I can't really understand your situation here because you don't write in easy to read paragraphs. My general advice to becoming more social is to just talk to people either at lunch or at whatever clubs or activities you do. Study with someone at your IT school.

edit: It can be hard to start talking to people. I think that you just need to convince yourself that you are confident, just for a moment, and then start talking to someone and asking if you can study with them. Once you start talking, even if you turn into a stuttering idiot, you will be able to say what you need to.

I did this at the start of the school year and met 10 wonderful friends who've helped me so much to have fun and become a better person (though my grades haven't improved as much as I'd wanted :-/, I play fewer games, am more happy, and have a lot more control over myself ).

I also tried this technique to confess my feelings to a girl last year. I actually did turn into a stammering idiot, but I was able to get my point across.

Ulfsark

United States958 Posts

May 09 2011 05:13 GMT

#23

Trying to find something in common helps, like if they are wearing a shirt of a band you know or something of that nature, but this is more in a casual environs rather than work.school

RedHaZard

Australia56 Posts

May 09 2011 05:28 GMT

#24

On May 09 2011 13:51 Hidden_MotiveS wrote:
I can't really understand your situation here because you don't write in easy to read paragraphs. My general advice to becoming more social is to just talk to people either at lunch or at whatever clubs or activities you do. Study with someone at your IT school.

edit: It can be hard to start talking to people. I think that you just need to convince yourself that you are confident, just for a moment, and then start talking to someone and asking if you can study with them. Once you start talking, even if you turn into a stuttering idiot, you will be able to say what you need to.

I did this at the start of the school year and met 10 wonderful friends who've helped me so much to have fun and become a better person (though my grades haven't improved as much as I'd wanted :-/, I play fewer games, am more happy, and have a lot more control over myself ).

I also tried this technique to confess my feelings to a girl last year. I actually did turn into a stammering idiot, but I was able to get my point across.

I'm doing a bridging course because I didnt go to highschool its basicaly for drop outs

what happend with the girl?

Kitkatzy

United States213 Posts

May 09 2011 06:09 GMT

#25

You really don't like the letter L.

Crazyeyes

Canada1342 Posts

May 09 2011 06:56 GMT

#26

On May 09 2011 14:28 RedHaZard wrote:

what happend with the girl?

Yeah, I'm curious. XD

@OP: I know this has been said a bunch of times but, dude, wtf format? Just type normally. As in, full sentances with with grammar and shit. You're like... making a new line halfway through sentances... and at the end of sentances... and stuff...

As for your problem, I'm not exactly a social butterfly, but it all boils down to practice. Practice makes perfect, even in social situations.

Hidden_MotiveS

Canada2562 Posts

May 09 2011 11:56 GMT

#27

Sorry for the thread hijack.

The girl and I didn't do anything. I think in order for us to have had a chance, I would have had to be sure that I wanted a girlfriend at the time. I told her that I thought a lot about her, and that I had a crush on her. I told her that it was probably because I saw her a lot. I also said that we were very different people, and a I recognized that we would probably not work out. She was fun... and I was a nerd. We lived in the same Res too, so if things didn't work out then awkwardness would have ensued.

I felt sad for a week afterwards, not that long. I quickly recovered.

The girl went on with life, she found a boyfriend. I think that for the most part I've moved on. I don't think about her very often, significantly less that I used to. We still see each other, hang out every once in a while.

We're still friends.

I just know that in the future, if I ever like a girl and think we're compatiable, and know that I'm ready for a girlfriend, I have to be more assertive and show that I like her from the start. No bigs :3

There's nothing wrong with being assertive or social!

kollin

United Kingdom8380 Posts

May 09 2011 15:38 GMT

#28

At the moment I'm going through a rough friend period, and my advice would be, go out and get some exercise, if you have a pet take it for walks. At least thats what I'm doing.

Dittert

United States97 Posts

May 09 2011 16:08 GMT

#29

Have you considered practicing online? It sounds like you're having trouble on 2 fronts: coming up with things to say and the physical aspect of interacting (how to stand/where to meet people/etc). What if you struck up a conversation with a SC2 opponent, or someone on WoW (assuming you play), or people in an irc channel? Then you could focus on the first part (content) without worrying about the second. That might make you more comfortable when you try it in real life.

For example, if you play against someone in SC2 and you see something intriguing in their build or play style, message them after the game. Even that conversation only lasts one minute, you still successfully had a conversation.

RedHaZard

Australia56 Posts

May 10 2011 13:35 GMT

#30

thanks for all the help people!