EPT![[image loading]](http://www.teamliquid.net/staff/Kennigit/WeeklyRoundUp/WEEKLYROUNDUPBIG.png)
By Saracen
Day fourteen. It has only been two weeks, but it's felt like an eternity. Your hands are clammy, your breath is ragged and labored, your eyes are bloodshot. Your entire body trembles uncontrollably. You feel sweaty and nauseous; your head throbs something fierce. Your friends haven't seen you in ages. Worried, they call you up, ask you to see a doctor. You know better. You suffer from something no simple-minded medicinal hogwash or half-assed diagnosis can even scratch the surface of.
Beta withdrawal.
![[image loading]](/staff/Saracen/WeeklyRoundUp/Week51.jpg)
Yeah, it's something like that...
Yes, it's another uneventful week in beta(-less) land, and our amount of coverage is dwindling faster than our patience. So here's another well-informed and completely accurate round-up of the big time news.
![[image loading]](http://www.teamliquid.net/staff/Kennigit/WeeklyRoundUp/TOURNAMENTS.png)
Day[9] vs Tasteless BO7 Showmatch
"That's impossible!" you exclaim. Silly mortal, nothing is impossible for the man of the thousand kittens! No, your eyes don't deceive you. A show match between TL's favorite casters took place yesterday, LIVE. Or, almost live. This is a definite must-see for all the starstruck fangirls out there.
SoCal LAN 5
With a prize pool of $1500, this LAN is no small feat. And it has already attracted the biggest names in SC2. With nearly the entire EG team, as well as some big hitters from team Root, and our favorite little Otaku in attendance, their games being casted live by Diggity and Day[9], you may think this event couldn't get any better. Well, that's where you'd be wrong. Because Green Forest E-Cafe has provided actual progamer booths. So wipe off your pants and scrounge up some fifteen (or twenty five) bucks, because if you don't at least check this out, you can't legitimately call yourself a fan of E-Sports.
![[image loading]](/staff/Saracen/WeeklyRoundUp/Week52.jpg)
Now just find someone to provide the booth girls...
![[image loading]](http://www.teamliquid.net/staff/Kennigit/WeeklyRoundUp/COMMUNITIY.png)
Yes, the beta is still down. But looking at the activity of the Starcraft 2 Strategy forum, you never would have known. Help and discussion threads are still popping up a mile a minute as the beta-starved continue to theorycraft until their minds spontaneously implode. But not everything adds up. Yes, replays are being watched, and custom maps are being played. But under this layer of unsuspecting innocence may very well lurk a dark and lucrative trade. Yes, right under our very noses, a LAN hack could possibly have been implemented.
How else could one explain comments such as these, all written well after the beta had ended:
So, ZvZ basically sucks right now as we all know.
I find that if I do not go for an early enough robotics facility for an observer in PvT, I get heavily punished by cloaked banshee or stealth'ed ghosts 2 shotting probes (and tbh who doesnt get ghosts in TvP?).
what is the exact build order to counter a 6pool.. I just can't seem to get my gateway out quick enough.
Donning my Sherlock Holmes thinking cap, pipe, and coat, I can only deduce that they must be playing the game at this very moment, while the rest of us are suffering a slow and terrible withdrawal-based death. And what's more, reliable sources (i.e. the farthest reaches of my imagination) tell me that all your favorite units, the Zerg lurker included, make a shocking appearance. Not to mention, the possibility of chat channels? Why not! So, I heretofore send you on a conquistador's expedition to find the mountain of gold, the land of milk and honey. The panacea for our intolerable sickness for those of us too impatient to wait another week. Off, my brave countrymen, and Godspeed!
+ Show Spoiler +
Just kidding. Breaking the rules is bad, kids!
![[image loading]](/staff/Saracen/WeeklyRoundUp/Week53.jpg)
The city of gold. Just west of Your Wildest Imagination.
![[image loading]](http://www.teamliquid.net/staff/Kennigit/WeeklyRoundUp/BLIZZARD.png)
We may have been bored out of our minds for the past two weeks, but Blizzard HQ has been abuzz with preparations for the imminent second phase. Let's take a peek into their goings-abouts, shall we?
[Dustin Browder enters the room, beard unkempt and eyes bloodshot. He hasn't slept in days.]
Browder: So what's happening, team?
[The development team looks up, mildly surprised. But only for a moment. They quickly turn their attention back to the mountain of work yet to be surmounted.]
Dev A: Good news. Chat channels can be implemented, but there's a catch. We have to remove facebook integration.
Browder's face lights up, and a stupid grin slowly spreads across his face.
Browder: That's great news!...
Suddenly, a terrible change strikes his features. His brow furrows and darkens, his eyes are hard and grim. Far away, in the dark and fiery land of Activision, the Dark Archon CEOs breathe a sigh of relief.
Browder: Remove facebook integration?!? Are you insane?? How could we remove the only thing that connects gamers on a personal level? It's what keeps B.Net 2.0 afloat; it's what every gamer desires, what every gamer needs! Death to chat channels!
Dev A: Ok, whatever...
Dev B: It's also possible to implement a free LAN system...
Browder: Was that the "f-word" I heard?!? Do you know what happens to those who mention the "f-word?"
Browder pulls out a warp blade and smites the foolishly expedient developer.
