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Viola bit:
Well, a little while ago I wrote this blog about my love affair and struggle with music. (tl;dr is that I played classical piano for a very long time since I was little and after reaching quite a high level my wrists and hands became ruined from overplaying-- I have not been able to play at all without serious pain, and I will not be able to achieve the skill I once had again because of it. I am really sad about it.)
I think I have a thing for stringed instruments, lol. I can play the harp all right, but it also causes me a lot of pain. However, I had a brief stint with the violin when I was little, and quit because the class was too slow for me and I was impatient. XD
I have made up my mind to attempt to learn the Viola. I just like the timbre better than the violin, so...
I am a bit picky about instruments, unfortunately, lol. I prefer well aged instruments with 'ripened' wood, and a bit of wear from much playing. I also have a very strong preference for handmade. I am picky about where the instrument was made, since temperature and humidity can drastically effect it. I hate anything that sounds nasal >.< or very bright or limp (think greasy dead hair limp). A good instrument is like a good pet or a good teddy bear. You can't just buy a new one because it's NOT the same.
That said, good instruments cost thousands and thousands of dollars. So... I am buying the cheapest piece of crap I can find on ebay, and am going to play that for the school year. If I still want to play next summer, I shall go to a little family run shop relatively nearby at invest a couple-hundred dollars in a semi-decent studentish viola... and that should last me 2-3 more years until I have been working full-time and would have the money to invest in a more serious instrument if my hands are holding out and I want to put the time in.
I have attempted playing the piano a bit since that last blog thanks to the encouragement I received. <3 Just Czerny -.- but oh well, lol. (This is a football?)
Here also is some piano porn:
Other exciting notes:
IT came to my room and officially confirmed my connection 'sucks ass' (to quote the man who came out to test it). I am getting an access point installed in my room next week (ftw!).
The flooding in my room was finally cleaned up and my room no longer stinks. -.-
I decided I like this face and am finding lots of use for it: -.-
Freshman convocation stuffs was tonight, so we rounded up as many freshmen as we could and gifted them with tupperware so that they might bring back lots of the gourmet desserts. It was delicious, and the freshmen even got in a fight so we got to eat it all while they were yelling at each other. >o> (JK, we just got to eat our favorites, lol.)
It's going to rain for the rest of the week, which is kind of miserable, because it's also windy and umbrellas do not keep you from getting soggy.
My meal plan starts tomorrow so I won't have to mooch off freshman events for free food anymore.
I am leaving for the Ottawa International Animation Festival in about a week and a half.
This weekend I am going to NYC to be spoiledddd.
I am wearing my TL shirt out and about in hopes of meeting fellow nerds. (Was kind of useless today cause everyone was either inside or hiding under and umbrella. But I felt like a boss anyway.)
I will be organizing some lan parties in the college houses this year, because it's the year of... GAMES at UPenn. I can get grant money for this too, lol.
I hopefully will start putting lots of stuffs up on my dA.
Got promoted to plat... then moved and had work and no internets in my room... so going to start streaming and playing again, and hopefully get up to plat in the next few months (months because I don't have much time around my jobs and school to play a lot )
Playing LoL with some friends and lurking about DotA stuffs. Considering trying to play DotA2 but scared of the learning curve. Especially cause it's a team game and if you suck you don't just lose, your team loses. -.-
Been lurking about BW too, but a bit off-put by the community and the fact that there's not a lot of very newb friendly stuff out there, lol. Just want to be able to watch and appreciate it, but not really interested in playing.
Trying to be more social. >.> Small rant about that: + Show Spoiler + When I talk to most people they think I am very extroverted. I am talkative and confident and good at managing and leading. I am also really, really shy though. If there is not an activity to do or goal to accomplish I feel lost unless I am with lots of people I know. I strongly dislike parties or events for the sole purpose of hanging around and 'networking' and being social. A lot of times they feel really fake, and like no one is really getting to know each other or having that much fun.
It's not like I don't like being around people-- I do-- but I prefer going over to a friends apartment and knowing 4-5 of the 8-10 people there, and playing games, studying, or eating supper or something. Quieter things and stuff that is actually fun to me.
I am sure many people will say this is fine and not a bad thing-- but there is a bad side to it. I do not meet a lot of new people, and I have a very hard time making good friends. I am always friendly, but I need to spend a lot of time around people before I feel very comfortable with them.
