I am posting here because i am pretty desparate right now. Life for me has probably never been this low before. I am posting here cause I have seen some people post stuff like this on here and it seems they have some positive feed back so hopefully i will get some decent responses because every thing im about to discuss is 100% true from the bottum of my heart. Well my first problem not a major one but still brings me down thinking about it is work. about 2 years ago i started my own construction company (ambitious right?) well ever since i started things i have been struggling for money soo bad its not even funny. Every job i do 100% of the money i make goes to bills i haven't had a dollar to my name to purchase any thing for the past 2 years. It has sucked but i have been able to cope with it. Also my next major problem is a while ago i started hangin with the wrong people and got mixed up in drugs. I started using prescription pain killers and some times herion. I ended up getting hooked i guess. I am currently trying to stop but i have had a great deal of trouble stopping and trying to get off drugs is EXTREAMLY depressing especially that shit. on a side note my car doesn't work and my work van has a busted wind shild that i juat got pulled over for and if i don't get it fixed i get in trouble... ( i don't got the money). Now for the other worst part.. I discovered not to long ago that one of my supposed best friends has been seeing my girl friend behind my back. A girl i dated for 7 Years... I had plans to marry this girl...
I am so fucking bummed out i don't know what to do. Im 24 years old, broke, stuggling with drugs, just lost the person who i always went to when times were down. I don't know what the fuck im going to do... I didn't wanna make this too long cause people get bored reading other people problems. Ever since all this happened i have stoped playing starcraft, stopped working out, every thing has gone down the drain... I no longer have any motivation. im sure i probably have some spelling and grammar errors but im too fuckin bumed to read over this shit now. if ya could plz no " well i have it worse" stories. I know many other people have it worse but right now in my life i have reached an all time low and i don't think things could ever get any worse....
How do you have no money but then you say you are hooked on drugs? don't you need money for those drugs?
Problem solved there. Go to rehab.
About the girl, fuck her. "There are plenty of fish in the sea."
PS- part of a good rehab is no female 'friends' for the first year of recovery anyways. Because the bad beats and tilts that girls put on you leads to relapse.
On January 02 2009 21:47 CharlieMurphy wrote: How do you have no money but then you say you are hooked on drugs? don't you need money for those drugs?
Problem solved there. Go to rehab.
About the girl, fuck her. "There are plenty of fish in the sea."
PS- part of a good rehab is no female 'friends' for the first year of recovery anyways. Because the bad beats and tilts that girls put on you leads to relapse.
PPS- your life sounds better than mine, read my blog.
im on a treatment plan but its 75$ a doctor visit and 200$ a month for medication i don't have insurance
On January 02 2009 21:47 CharlieMurphy wrote: How do you have no money but then you say you are hooked on drugs? don't you need money for those drugs?
Problem solved there. Go to rehab.
About the girl, fuck her. "There are plenty of fish in the sea."
PS- part of a good rehab is no female 'friends' for the first year of recovery anyways. Because the bad beats and tilts that girls put on you leads to relapse.
PPS- your life sounds better than mine, read my blog.
im on a treatment plan but its 75$ a doctor visit and 200$ a month for medication i don't have insurance
There has to be a way for you to get help via government, it is in the best interest of them to do so. AA meetings are free if nothing else.
200 a month for medication? That's pretty expensive :s
DDx Major Depressive Episode//Bereavement Disorder.
Suggest: Commence SSRI therapy. Imovane/Quetiapine for sleep. Discontinue drug use - seek community drug support services if available. CATT (crisis team input) contact PRN. Seek social supports. Respite if available, co-ordinate with supports. Eliminate social/financial stressors as able, though this may not always be possible.
You picked a hell of a time to start a construction company (2006), and its not your fault that the housing market collapsed.
Money is the reason all this happened to you. Women always look for security (they don't actually care about you) and when you had to work 24/7 she thought less of you. Money is also probably the reason you got mixed up with drugs, to escape your problems.
The good news is that now you will have a chance to get rid of the dead weight in your life (that girl, and that friend), and now maybe you can start over with a clearer perspective on life, if you can make it through your current situation.
Just quit using the heroin, you can do it cold turkey it's not as hard as movies like trainspotting make it out to be. You'll be a little under the weather for 3 days or so, a little feverish maybe, but after that you should be just fine. The only difficult thing is finding enough motivation to quit, but if the heroin is costing you a lot of money and you don't have any, you should try to quit.
On January 02 2009 21:47 CharlieMurphy wrote: How do you have no money but then you say you are hooked on drugs? don't you need money for those drugs?
Problem solved there. Go to rehab.
About the girl, fuck her. "There are plenty of fish in the sea."
