ya! Don't be evil!

PART 2
What Uncle said:

And here are the details of uncle's looong lecture.
(All content below was extracted from Google Suggestion tool. I put exact phrases in brackets).

1) ProGamers:

+ Show Spoiler +

1. (T)NaDa 39 500 000 (red nada)
2. (T)BoxeR 366 000 (slayers boxer)
3. (Z)sAviOr 350 000 (savior gm)
4. (T)IdrA 260 000 (idra starcraft)
5. (Z)Ret 204 000 (tot ret)
6. (Z)Jaedong 137 000 (jaedong)
7. (T)Canata 133 000 (canata)
8. (T)ToSsGirL 67 300 (tossgirl)
9. (Z)GoRush 57 900 (gorush)
10. (P)Nal_rA 54 300 (nal_ra)
11. (T)iloveoov 51 000 (iloveoov)
12. (T)firebathero 41 000 (firebathero
13. (P)Bisu 38 900 (bisu shield)
14. (Z)July 30 200 (july zerg)
15. (T)Raven 30 100 (esc.raven)
16. (Z)YellOw[ArnC] 27 200 (yellow arnc)


2) Some Other People:

+ Show Spoiler +

jon 747 - 5 100 000
fakesteve - 464 000
klazart - 35 300
rekrul poker - 4 200


3) Units:

+ Show Spoiler +

dark templar 1 210 000
high templar 765 000
zergling 266 000
panda bear guy 246 000
hydralisk 148 000
lurker starcraft 97 300
archon starcraft 91 400
ultralisk 89 600
mutalisk 88 500
terran science vessel 72 000
defiler starcraft 42 700
terran valkyrie 20 300
terran goliath 19 900


4) TeamLiquid vs KeSPA:

+ Show Spoiler +

team liquid 20 000 000
kespa 191 000


PART 3:
Uncle's Photos:

+ Show Spoiler +


(T)Canata

[image loading]


(T)fantasy

[image loading]

1st Result: WTF?


(T)HiyA

[image loading]


(P)Kal

[image loading]


(Z)Luxury

[image loading]



PART 4:
Ever watched Pro-(P)Movie?

+ Show Spoiler +

(T)Bogus

[image loading]


(Z)hero

[image loading]


(P)PerfectMan

[image loading]


(Z)sAviOr

[image loading]


(T)sKyHigh

[image loading]


(P)Tempest

[image loading]




LAST BUT NOT LEAST
Very first result of typing 'lilsusie' in Google graphics:
+ Show Spoiler +

[image loading]



****
#1 Stork Fan II RET FIGHTING!!! II Nal_rA, Calm, UpMaGiC: GL 2U! II sAviOr: recover PLZ!
DoctorHelvetica
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States15034 Posts
October 18 2009 15:07 GMT
#2
This was pretty funny, nice post 5/5
RIP Aaliyah
Herro_Korea
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
310 Posts
October 18 2009 15:19 GMT
#3
yep, I gave you 5/5, keep up the good work dude !

+ Show Spoiler +
LOL FANTASY
(-_(-_(-_-)_-)_-)
Musoeun
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
United States4324 Posts
October 18 2009 15:24 GMT
#4
The lilsusie pic is gold.

Entertaining interview.
Don't Shoot the Penguins. | Dance, 성은, dance! | Killer FanKlub | Action sucks. | Storm Terran hwaiting.
Strayline
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
United States330 Posts
October 18 2009 15:30 GMT
#5
Hmm... you type "Fantasy" into images.google.com and you get

[image loading]


type "Fantasy" into images.google.pl

and you get

[image loading]


wtf is up with you Poles?
Pengu1n
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
United States552 Posts
October 18 2009 15:33 GMT
#6
On October 19 2009 00:30 Strayline wrote:

type "Fantasy" into images.google.pl

and you get

[image loading]


wtf is up with you Poles?


damn! why did i have to scroll all the way down
Strayline
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
United States330 Posts
October 18 2009 15:37 GMT
#7
It's from the OP *shrug*
Herro_Korea
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
310 Posts
October 18 2009 15:45 GMT
#8
my 1st results are like in OP, yep
(-_(-_(-_-)_-)_-)
WhuazGoodJaggah
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Lesotho777 Posts
October 18 2009 15:54 GMT
#9
i like her rat tail
small dicks have great firepower
JWD
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
United States12607 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-10-18 15:56:39
October 18 2009 15:56 GMT
#10
[image loading]

hahaha

clever OP, 5/5!
✌
Cambium
Profile Blog Joined June 2004
United States16368 Posts
October 18 2009 15:57 GMT
#11
On October 19 2009 00:33 Pengu1n wrote:
Show nested quote +
On October 19 2009 00:30 Strayline wrote:

type "Fantasy" into images.google.pl

and you get

[image loading]


wtf is up with you Poles?


damn! why did i have to scroll all the way down


wow this is hot and disturbing at the same time
When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.
Chef
Profile Blog Joined August 2005
10810 Posts
October 18 2009 16:18 GMT
#12
HAHAHA! Nice! Nice! Good work OP.
LEGEND!! LEGEND!!
alffla
Profile Blog Joined November 2005
Hong Kong20321 Posts
October 18 2009 16:22 GMT
#13
ROFL that fantasy photo frmo polish google is ...wat

at...

rfol

nice pos thoguh hehe :D
Graphicssavior[gm] : What is a “yawn” rape ;; Masumune - It was the year of the pig for those fucking defilers. Chill - A clinic you say? okum: SC without Korean yelling is like porn without sex. konamix: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMY!
pangshai
Profile Blog Joined January 2005
Chinatown5333 Posts
October 18 2009 16:24 GMT
#14
lol 5/5. the picture of the chick was posted in the pics that make you laugh thread if i'm not wrong. i've seen it somewhere. T.T
#1 midas fan
Steelflight-Rx
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States1389 Posts
October 18 2009 16:44 GMT
#15
ahahahaha nice man!
yubee wrote: you know? it's a great night you should all smile no matter what harddships, because grass grows and the sky is blue and it's a good life.
BuGzlToOnl
Profile Blog Joined November 2006
United States5918 Posts
October 18 2009 16:58 GMT
#16
If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans.
Zona
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
40426 Posts
October 18 2009 17:21 GMT
#17
Cute blog.

A lot of the "# of results" are misleading though, as the words have other meanings
For example, something would be included in 'red nada' results if it mentioned nada and red on the same page - nada could mean 'nothing', and it's also an acronym for a several things.

Canata has a very different meaning - but I'm surprised, TLPD: Canata is the first result!

Any page with a guy named Jon and his hobby of watching jumbo jets...

But that 'fantasy' image search is...yikes.
"If you try responding to those absurd posts every day, you become more damaged. So I pay no attention to them at all." Jung Myung Hoon (aka Fantasy), as translated by Kimoleon
Sadir
Profile Blog Joined December 2005
Vatican City State1176 Posts
October 18 2009 18:34 GMT
#18
I thought it was really funny
Carnivorous Sheep
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
Baa?21245 Posts
October 18 2009 18:35 GMT
#19
5/5 lol.
TranslatorBaa!
skronch
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
United States2717 Posts
October 18 2009 20:27 GMT
#20
best 100th post ever? that was pretty entertaining
1 2 Next All
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