This point is going to be very dumb to some degree because I don't actually want a relationship right now--but I have been asked out by a guy once in my life. I do not get flirted with, guys do not ask to hang out with me or for my number and that sort of nonsense. I am reasonably attractive I'd say, or at least not ugly, I am just a really nice/easy-going kind of person, I like a wide assortment of things, I don't have any dreaded relationship problems (super clingy, high maintenance, etc), and I'm mature. I think the main problem is that I just... don't really put myself in a position to seriously meet new people. I say hi to people in my classes, but I don't really talk to them-- or I talk to them lots in class, but I don't hang out with them outside of class because I don't have money to go out to supper at nice restaurants, and I don't want to dress up like a slut and get trashed at a frat, or I just don't get invited. I meet people in my dorm and hang out in the lounge for my section, but I don't get invited along to lots of things (admittedly because of my schedule lots of times).
I do not want to hear nonsense about 'just being myself' and not worrying about it. I am very much myself and if that is not what other people are interested in, oh well. I do not think I am so niche of a person that I just haven't met someone interested in the kind of things I like-- being outdoors, animals, books, music, games, cooking, art, history, tech-ish anything, spending time with a smaller 8-12 sized group of friends regularly. I think I just do not meet people. I am not interested in meeting people by going to frat parties and getting trashed. That is not really the people I am interested in (I don't care if people drink lol, but I don't think it's fun to go drink with a bunch of people you don't know... either you are there for booty, or there for alcohol, neither of which make an attractive person to me). Most clubs and activities here are Penn ____ (insert some gender/minority/religious/studies group here) Students for ____ (insert something along the lines of networking/support/cause). They will send you useless emails, post flyers, possibly get some money to bring in a speaker related to the topic, and let you list them as an activity you were VP of. -.-
How do I make more friends/meet new people? How do I meet guys? I think people just do not notice me because I am shy and slower to make friends. :/
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Your rant sounds like you're creating a problem when there isn't any. Cliches aside, are these things what you truly want? Do you want to be asked out by guys, make tons of friends or engage in conventional social events?
If not, then don't worry. Your example: "but I have been asked out by a guy once in my life. I do not get flirted with, guys do not ask to hang out with me or for my number and that sort of nonsense." is a peculiar one because you reassure us you're not looking for a relationship, but keep note that you've only been asked out once, etc. Is it important, what do you feel this tells you. You may be construing these unlikelihoods as faults or problems about yourself when there are none. You haven't been asked out a lot, but you seem typically fine with relationships, enough to know that you do not want one at the moment.
What do you think of this?
As for meeting people, are you unsatisfied with the friends you have now. Are they no longer "good"? Tell me what you seek in a friend and why these friends aren't up to par if you don't mind. We might be able to get to the bottom of this.
For the record, I started a StarCraft II club. I have many friends I consider "good". I wouldn't keep anything en confidence with them, but they are reliable as they are open-minded and willing to engage in activities I enjoy.
Oh, P.S: Should make a pitstop in Montreal, I have another TL member I'm meeting for the first time who will be staying in my condo: Fireblast! :B~
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You sound like a friend of mine, who is shy but seemingly outgoing and an extrovert. I remember her singing the Pokemon theme song at a restaurant while we were waiting to be seated. :-)
(Edit: She was singing quite loudly, not just to herself, in front of a large crowd of strangers.)
Also, I don't know if you want to ask how to meet guys on TL. I remember when you posted pics of you wearing your TL shirt, and then Hot_Bid asked you out on a date...
In all seriousness, since you like the small group settings, and since you're in college, are there any small musical groups you could join? How about a gaming club (good ol' fashioned pen-and-paper role playing, if you're into that sort of thing)? I met almost all of my great friends in college at our gaming club.
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On September 07 2011 14:52 aNDRoM wrote: You sound like a friend of mine, who is shy but seemingly outgoing and an extrovert. I remember her singing the Pokemon theme song at a restaurant while we were waiting to be seated. :-)
Also, I don't know if you want to ask how to meet guys on TL. I remember when you posted pics of you wearing your TL shirt, and then Hot_Bid asked you out on a date...
In all seriousness, since you like the small group settings, and since you're in college, are there any small musical groups you could join? How about a gaming club (good ol' fashioned pen-and-paper role playing, if you're into that sort of thing)? I met almost all of my great friends in college at our gaming club.
I must see this.
edit: the Hot_Bid part.
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On September 07 2011 14:54 Torte de Lini wrote:Show nested quote +On September 07 2011 14:52 aNDRoM wrote: You sound like a friend of mine, who is shy but seemingly outgoing and an extrovert. I remember her singing the Pokemon theme song at a restaurant while we were waiting to be seated. :-)
Also, I don't know if you want to ask how to meet guys on TL. I remember when you posted pics of you wearing your TL shirt, and then Hot_Bid asked you out on a date...
