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How to pick a husband if you want kids

Blogs > Shady Sands
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Shady Sands
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
United States4021 Posts
January 11 2013 01:26 GMT
#1
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2013/01/07/how-to-pick-a-husband-if-you-want-to-have-kids/

How to find a husband who is a breadwinner. The first thing to be aware of is that everyone looks like a breadwinner in their twenties. Because most salaries are going up up up because there is nowhere to go but up when you start at entry level. And most people can get jobs pretty easily when their salary is not very high. But at some point, the salary gets high enough that you have to actually be good at what you do to continue getting jobs at that salary. Then some people start getting stuck and they have to rethink what they thought they could accomplish.

Other people simply cannot move up. They are as far up as they will go. This happens to most people around age 30. Definitely by 35. So the best thing to do is to assume anyone over 30 is making as much as they will make in their life. This is playing it safe, but better safe than sorry, right? (By age 40 almost no one’s salary increases.)


And there you go. Blunt advice on making love work. Get rich or die trying.

It's all about the money, at the end of the day. There are four options presented: the woman makes money, both make money (and your kids will hate you unless you shell out for a nanny), the man makes money, or you live in denial.

But nah, you're a big boy. You can take care of her. Because hey--you give, right? You're a giver, not a selfish good-for-nothing bastard. You're not a 窝囊废.

+ Show Spoiler [your role in society] +
[image loading]


That career you wanted as a screenwriter or painter or game designer? Scrap it, kiddo. Put on a suit, and bend over. And you gotta feel proud doing it or else they tag you for a lack of enthusiasm. And get good at it. Feel that rush as those numbers accumulate in your bank account and you use it to snag that undergrad who interned at your place last fall and fell asleep on your couch after a taking a ride home with you during a recruiting dinner.

Give for your kids. Give for your wife, for your parents. Wear yourself out on the treadmill, reach for that c-suite by calling out other people for the same bullshit you're guilty of, and enjoy the amazing feeling of watching other people spend your money on private school, salons, and Prada bags. Spend money on season tickets and a nice ride, try to feel young again. Get a mistress. Get a divorce. Pay alimony. Feel like a man doing it, because hey, that's what real men do. That's what your dad did when you were sixteen, right?

Get older, get worn out. Let those late nights and that toxic mix of 11pm takeout, expensed dinners, and all-night client networking hangovers catch up to you. Get cancer, heart disease, or maybe both if you're a real go getter and let go at age 61.

And at the end of the day, pick up that paintbrush or keyboard or football that used to give you so much joy, and weep. Weep, knowing that you taught your sons and daughters nothing but to keep playing the game as you played it. Weep, knowing that everyone you ever loved is about to fight tooth and nail with each other for whatever earthly legacy you have accumulated. Weep, knowing that the clock doesn't run backward and that the game... the game was rigged from the start.

Weep, knowing that good men have always wept for this earth, without really knowing why.

***
Что?
SOyuncastor
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Mexico40 Posts
January 11 2013 01:57 GMT
#2
I hate to log in. But you deserve it.
There is always someone younger and better than you.
ggggbabybabybaby
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
Canada304 Posts
January 11 2013 02:16 GMT
#3
Way to cherry pick a single point of the author's argument.

The subtitles listed BEFORE that one are called "Scenario 1: Be a Breadwinner [referring to the woman]" and "Breadwinner option 1: Marry a stay-at-home dad."

Also with the advent of the internet if you are the most passionate and/or the most talented in a field you often have the ability to make a living off of it.
Shiragaku
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Hong Kong4308 Posts
January 11 2013 02:28 GMT
#4
First thing I thought of when I read this was "Nice Guy"
G5
Profile Blog Joined August 2005
United States2898 Posts
January 11 2013 02:54 GMT
#5
2/5 for creativity and effort. Pretty bad advice though.
sc4k
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United Kingdom5454 Posts
January 11 2013 03:08 GMT
#6
Well written even if a little nihilistic. There are masses of people who live that exact way. I guess the goal is to get a fulfilling life but also get dem moneyz.
feanor1
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
United States1899 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-01-11 05:52:47
January 11 2013 03:13 GMT
#7
Serious question, why do you read this trash? Is that really who people turn to for advice on potential marriage partners, cause its terrible, life isn't that easy to break down into what your personality types are, and kids who have parents who work full time don't just hate their parents.