PS- part of a good rehab is no female 'friends' for the first year of recovery anyways. Because the bad beats and tilts that girls put on you leads to relapse.
Book yourself in a rehab center. The easiest way to reduce your depressive symptoms is a combination of antidepressants (Depending on how severe your depression is) and cognitive therapy. Even if you don't book yourself in a rehab center today, BUY BORROW or STEAL "Feeling Good" by Dr. Burns. You will learn how and why you feel hopeless, and how to stop feeling hopeless or helpless quickly, without resorting to drugs. It's a no nonsense, nonbullshit, nonhyped practical book. The techniques in the book are deceptively simple but they are supported by clinical evidence to work as well as drugs within a few weeks. So get that book today and read it, if you don't do anything else.
I wish that I could tell you that I had similar situations before, but mine were somewhat different. No drugs, but gf and work/money problems. The only thing that helped me out was knowing that I did have at least a couple of good friends there to support me. You need to find some support and stability, let go of the drugs and things will probably fall back into place. As for construction are you putting any bids in for government contracts for state agencies where you live? They will pay 200k for a new sidewalk out of stupidity....
well, you're not even close to hitting bottom, "Ryan," but if it helps motivate your rehab, go ahead and keep believing that you have. Depression has a funny way of making things seem worse than they are, killing motivation and ambition along the way. In starcraft terms, you might scout your opponent's build, and know how to react to it, but you'll refuse to react to it appropriately because you assume your opponent will just scout you and counter build what you're doing, so why even try...
You'll find yourself in a lot of catch 22s until you find a way to talk yourself out of that mode of thinking. Just don't tolerate it from yourself. Rehab will help with the drug addictions, for the depression, force yourself to recognize that everyday life doesn't have any hard-catch 22s and most problems have very simple solutions as long as you're willing to consider them. Good luck and stuff.
Hang in there man. Don't let the small problems scale up, they just seems worse then they are because of your situation. Focus on the big things, get off the drugs, make your stance regarding your girlfriend. That you have been struggling for money because of your company isn't your fault, be proud that you've managed to run your own company despite these times. In a few years the economy will go up again and we'll be fine. Stay strong, don't let them beat you .
I know that it sucks when all the problems seem to collapse on your head all at the same time. From what you've posted I'd say that you'll have to get a grip on your drug problem first. Doing heroin might make you feel good when you use it, but it will only make your situation worse; health and money-wise. You say that you've started some form of rehab, which shows that you have the will to change and that you took the first steps in the right direction. What you have to do now is stay strong and keep going on.
In terms of money; yeah it's tough at the moment, looking at the economical situation, but in the long run things will improve again. And you've lead a company for two years which proves that you are not stupid and able to organize so will be able to better your situation for sure. Hmm and the girl problem. It's always tough when you've been dating someone for such a long time and then have to find out that you've been cheated on. The person that is supposed to have your back and be your safety net... But like CharlieMurphy pointed out, there are plenty of fish in the sea. So don't give up.
i would try anti depressants before sitting around and thinking "god" is going to do something. Counseling and rehab can be good for someone like you as well.
As far as your financial situation, try to cut out things that you don't absolutely need for survival from your expenses (ie heroin), make a STRICT budget, and FORCE yourself to stick to it. I know it seems right now that you cant stop this downward spiral, but once you stop spending the money you cant spend, it'll start going upwards again-. I work for an engineering firm, and have been forced to act in a similar fashion lately with this slowing of the construction industry.
As for the drugs, I also recently quit drinking in November, due in part to the cost, and mainly the way it was destroying every aspect of my life. I drank 15-20 beers EVERY single night for probably the past year, and 12-15 a night the year before that. Although heroin is obviously a MUCH harder drug then alcohol, and it's potential damaging affects are far greater during usage, the withdrawal process is not as severe in symptoms, so once you start to clean up, you WILL actually feel better every day. A doctor will help you set up AA meetings and whatnot as well & probably put you on medication for the first 2 week period to get you through the worst phase. Once clean, the best thing for you to do, is to do things you enjoy, whether it be starcraft, just goin for walks, or excericising.... all these things will help you greatly through recovery... trust me...after 2 months I'm finally starting to feel more normal again. Essentially, go back to the basics of what you did prior to the situation you find yourself in currently. Do the things that used to provide happiness and excitement in your life all over again. And most importantly, talk to people close to you about how you're feeling, getting it out is probably the hardest aspect, but it'll be a real life saver.
As far as the women factor goes man.... you're 24 years old. There's always one waiting around the corner, as soon as you stop looking for them & focus on correcting your current lifestyle, a new one will pop up.
EPT
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