EPTHello my fellow TeamLiquid.net members. This is a blog that will tell my last 5-6 years of my life where I lost my faith, myself and today where I start to get things back on track. Or so I hope.
The reason I wrote this blog is because I need something to channel what's inside of me. I need a place where I can write things. I feel the need to share "this" whatever that is, and what's better than teamliquid? This place has been awesome to me, from when I found this site until today and I hope and believe, for may years to come.
Teamliquid.net has done so much for me, be it the community, the staff or the players. I still remember reading LR thread, watching VODs, countless instance where I can feel happy, connected and safe. A place I can truly said, I belong in here. Where I can enjoy things I like, reading things I interested.
Let's begin then, with simple introduction.
I come from a heavily religious family. My father is often seen as "the patriarch" of my big family, being the most successful where he support the finance of our big family Mosque in his hometown. Most people would call him personally with title Kyai (though he personally dislike it since he doesn't feel qualified to be called that).
There you have it. I'm from a heavily religious family, and many people must be already guess where is this going. But that is not to be.
You see, while heavily religious, my father is not what you call fundamentalist/conservative. He's no what people in my place called Liberal Islamist, he is more on the progressive side. How can that be? Education. Education really does wonder to people.
So no, I'm not abused, forced, or anything horrible. They use reasons. They educate me and my sisters and brother very good. Including religion. I can say religion is a big part of me, and the reason why things happened the way it was for these few years.
Let's get on with the story, shall we?
Back in 2009, my father was incarcerated for corruption and bribe. My father was a government officials in one of the biggest city in Indonesia. High enough to be involved in some pretty big project that can cost hundreds to billions of dollar.
I won't go into detail since I still have bad, weird paranoia about state-wide surveillance, but at least I know he is innocent of that matters.
It's not a big deal for me. at first. We (my family) all know in this country how fucked up government can be. It's only a matter of tiptoeing and avoidin other people's crosshair to survive. Alas, my father (by the standard of government workers) can be a real pain in the ass for those who wants to do things off the book, thus ends up taking the fall.
We were fine, thankfully my mum works so my family can survive. I'm fine since it's not happening in the the Capital of Indonesia (my family there), no one at school knows so I was spared the stigma. Except two of my friends.
They being a bro, they kept their mouth off and doesn't talk to anyone. They even consoled me not long after the news broke, and we got even tighter than ever.
Back then, we were playing DotA (WC3), and dare I say we were very good at it. We might not be the best team but we were playing against some of the best team back then. If only things didn't go wrong, I'm pretty sure at least one of my teammate will still play on highest level until today.
We were king of the worlds. We were young, we can do anything. Oh, how wonderful youth is. That time was really the best of my life for me.
Little did I know I would lost both of them (and everything) in over a year.
That was the start of my dark, long and stormy phase of life.
to be continued in part 2 soon™
edit: Welp, I hit post instead of review. Oh well, what's done is done.
