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I wrote a play! - Hadius the Lord of Nothing

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Deleted User 97295 1137 Posts October 16 2014 13:49 GMT #1 --- Nuked ---

ImbaTosS United Kingdom1666 Posts October 16 2014 15:11 GMT #2 Ahem... You spelt "Foreword" wrong...

Deleted User 97295 1137 Posts October 16 2014 15:13 GMT #3 --- Nuked ---

Deleted User 97295 1137 Posts October 16 2014 17:32 GMT #4 --- Nuked ---

aike United States1629 Posts October 16 2014 20:21 GMT #5 I'm only 13 pages in, but so far I don't really have much in the way of criticism. I think maybe the conversations could feel a bit more natural, the wording just feels a bit forced and unrealistic at times. The general idea so far seems decent enough though.

kushm4sta United States8878 Posts October 17 2014 00:01 GMT #6 Well your synopsis could certainly be better. I can't understand it at all. Does this play have a plot? What do you mean by "revere language"?

Deleted User 97295 1137 Posts October 17 2014 00:59 GMT #7 --- Nuked ---

Boonbag France3318 Posts October 17 2014 11:33 GMT #8 plot needs more batman

Capped United Kingdom7236 Posts October 17 2014 17:25 GMT #9 Well that officially makes no fucking sense to me. Perhaps im not cultured.

Deleted User 97295 1137 Posts October 17 2014 17:48 GMT #10 --- Nuked ---

Deleted User 97295 1137 Posts October 18 2014 18:19 GMT #11 --- Nuked ---

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