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Active: 635 users

[G] How to Keep Chill OUT

Blogs > Bibbit
Post a Reply
1 2 Next All
Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
June 26 2011 04:44 GMT
#1
Metagame Bisu Build Timing Push

Ok that should have gotten rid of him. We cant have him reading the plan. Alright as I’m sure we are all aware, Chill is simply too good of a moderator. Allowing people of his level to come to our forums and ban people is unfair to the newer, less experienced banlings. How are people like Micronesia and Harem supposed to flourish in this scene when Canadian gosus like Chill and Manifesto are always coming here and moderating all over the forums? Luckily I have a plan. It is a rather simple plan, without too many complex steps. It is as follows:

Step One: New Additions to the Pro Team

I fully understand that Teamliquid is already rather Protoss heavy. However, there are two additions that must be made to drive out Chill and it is merely a coincidence that they are both Protoss. First, an offer must be made to Combat-Ex.
[image loading]
Credit to TL Member Floorboard


As has been demonstrated millions of times over the centuries, Chill and Combat have a mild feud between them. Though they are both Canadian and should therefore be showering each other with presents at all times, this has proven to not be the case. In the Teamliquid community, it sometimes seems that Liquid` players themselves are higher on the totem pole than even staff members. Even if it cannot be said with certainty that the acquisition of Combat would put him higher in the chain of command than Chill, the odds are decent. If this is indeed the case, Chill will become increasingly angry by the day, raising his inclination to leave.

The second player that will be necessary for the plan is the loser of TSL 3, Naniwa.

[image loading]
Intimidating!

Naniwa is a man of very few (English) words. In the last few months alone, two separate three-or-less word sentences have risen to meme-tastic status: “It’s Okay,” and “CHILL GET OUT.” It is because of the latter sentence that Naniwa’s transition over to Liquid is a critical component of this strategy. After being yelled at to GET OUT on a daily basis, Chill will slowly enter a depression. Naturally, the only way he will be able to remedy this is by resigning as Teamliqud moderator.

Step Two: Mandatory Girl Blogs

It has recently became very public knowledge that Chill is not the giant fan of girl blogs that we all presumed he was. This information will prove to be very valuable. While I have not yet discussed the logistics with R1ch, I am hoping to have the traditional “captcha” required when joining the site changed to a mandatory girl blog of at least 500 words. To officially become a member of this wonderful community, one of would have to have their girl blog read for quality testing and accepted by Chill via a signed, notarized letter. This also has the added benefit of slowing the flow of dummies into the forums.

Step Three: Have Liquid`Meat sell his share of the site to TDot.

Unfortunately for Chill, his number of mortal enemies is greater than 1. He has been engaged in a prolonged battle with supertroll Tdot since the early 1930s. Chill rose to prominence in this community by being Teamliquid’s most finely honed Tdot slayer. Whenever Tdot came back for another attack, Chill has always been ready with his mighty Ban Hammer. If Tdot became partial owner of the site, however, he would be immune to the Hammer. Chill’s inability to take out the TrollTitan that is Tdot would absolutely cripple him mentally and emotionally. After dealing with the nonsense of Combat-Ex, the agressive hatred of Naniwa, and the cesspool of idiocy that is girl blogs, this would be the final nail in the coffin. Chill would be unable to move. Chill would be unable to feel and unable to think. He would have no other choice but to resign from Teamliquid while he carries out his years and years of psychiatric therapy.

It Is Now Complete

With Chill out of the picture, everyone from Aesop to Zelniq will be able to patrol the site entirely safe. No longer will the banlings have to constantly moderate with a sense of shame, knowing they cannot compete with the high-level banning of Chill. He and his kind will just live in a distant land, forever our superior. But it will not matter, for we will be living in blissful ignorance of the level of competition around us.

Thank you for reading but keep it quiet.

+ Show Spoiler +
Is joke! <3 Chill!!!!!! + Show Spoiler +
No seriously, dont tase hate me! + Show Spoiler +
Thanks to VGhost and Bobwhiz for inspiration. :D:D


****
Chocolate
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States2350 Posts
June 26 2011 04:50 GMT
#2
hahaha this is great
Dusty
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States3359 Posts
June 26 2011 04:54 GMT
#3
Totally agreed dude chill needs to be driven out. All in favor of making Naniwa our anti-chill leader?

+ Show Spoiler +
:3
TheAmazombie
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
United States3714 Posts
June 26 2011 04:55 GMT
#4
Aww. Chill is the man and I know he must get annoyed with the Chill-hate and GET OUT lines. Still, good post for humor. Thanks!
We think too much and feel too little. More than machinery, we need humanity. More than cleverness, we need kindness and gentleness. Without these qualities, life will be violent and all will be lost. -Charlie Chaplin
Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
June 26 2011 04:57 GMT
#5
On June 26 2011 13:55 TheAmazombie wrote:
Aww. Chill is the man and I know he must get annoyed with the Chill-hate and GET OUT lines. Still, good post for humor. Thanks!


