Normally I would stick this info in one of my mind grapes until I had to squeeze it out later, or it would shrivel into a forgotten raisin. This time was different. It all sounded too familiar. Then it hit me all at once.
Stork has been possessed by the very same evil atman that took over the Jim Kelly-era Buffalo Bills.
For those of you who understand the previous statement: I KNOW, RIGHT?!
For the rest of you, I’ll explain:
In 1990, the Buffalo Bills went 13-3 in the regular season and stormed through the playoffs, only to lose to the New York Giants in an extremely close contest. The deciding moment would come when Bills’ kicker Scott Norwood made a crucial mistake, missing a field goal wide in the waning seconds of the game.
In the ’07 GOMTV S2 MSL, Stork would reach the finals and keep it close until forgetting Dragoon range in the final game.
Norwood had range, he just misclicked
In 1991, the Bills repeated their regular season success, finishing 13-3 for the second straight time. They would face the Washington Redskins and first time Super Bowl quarterback Mark Rypien. They would lose the game soundly, 24-37.
In the 2007 Ever OSL, Stork plowed through Flash and Bisu, only to face then first-time Starleague finalist Jaedong. He would lose the finals soundly, 1-3.
The Bills would make it to the Super Bowl twice more, losing each championship game to a Cowboy’s team on their way to success. The Bills played better in the rematch, even leading at halftime, but neither contest finished especially close.
Almost, Jim, almost.
Stork would follow his two previous Starleague losses with back to back second place finishes, losing each final to Flash, a rising Terran player. After losing 3-0 in the Bacchus OSL, Stork would push Flash to five games in the GOMTV Star Invitational. Up 2-1 at one point, he ultimately fell short, losing the series 2-3.
See Jim? Do it like that.
This is where it all gets a little fuzzy. Being just a Hinduism novice, I’m not sure if the atman stayed with the Bills after those Super Bowls, causing the subsequent failures of the franchise, or if it left after the ’93 game, leaving the Bills to collapse on their own under the crushing weight of their chronic failure.
Hopefully, this monstrous atman has left Stork to his own devices. Still alive in both leagues, I hope Stork shows us all that their ain’t no atman left in that man, and that his long spell of so close for so long is finally over.
Also, if you’re reading this, evil atman, I hear there are plenty of openings in the Boston Red Sox, New England Patriots, or practically any other non-New York sports franchise. Check the Red Sox first, though.