In all seriousness, since you like the small group settings, and since you're in college, are there any small musical groups you could join? How about a gaming club (good ol' fashioned pen-and-paper role playing, if you're into that sort of thing)? I met almost all of my great friends in college at our gaming club. I must see this. edit: the Hot_Bid part.
Start Here. :-)
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That's not him asking her out at all D:<
LOLNICE EDIT
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Perhaps I did not express my friend situation very clearly.
I have one good friend. I have plenty of acquaintances and a few (2 or 3?) friends.
I define friend as someone I am comfortable being around and don't wonder if I will end up being an awkward x-wheel if I go to whatever they invited me to. I define good friend as someone I could cry in front of (aka share really hard/personal things with).
My social situation is... really limited to talking to people in some classes, in the hall/lounge of my dorm, and occasionally being invited over by a friend to participate in some activity.
I would like to have one or two more good friends, particularly since I don't have a family support system to be there for me when things are not good, and several more friends who I can just do lots of things with. There is nothing wrong with the people I have now, but I would like to have more, because my social situation is severely lacking in my eyes. I would like to go do things with people.
I say I am not looking for a relationship right now as in-- I have not been desperately and unsuccessfully pursuing one for the past month without success and I wouldn't say yes to the first person who asked me tomorrow. I like to develop relationships slowly, so for me a reasonable timeframe seems like by the end of the school year. I feel like that's probably not going to happen in the current state of my social activities and friends. If it hasn't worked in the past it probably won't start working now? XD
@aNDRoM: I am hoping for a few mature-minded people who can give me some legit advice. XD Also I went to our activities/club fair and couldn't find anything like that. I am going to try to organize some gaming type things this year though, so we'll see how that goes.
EDIT: P.S. There were also PMs.
+ Show Spoiler +You should PM him and set up a date. He's extremely interested in you but he's too shy to tell you outright. You see, HotBid's not that great with the ladies and well... he really, really likes you so I think you should make the first move. He couldn't stop talking about you on IRC earlier.
[18:00] <Serejai> Lol you like that chick, don't you? [18:00] <HotBid> ya but i dont know how to tell her lol [18:01] <Serejai> Well... she seems to like you too so just ask her [18:01] <HotBid> lol i dunno [18:02] <HotBid> i'll try to [18:02] <HotBid> gotta get my courage up [18:02] <Serejai> Alright [18:02] <Serejai> Do it for ESPORTS
Toss him a whisper and set up a date at that Shake Shack place IMO. and... then some PMs about what a terrible troll that was XD
EDITEDIT: AND (damn it edits >.>) you have to skip through then to page 4 where my convo with HotBid picks up again.
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On September 07 2011 14:59 Torte de Lini wrote: LOLNICE EDIT
(Assuming it was directed at me, where I originally said "Here" for the link and then changed it to "Start Here".) Yeah, it wasn't just the one post. :-) Still think ETT's idea of having Sean and Nick cast the date was the best!
BTW, you're in Montreal? What part? I lived a few years in Beaconsfield, have friends in NDG, Westmount, etc.
On September 07 2011 14:50 Torte de Lini wrote: Your example: "but I have been asked out by a guy once in my life. I do not get flirted with, guys do not ask to hang out with me or for my number and that sort of nonsense." is a peculiar one because you reassure us you're not looking for a relationship, but keep note that you've only been asked out once, etc. Is it important, what do you feel this tells you. You may be construing these unlikelihoods as faults or problems about yourself when there are none. You haven't been asked out a lot, but you seem typically fine with relationships, enough to know that you do not want one at the moment.
I think it's pretty normal, people want to feel ... attractive is not the word I'm looking for, though in the context of flirting and being asked out, I guess it fits. Sounds a little egotistical, but we all need our egos stroked a bit. That's not to say that I think RedJustice only wants to be asked out so she knows she can attract someone and that's all she needs.
On September 07 2011 14:50 Torte de Lini wrote: As for meeting people, are you unsatisfied with the friends you have now. Are they no longer "good"? Tell me what you seek in a friend and why these friends aren't up to par if you don't mind. We might be able to get to the bottom of this.
That is an interesting question. RedJustice, who are your friends you currently hang out with IRL on a regular basis? Not their names or anything, but what roles do they play, so to speak? How many do you have close by?
Edit: Ah, your response to Torte did clarify a bit. That is really important. As much online as we are, the in-person interaction for shy people are (ironically?) really critical because we don't get our "friendship" cup filled by attending large parties.