Shit does this read as Chill-hate? He's one of my favourite mods, Chill-hate certainly wasnt my intention. D:
SonuvBob
Profile Blog Joined October 2006
Aiur21549 Posts
June 26 2011 05:00 GMT
#6
To make up for the added Protosses we should probably drop Tyler from the team. "If you can Chill, Chill"?!! Not on MY TL sir.
Administrator
3FFA
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States3931 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-06-26 05:03:40
June 26 2011 05:01 GMT
#7
Great new way to do the push! SAIR/DT FTW!!! ;-D

Edit: Also you forgot to put in a reference to the actual build order... anyone got a link?

Edit 2: Also, you can block the C with terran buildings to keep the C in a contained area.
"As long as it comes from a pure place and from a honest place, you know, you can write whatever you want."
Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
June 26 2011 05:05 GMT
#8
On June 26 2011 14:00 SonuvBob wrote:
To make up for the added Protosses we should probably drop Tyler from the team. "If you can Chill, Chill"?!! Not on MY TL sir.


LOL I think we gotta get rid of you next! :D:D
Loser777
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
1931 Posts
June 26 2011 05:07 GMT
#9
You forgot one IMPORTANT measure!

Add this puzzle to TL's front page:
[image loading]
6581
TheAmazombie
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
United States3714 Posts
June 26 2011 05:09 GMT
#10
On June 26 2011 13:57 Bibbit wrote:
Show nested quote +
On June 26 2011 13:55 TheAmazombie wrote:
Aww. Chill is the man and I know he must get annoyed with the Chill-hate and GET OUT lines. Still, good post for humor. Thanks!


Shit does this read as Chill-hate? He's one of my favourite mods, Chill-hate certainly wasnt my intention. D:


No, it doesn't, I just wanted to show some Chill-Love. =)
We think too much and feel too little. More than machinery, we need humanity. More than cleverness, we need kindness and gentleness. Without these qualities, life will be violent and all will be lost. -Charlie Chaplin
zerglingsfolife
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
United States1694 Posts
June 26 2011 05:11 GMT
#11
OMG that puzzle. That was epic.
Night gathers, and now my watch begins. It shall not end until my death. I shall take no wife, hold no lands, father no children. I shall wear no crown and win no glory. I shall live and die at my post. I am the sword in the darkness.
Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
June 26 2011 05:12 GMT
#12
On June 26 2011 14:07 Loser777 wrote:
You forgot one IMPORTANT measure!

Add this puzzle to TL's front page:
[image loading]


OMG too good! Totally forgot about that thing.
ieatkids5
Profile Blog Joined September 2004
United States4628 Posts
June 26 2011 05:13 GMT
#13
Aahhh Chill vs CombatEX and all the tdot funny business brings back good memories.
zergnewb
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States816 Posts
June 26 2011 05:16 GMT
#14
On June 26 2011 14:07 Loser777 wrote:
You forgot one IMPORTANT measure!

Add this puzzle to TL's front page:
[image loading]

Hahaha! One of the very few times I watch a stream and thats what I get to see.
Welcome to the Durst-Zone
Dalguno
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States2446 Posts
June 26 2011 06:15 GMT
#15
This gave me a smile and made my night. Thank you sir Bibbit!
"I'm gonna keep making drones cause I'm a baller, and ballers make drones." -Snute
Navillus
Profile Joined February 2011
United States1188 Posts
June 26 2011 06:25 GMT
#16
5/5 Every reference here is hilarious and the overall point of it (which I got on like the last sentence) is beautiful.
"TL gives excellent advice 99% of the time. The problem is no one listens to it." -Plexa
TheCrimsonReaper
Profile Joined May 2011
United States167 Posts
June 26 2011 06:30 GMT
#17
5/5 <3

Bibbit you made my night, double level of comedy ftw ^_^
"The emperor protects"
Grobyc
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Canada18410 Posts
June 26 2011 06:37 GMT
#18
Some newer posters might not get some references, but this was great lol

5/5
If you watch Godzilla backwards it's about a benevolent lizard who helps rebuild a city and then moonwalks into the ocean.
obesechicken13
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States10467 Posts
June 26 2011 07:17 GMT
#19
I'm probably gonna get banned for this but...
+ Show Spoiler +
I <3 the moderators. Chill did so much to nerf combat-ex and tdot to prevent them from destroying the delicate balance of the forums! Girl blogs are fine.
I think in our modern age technology has evolved to become more addictive. The things that don't give us pleasure aren't used as much. Work was never meant to be fun, but doing it makes us happier in the long run.
TheAwesomeAll
Profile Joined January 2011
Netherlands1609 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-06-26 07:58:27
June 26 2011 07:57 GMT
#20
5/5 selling the site to tdot is just too brilliant, Though i would like to see him as part of the liquid' team
Liquid'tDot. We could start by making a fan club xd
jesus i totally missed this

Metagame Bisu Build Timing Push
dead on maybe we should use the word metagame more freely :D
dr Helvetica <3
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