Browder: Let it be known that nothing in life is free! Success always comes with a cost, and, in this case, it's the pocketbooks of our loyal fans. Just look at how our WoW division is booming! You should aspire to be just like them, the pinnacle of video game success.
[The developers shuffle uncomfortably as Browder turns to the balance team.]
Browder: What's going on at your end?
Dev C: We found out that we could improve the balance of Terran mech if we removed the smart AI from siege tanks.
Browder: And dumb down the game?? What do you think this is? Brood War? No! Keep the AI how it is, and increase the splash radius while you're at it. Maybe if we reduce the hit points a bit, we can pull it off to the community as a nerf.
Dev D: In play testing, we found that templar tech is more viable without the unnecessary dark shrine/templar archives split.
Browder: No one cares about Protoss players. They had it far too easy in Brood War!
Dev E: We made this super cool Zerg unit that brings diversity and flexibility to the Zerg army!
Browder: I don't want to hear about it. Save it for Heart of the Swarm.
Browder: Remember, phase two is scheduled to start in one week. We want no mistakes, no errors. Achievements, decals, portraits, facebook friends: those are our top priorities. And find a way to implement an online market. Back to work, men!
[As Browder flies off on bat-like wings into the darkness, little does he know that the development team withheld one little secret. A small ring forged from the fires of Activision that would soon free Browder from the evil clutches of the Dark Archons. ...or would it?]
Browder: So what's happening, team?
[The development team looks up, mildly surprised. But only for a moment. They quickly turn their attention back to the mountain of work yet to be surmounted.]
Dev A: Good news. Chat channels can be implemented, but there's a catch. We have to remove facebook integration.
Browder's face lights up, and a stupid grin slowly spreads across his face.
Browder: That's great news!...
Suddenly, a terrible change strikes his features. His brow furrows and darkens, his eyes are hard and grim. Far away, in the dark and fiery land of Activision, the Dark Archon CEOs breathe a sigh of relief.
Browder: Remove facebook integration?!? Are you insane?? How could we remove the only thing that connects gamers on a personal level? It's what keeps B.Net 2.0 afloat; it's what every gamer desires, what every gamer needs! Death to chat channels!
Dev A: Ok, whatever...
Dev B: It's also possible to implement a free LAN system...
Browder: Was that the "f-word" I heard?!? Do you know what happens to those who mention the "f-word?"
Browder pulls out a warp blade and smites the foolishly expedient developer.
Browder: Let it be known that nothing in life is free! Success always comes with a cost, and, in this case, it's the pocketbooks of our loyal fans. Just look at how our WoW division is booming! You should aspire to be just like them, the pinnacle of video game success.
[The developers shuffle uncomfortably as Browder turns to the balance team.]
Browder: What's going on at your end?
Dev C: We found out that we could improve the balance of Terran mech if we removed the smart AI from siege tanks.
Browder: And dumb down the game?? What do you think this is? Brood War? No! Keep the AI how it is, and increase the splash radius while you're at it. Maybe if we reduce the hit points a bit, we can pull it off to the community as a nerf.
Dev D: In play testing, we found that templar tech is more viable without the unnecessary dark shrine/templar archives split.
Browder: No one cares about Protoss players. They had it far too easy in Brood War!
Dev E: We made this super cool Zerg unit that brings diversity and flexibility to the Zerg army!
Browder: I don't want to hear about it. Save it for Heart of the Swarm.
Browder: Remember, phase two is scheduled to start in one week. We want no mistakes, no errors. Achievements, decals, portraits, facebook friends: those are our top priorities. And find a way to implement an online market. Back to work, men!
[As Browder flies off on bat-like wings into the darkness, little does he know that the development team withheld one little secret. A small ring forged from the fires of Activision that would soon free Browder from the evil clutches of the Dark Archons. ...or would it?]
To be continued...
![[image loading]](/staff/Saracen/WeeklyRoundUp/Week54.jpg)
One ring to rule them all... (the plot thickens)
By the way, if you haven't heard already, chat channels will be implemented. Cool beans!
![[image loading]](/staff/Saracen/WeeklyRoundUp/Week55.jpg)
Yet another tower defense map by Hyrd00, Red Circle TD is forty levels of nonstop fun. Like any normal tower defense, the goal is to kill the oncoming waves of invaders. But there's a little twist: instead of having an end point that you must protect at all costs, the little enemy hordes circle endlessly around the map while being constantly reinforced. You lose once there are 100 on the field at any point in time, and there's a nifty tracker that tells you how close you are to death. It can be played with anywhere from one to four people, and is a great time waster for those counting down the days until phase two. I personally am ashamed to admit how many hours I've spent running through this game on single player, but there's something to be said about watching wave after wave of units getting slowly mowed down by my line of firepower.
Fun: 8 (There's some sort of weird sadistic pleasure you get from watching shit die that this game does an excellent job of capitalizing upon).
Creativity: 5 (Not as revolutionary as, say, Touhou or SC Tetris, but it's impressive in it's own right).
Smoothness: 10 (Runs like a brand new Ferrari).
It's something definitely worth checking out if you haven't already, as well as the entire archives of sc2mapster.com. Don't forget to leave map suggestions for next week!
That concludes this issue of the Round-Up, thanks for reading! If you’ve got a tournament, stream, contest or other content you feel maybe of value to the Round-up, feel free pass it along. Until next week, Good Luck and Have Fun.
beta withdrawal is painful