Not to say you can duplicate creating a friendship, but how did you and your good friend meet? Was it in college or an old friend who's nearby (I'm just assuming you went away to school, for all I know, you go to college in your hometown)? Could you make friends with someone in a similar way?
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Do you often join in on planned events with your friends/acquaintances? Meaning do you ever host or set up events and have people join you or is it always the other way around?
On a side-note, I have this huge insecure issue where I hate having people feel bored around me. It's a little easier when we're 3-4, but when it's one-on-one, I feel the constant need to tend to their whim, entertain and inquire about their life. I can't seem to shake that issue off.
My suggestion would be to take more initiative than what you are doing now. I had made a friend at work one time: a real guy with no real aspirations besides the next step in his world of video-games, women and parties. I tried to tag-along in a lot of things he did in order to meet new friends, women, etc. I met a few, but it never panned out because they were never of my interest, I don't like parties, or rather the social occasions similar to what you describe and thus everyone I met there evidently didn't suit my interests.
You won't meet anyone at the bar if you don't like alcohol. While that sentence may seem one-dimensional, I'm trying to convey the idea that if you don't like the scene, you won't like the people involved and when I say: "take initiative", I'm referring to perhaps starting a university club. Mind you, it's a tough job to maintain, set up, etc. But the rewards it reaps are heavens above, believe me, I would know.
Can't have good friends without having friends, yadda yadda, you know this part.
Oh and take some risks, those people you meet or talk in class, consider getting to know them and take an interest in them. Pretty elementary, so you probably already know this, but hey, where do you lose out in trying?
I say I am not looking for a relationship right now as in-- I have not been desperately and unsuccessfully pursuing one for the past month without success and I wouldn't say yes to the first person who asked me tomorrow. I like to develop relationships slowly, so for me a reasonable timeframe seems like by the end of the school year. I feel like that's probably not going to happen in the current state of my social activities and friends. If it hasn't worked in the past it probably won't start working now? XD
I think I wasn't clear in what I said, not an issue though.
This is all I can think of. I hate pondering with my legs crossed.
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On September 07 2011 15:12 aNDRoM wrote:(Assuming it was directed at me, where I originally said "Here" for the link and then changed it to "Start Here".) Yeah, it wasn't just the one post. :-) Still think ETT's idea of having Sean and Nick cast the date was the best! BTW, you're in Montreal? What part? I lived a few years in Beaconsfield, have friends in NDG, Westmount, etc. Show nested quote +On September 07 2011 14:50 Torte de Lini wrote: Your example: "but I have been asked out by a guy once in my life. I do not get flirted with, guys do not ask to hang out with me or for my number and that sort of nonsense." is a peculiar one because you reassure us you're not looking for a relationship, but keep note that you've only been asked out once, etc. Is it important, what do you feel this tells you. You may be construing these unlikelihoods as faults or problems about yourself when there are none. You haven't been asked out a lot, but you seem typically fine with relationships, enough to know that you do not want one at the moment.
I think it's pretty normal, people want to feel ... attractive is not the word I'm looking for, though in the context of flirting and being asked out, I guess it fits. Sounds a little egotistical, but we all need our egos stroked a bit. That's not to say that I think RedJustice only wants to be asked out so she knows she can attract someone and that's all she needs. Wanted, needed or desired. I know what you mean. But just because you're not being asked out doesn't mean you're not desired. It sounded like she was blaming herself or looking for a problem about herself without taking into account all aspects or possibilities. If she was that unattractive or if there was such a problem that prevented guys from asking her out, why has she had relationships in the past? I'm sure there's an exception to my logic (especially since I'm exaggerating heavily with my claims), but I feel it conveys the point I'm trying to make.Show nested quote +On September 07 2011 14:50 Torte de Lini wrote: As for meeting people, are you unsatisfied with the friends you have now. Are they no longer "good"? Tell me what you seek in a friend and why these friends aren't up to par if you don't mind. We might be able to get to the bottom of this.
That is an interesting question. RedJustice, who are your friends you currently hang out with IRL on a regular basis? Not their names or anything, but what roles do they play, so to speak? How many do you have close by? Edit: Ah, your response to Torte did clarify a bit. That is really important. As much online as we are, the in-person interaction for shy people are (ironically?) really critical because we don't get our "friendship" cup filled by attending large parties. Not to say you can duplicate creating a friendship, but how did you and your good friend meet? Was it in college or an old friend who's nearby (I'm just assuming you went away to school, for all I know, you go to college in your hometown)? Could you make friends with someone in a similar way?