I am pretty sure you are approaching this as bad advice, but seriously why wasteyour time reading that crap.
Qwyn
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States2779 Posts
January 11 2013 03:34 GMT
#8
Very well written. There is a grain of truth there. Even though I detect a sarcasm overload.
"Think of the hysteria following the realization that they consciously consume babies and raise the dead people from their graves" - N0
docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
January 11 2013 04:29 GMT
#9
Not as good as I expected, but still not bad. Interesting point of view Shady.
User was warned for too many mimes.
munchmunch
Profile Joined October 2010
Canada789 Posts
January 11 2013 04:42 GMT
#10
On January 11 2013 10:26 Shady Sands wrote:Get older, get worn out. Let those late nights and that toxic mix of 11pm takeout, expensed dinners, and all-night client networking hangovers catch up to you. Get cancer, heart disease, or maybe both if you're a real go getter and let go at age 61.

And at the end of the day, pick up that paintbrush or keyboard or football that used to give you so much joy, and weep. Weep, knowing that you taught your sons and daughters nothing but to keep playing the game as you played it. Weep, knowing that everyone you ever loved is about to fight tooth and nail with each other for whatever earthly legacy you have accumulated. Weep, knowing that the clock doesn't run backward and that the game... the game was rigged from the start.
Speaking as someone in a high-personal-satisfaction, low-chance-of-renumeration field, I've got to say that getting old and worn out is pretty much unavoidable. And as you get older without any money or financial security, those self-doubts, missed opportunities, and regrets seem to pile up pretty fast as well.
jackstitties
Profile Joined April 2010
United States43 Posts
January 11 2013 04:45 GMT
#11
On January 11 2013 13:42 munchmunch wrote:
Show nested quote +
On January 11 2013 10:26 Shady Sands wrote:Get older, get worn out. Let those late nights and that toxic mix of 11pm takeout, expensed dinners, and all-night client networking hangovers catch up to you. Get cancer, heart disease, or maybe both if you're a real go getter and let go at age 61.

And at the end of the day, pick up that paintbrush or keyboard or football that used to give you so much joy, and weep. Weep, knowing that you taught your sons and daughters nothing but to keep playing the game as you played it. Weep, knowing that everyone you ever loved is about to fight tooth and nail with each other for whatever earthly legacy you have accumulated. Weep, knowing that the clock doesn't run backward and that the game... the game was rigged from the start.
Speaking as someone in a high-personal-satisfaction, low-chance-of-renumeration field, I've got to say that getting old and worn out is pretty much unavoidable. And as you get older without any money or financial security, those self-doubts, missed opportunities, and regrets seem to pile up pretty fast as well.


I'm not very far along in my current field, but as someone who is in a low personal satisfaction, high chance of remuneration field, I fear all the same things you fear. Even more so because my SO has the same drive and motivation.
hp.Shell
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States2527 Posts
January 11 2013 05:28 GMT
#12
I just skimmed a bunch of her stuff to see if I could find something that wasn't completely shallow.
"Blueprint for a Woman's Life"
1. Do less homework.
2. Get plastic surgery.
3. Go to business school right out of the gate.
4. Start early looking for a husband seriously.
5. Milk maternity leave for all it’s worth.
6. Guard your marriage obsessively. (Stay-at-home moms keep marriages together more effectively)
7. Practice austerity. (Austerity is not fun)
8. Do a startup with a guy.
9. If you can’t get men to do a startup with you, do a lifestyle business.
10. Homeschool. Your kids will be screwed if you don’t. (This is an advice tip she just realized this month and hasn't had enough time to mull it over)
11. Spend money on household help and Botox to keep more doors open longer. (So the more money to spend to get people to help you with your kids, the more time and energy you’ll have to help yourself. )
12. Break the mold in your 40s. (If you do nothing else, figure out how to have a lot of sex to leverage your hard-earned talent.)

WOW... So basically she's saying women should stay at home to be their husband's personal secretary and so their kids can be homeschooled, but then she's gonna pay someone else to teach them. In college, the woman shouldn't focus on her degree, but she should get a fake face and a fake chest. Then, the woman should go to business school so she can find a guy doing a startup (i.e. someone like Steve Jobs) Then she should have kids and milk maternity leave, and pay other people to do housework and raise her kids. Then get Botox and help yourself, oh and have a lot of sex to leverage your hard-earned sex-talents.

I can't believe people are taking advice from this person. This doesn't sound like someone who is trying to better herself. This sounds like a lazy person who spent her college money on a fake body which she then used to have the rest of her life paid for her by a rich guy.

I am so mad.
Please PM me with any songs you like that you think I haven't heard before!
Shady Sands
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
United States4021 Posts
January 11 2013 05:37 GMT
#13
On January 11 2013 14:28 hp.Shell wrote:
I just skimmed a bunch of her stuff to see if I could find something that wasn't completely shallow.
Show nested quote +
"Blueprint for a Woman's Life"
1. Do less homework.
2. Get plastic surgery.
3. Go to business school right out of the gate.
4. Start early looking for a husband seriously.
5. Milk maternity leave for all it’s worth.
6. Guard your marriage obsessively. (Stay-at-home moms keep marriages together more effectively)
7. Practice austerity. (Austerity is not fun)
8. Do a startup with a guy.
9. If you can’t get men to do a startup with you, do a lifestyle business.
10. Homeschool. Your kids will be screwed if you don’t. (This is an advice tip she just realized this month and hasn't had enough time to mull it over)
11. Spend money on household help and Botox to keep more doors open longer. (So the more money to spend to get people to help you with your kids, the more time and energy you’ll have to help yourself. )
12. Break the mold in your 40s. (If you do nothing else, figure out how to have a lot of sex to leverage your hard-earned talent.)

