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On August 16 2012 17:26 Bswhunter wrote:Show nested quote +On August 16 2012 16:10 SnipedSoul wrote:
Most people are boring as fuck. Being alone alerts them to this fact and makes them uncomfortable.
I agree with your thoughts. Hahah + Show Spoiler +How do I become intresting? : (
By first being interested.
Then by communicating it.
What is being interesting ? It's usually about 2 things imo, having interesting stories or share an interesting subject.
Stories: There's no formula for that, and I would say its a virtuous circle. The more story you get, the more things will happen making even more story etc. But don't worry I strongly believe having an interesting story is the result of the second category.
Share an interesting subject: For that to happen, one must first be interested in a subject. Then if he has passion about it, it's just about being enthusiastic and communicating such passion. I also believe it's important to have multiple interests.
People are considered interesting when they have one of those two AND communicate on a level that is interesting for the receiver. For example, if you talk about Starcraft to your buddy that also play video games you will probably be very descriptive about it and talk about the little details that makes it great. If you talk about Starcraft to your mom or your gf, its way better to talk about aspects she can relate with like psychological requirement to get better, or share a good story as to how SC means for you.
For this last example, Day9 100th is a very good example as to how one becomes interesting to the receiver with a subject a priori boring to the receiver (Starcraft). And I believe there was a blog of a mom writing about this episode...
Of course you have never a guarantee to be interesting, it's just about improving the odds and being more social savy overall.
You will notice that I join OP with this. Someone that only purpose is to be with someone is boring. Why ? Because he/she is not interested in anything. But someone targeting his interests in multiple fields and not care about being alone, will become interesting as a result.
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On August 17 2012 03:23 Aelonius wrote:I am a loner myself in things I do, although I like to interact with people. It makes me apathic and self-centered. After all, who can you trust more to deliver what you want, than yourself? I struggle sometimes, going to watch this thread 
We all struggle at times, my friend. That's why we've got to fight the good fight and learn to love ourselves. I appreciate you liking the post! You should check out my blog at http://thehonestlifeblog.wordpress.com/ that's where I'll be posted all of my content first.
Thanks again!
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Very good read.
Being the single young bloke that I am, I can really relate to your story. I don't know why there's so much pressure from society, friends, family (and literally EVERYONE) to get a girlfriend (or a boyfriend if you're a girl, or if you're a guy who's into guys... You get the point) when being single is a terrific chance of getting to know and love the most important person in the whole world: YOURSELF.
Being single is absolutely fine! What's the problem with that!?
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Russian Federation748 Posts
I believe the concept of self-discovery's at its peak when one is trying to find their limit. There are many points of improvement within our lives that we value and enjoy tackling as a lone, self-governing individual. It's an empowering feeling to actually be able to measure your own calibre while also being true to yourself; amazing things can happen.
But when one finds that limit, when one's found the next step to truly be a question, is when they'll begin to seek a partner for support. That can be a painful or liberating moment, depending on the individual's strength of mind.
I think most people have failed to reap the benefits of being single, if they are so eager to seek another for comfort, or worse, identification.
That was an outstanding post.
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well, I'm not single, but I'm living alone. I love it the way it is, and I hope it'll stay like this for some time.
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how exactly do you love yourself in this way that you're describing? like do you mean noticing good things that you do or something like that. what kind of thoughts are in your head. i'm just asking because it sounds like a cool idea but i'm not sure where to start
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I tell people this all the time. Then they're "herp derp! Need someone!" A few months later they're hating the opposite gender...and I always wonder if a part of them just hates themselves and wants to feel unhappy...
Anyway, I've been single 5 whole years...and the personal growth I have done in that time is absolutely tremendous, to say the least.
On August 19 2012 19:30 Invigoration wrote:
how exactly do you love yourself in this way that you're describing? like do you mean noticing good things that you do or something like that. what kind of thoughts are in your head. i'm just asking because it sounds like a cool idea but i'm not sure where to start
It's like loving another person...except yourself. If you've ever been in love with someone else, you'll know what I mean. Just learn to find yourself interesting. There are things about you that you're like "...ewww...how could anyone like that?" ...well...learn to like them..learn to love them!
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I dont see why being in a relationship and loving yourself/personal growth have to be mutually exclusive. I never had a problem with being single but now I could never imagine not being with my current girlfriend. The idea of being with someone isnt so hard to let go of, instead it's the idea of not being with her. (which i think is how it should be for most people in relationships, otherwise someone's probably just arbitrarily filling a void)
I enjoyed being single while it lasted, but I was even more happy with how organically my current relationship manifested itself and I think that contributed largely to why I'm in such a good place right now (cause it if was forced in anyway I think that would have made it exceedingly difficult to have found the correct person). I have never grown so much in my life as I have in this last ~year and a half with my girlfriend. Like anything in life both sides have their benefits, why can't crazy society just let it be
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I love being alone, I can't stand to be around people.
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EPT