Bonaventure. You guys coming to BarCraft? You go to Concordia University?
The rest of my replies are in your quote, in bold.
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Australia7069 Posts
If you want to try and get into broodwar but are intimidated you should watch sayles stream. Things like ISL2 and stuff with sayle commentating will give you a good idea of whatsgoing on then you can step into the korean scene. Someone made a getting into BW as a noob playing video guide series recently.maybe watch that, even tho u dont wanna play, they could be helpful
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On September 07 2011 15:06 RedJustice wrote: I would like to have one or two more good friends, particularly since I don't have a family support system to be there for me when things are not good, and several more friends who I can just do lots of things with. There is nothing wrong with the people I have now, but I would like to have more, because my social situation is severely lacking in my eyes. I would like to go do things with people.
This does seem like two separate issues. First, having more good friends, and, second, having more friends to do stuff with.
On the former, I stand by my assertion that having more than just one good friend (your definition) is key because, to be pragmatic, you don't want to just have a single person you could really lean on because that can be taxing on a friendship, so developing good friends is a good idea, but based on the little I know about you I'm guessing that good friends have to be +1 upgraded from normal friends (groan), so you need more regular friends to build that foundation?
On the latter, definitely continue to seek out smaller clubs. They may not be visible enough to be at a club fair, if your school is fairly large. Or as you're trying to do, start organizing stuff. It's definitely more proactive.
(Sorry, this is more commiseration than advice.)
On the PMs, that's just mean, if that was a troll.
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My good friend and I met kind of randomly, and to be really honest neither of us sure how the friendship actually developed to that point. I think though it's mostly because I am a good listener, and he got kind of drunk one night and started telling me about all the issues with his ex who he just broke up with... and then after that we just started talking about more serious things and hanging out and stuffs. He lives in NYC now (I live in Philly). We talk some every day pretty much, but I don't get to do things with him now.
Part of my friendship problem is maybe I have moved 14 times? XD I have no old friends. Grew up in a house without tv/computer/internet/cell phones. Kind of hard to stay in contact with people, and you end up not making lots of real friends anyway in such a short time.
@Torte: There aren't a lot of planned events on the weekend (it's kind of whoever thinks of something and texts people, or if you run into someone). I do make an effort to ask friends if they are up for gaming/something else at least once every week or two. I cannot do things during the week because of my work/class schedule, so I really only have Friday night and Saturday to do things.
I guess club/activity/group type thing is the consensus then?
EDIT:
Thanks for the tip Kiante!
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On September 07 2011 15:24 Torte de Lini wrote:
Bonaventure. You guys coming to BarCraft? You go to Concordia University?
Nah, I went to high school in Montreal a million years ago. Now I'm in sunny Southern California. Miss the city though.
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Yeah, it sorta is because I've run out of pretentious insightful shit to say.
But overall, to be frank, you just gotta put yourself out there. Narrow the search by starting a club. It's a lot of work though.
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On September 07 2011 15:30 aNDRoM wrote:Show nested quote +On September 07 2011 15:24 Torte de Lini wrote:
Bonaventure. You guys coming to BarCraft? You go to Concordia University?
Nah, I went to high school in Montreal a million years ago. Now I'm in sunny Southern California. Miss the city though.
Ugh, wrong country mate.
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And... I really appreciate you guys reading my super long blogs and giving thoughtful replies, lolol. <333 You are all awesome. I am going to bed because I have 9 hours of class tomorrow and I stayed up too late. XD I will read/reply to anything else in the morning. ^_^
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Class at 2, so I resume my need to post in topics where I feel useful. Have a good night.
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What did you do to your hands? =/
edit: oops, missed the old blog link
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I'm over-the-hill compared to you (in my thirties), and I remember college as the best time because I had ready access to my friends like no other time in my life (high school was a close second as far as friend-access, but nothing beats getting into a dorm together and being just down the hall, and then after college people move farther away). Since you live on campus, if you can build some good friendships, it can be a great time. Good luck!
On September 07 2011 15:31 Torte de Lini wrote:Show nested quote +On September 07 2011 15:30 aNDRoM wrote:On September 07 2011 15:24 Torte de Lini wrote:
Bonaventure. You guys coming to BarCraft? You go to Concordia University?
Nah, I went to high school in Montreal a million years ago. Now I'm in sunny Southern California. Miss the city though. Ugh, wrong country mate.
Hey, I'm dual-citizen, Canadian-American, like HuK. And Taiwanese, like SEn. So I'm like HuKSEn or something (not to be confused with TaKeSeN).
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