WOW... So basically she's saying women should stay at home to be their husband's personal secretary and so their kids can be homeschooled, but then she's gonna pay someone else to teach them. In college, the woman shouldn't focus on her degree, but she should get a fake face and a fake chest. Then, the woman should go to business school so she can find a guy doing a startup (i.e. someone like Steve Jobs) Then she should have kids and milk maternity leave, and pay other people to do housework and raise her kids. Then get Botox and help yourself, oh and have a lot of sex to leverage your hard-earned sex-talents.

I can't believe people are taking advice from this person. This doesn't sound like someone who is trying to better herself. This sounds like a lazy person who spent her college money on a fake body which she then used to have the rest of her life paid for her by a rich guy.

I am so mad.

You'd be surprised how many people are like her. And how many different languages these girls can speak T_T
Что?
Aerisky
Profile Blog Joined May 2012
United States12129 Posts
January 11 2013 05:47 GMT
#14
Oh wow, that lady's blog's advice/material is really depressing.

Interesting satiric/jaded take on this. :x
Jim while Johnny had had had had had had had; had had had had the better effect on the teacher.
Zahir
Profile Joined March 2012
United States947 Posts
January 11 2013 06:00 GMT
#15
Someone could write an equally satirical piece on "following your dreams" and how it ends with you a destitute loner who's given everything to his field and gotten nothing in return. You can be unhappy and miserable no matter what path you choose in life. Wealth doesn't automatically mean embracing its more dysfunctional trappings, any more sticking to that art or keyboard is an automatic formula for happiness.

What hurts in either case is not controlling your life, not taking responsibly for avoiding being saddled with a spoiled life partner. Things like that. Money only magnifies the bitter irony of quiet desperation. Has little to do with causing it.
What is best? To crush the Zerg, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of the Protoss.
Ximeng
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
China57 Posts
January 11 2013 06:20 GMT
#16
Shady writes a lot of interesting things and he is usually spot on.

But I am going to be honest here - even though you might not like it.

This woman's blog is spot on, no sarcasm. It is upsetting and certainly ugly but also quite sound. This is a lot like women's real politik. As a man reading it I am quite offended but I won't let that cloud my judgement. While not ideal, this blueprint is optimal.
I'm not Chinese but it would be okay if I were
FromShouri
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
United States862 Posts
January 11 2013 06:47 GMT
#17
On January 11 2013 15:20 Ximeng wrote:
Shady writes a lot of interesting things and he is usually spot on.

But I am going to be honest here - even though you might not like it.

This woman's blog is spot on, no sarcasm. It is upsetting and certainly ugly but also quite sound. This is a lot like women's real politik. As a man reading it I am quite offended but I won't let that cloud my judgement. While not ideal, this blueprint is optimal.


....really? because i showed this to my wife to get her opinion on it and she said that is the worst piece of garbage shes ever read and that it is a blue print to ruining your life. Pretty much 99% of the advice is ment for gold diggers and people who like to walk a fine line between corporate fraud and out right lying (it is best to milk maternity leave for as long as possible so you can get paid without doing your job, while the legal department is deciding whether to fire you or not, you can draw a paycheck the whole time. Its great to start up a business even if you don't have any intentions of creating revenue because you can draw a salary until the investors stop investing.)

Not to mention the straight gold digging advice, its best to attend business school early on and only after you've had face and chest plastic surgery.............

The blue print is far from optimal if you actually want to be considered, you know, a human being.
Limited Edition, lets do some simple addition, $50 for a T-Shirt is just some ignorant bitch shit.
domane
Profile Blog Joined September 2009
Canada1606 Posts
January 11 2013 07:09 GMT
#18
Forgoing children would be a lot simpler and carry less risks. Who knows if you'll be satisfied with your husband and little ones down the road.

Very interesting blog post. Thanks.
BigFan
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
TLADT24920 Posts
January 11 2013 08:00 GMT
#19
Interesting take on that women's blog. Money makes the world spin lol.
Former BW EiC"Watch Bakemonogatari or I will kill you." -Toad, April 18th, 2017
iKill
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
Denmark861 Posts
January 11 2013 08:13 GMT
#20
No, goddamnit. Fuck no. I won't.
thepuppyassassin: "My god... the deathball's grown wings!"
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